Open Letter to the Council of Elder Koalas

Respected Elders,

We write to you in anguish and despair. Many of our fellow koalas have begun to feast upon gummy bears, a colorful species of bear who are clearly our distant relatives. Indeed, our own brothers and sisters have become cannibals.

This is a repulsive stain upon our noble species. We are bears of the eucalyptus, and we cannot feast upon our own kin. Cannibalism is a grotesque betrayal of our nature.

We therefore implore you, dear Elders, enact a law strictly forbidding this dreadful act. We must protect our kind from such disgrace.

Sincerely,
The undersigned