I understand it's normal to want to be in a relationship, but how do you feel happy when you aren't?

eatmoregreenfood@kbin.social to No Stupid Questions@lemmy.world – 82 points –

I'm 36, and while my love life has been varied and interesting, over the last few years I've started to want to settle down. I know it doesn't happen overnight. But recently it's been weighing on me more and more. I reminisce about past relationships. I feel hopeless about meeting someone in the future who shares my values.

On the one hand you hear things like "happiness comes from within", but on the other we are social animals and 99% of us want to feel loved and to love.

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It's not easy, and it takes time to get comfortable and happy being alone. Work on hobbies, go hiking with your dog, exercise, knock out projects around the house, play videogames. It's amazing how much time there is for things when you aren't tied up with the obligations of a relationship. Eventually it feels pretty normal.

Yeah I think reframing my time and refocusing on "me" things might help.

This is exactly what I’ve done for the last 2.5 years. I started going to the gym consistently and made more time for what I like to do (graphic design and web design).

Helped immensely.