Countess425

When people turn a popular post into an Oscars Acceptance Speech

ETA: wow thanks for the upvotes!

ETA2: omg my first gold award?? I couldn't have made it without my mom and Jesus through whom all things are possible

I'm betting on this guy not lasting until November 2024 (not sure what the over/under is on November 17, 2023).

I use it around my hairline before I color my hair so as not to stain my skin.

It's just not sustainable. Lab-grown meat is here, it just needs to get to scale, get a bit cheaper and boom. Farming and killing animals for food will be obsolete.

I can't tell what that person's intent is because the post is filled with "I'm sorry you're upset" platitudes that accept no responsibility or even an understanding of why the mods are so upset in the first place; just more unpaid work they're expected to do to keep it from happening again.

Actually, he's trying to stay out of prison now.

I am not in this image and that costs me a lot of money in therapy.

:(

At this point there's no way to do it legally. Ballots are already being printed. But legality's not an issue for Trump and his personal fan club.

I think Vance could step down, then Trump would have no running mate, I think? And a VP would be appointed by Congress if he wins? Idk.

Not everybody used to be on it. There was a stigma to socializing online. "Don't give out your address, full name, or credit card info online!!" Shit I don't want to have to give it to a person these days. Online dating, not my thing, but I love that it's bringing people together. It's not as strange to quit your job and move across the country to get married to your internet boyfriend as it used to be.

Most people on the internet are normal people because most people are on the internet.

That's okay, it's still sending all your data to Meta, and that's the important thing.

It's definitely both. Love when my husband puts work and effort into our home and life together. 😍😍

It's such a bummer he's so tired after all the chores lol

Austin doesn't want him either.

I've seen lots of speculation that Trumbo is trying to get himself thrown in jail for the publicity of it all. It would result in a huge fundraising boost and conservative outrage, even if just for a short while, and no one wants to give him the satisfaction.

I think they overestimated how much engagement the average reditter provides. Most people are consuming content, but not contributing any or posting comments or clicking ads or anything. 90% of engagement is driven by like 20% of users or some shit like that.

Aha! The only solution to this endless waste of bureaucracy is privatization!

Yeah, those are all pasta. Spaghetti is all the long noodles.

The best thing reddit could come up with is... More unpaid work for mods to do!

Bidet life is best life

His fundraising is going historically terrible right now.

Not to mention Hunter Biden is getting his in court? It's just boring tax fraud and a gun charge and he's taking his punishments without much fuss and working to rectify his transgressions, tho, so nobody cares. Also he never worked for the government in any capacity ever.

I have lady pockets in the front which do not fit a cellphone, so typically back right pocket.

Yeah, a lot of them were born in the 1950s.

The Old Testament is the Hebrew Bible. The New Testament is the book where Jesus says, "f those first five books. Turn the other cheek."

The Renaissance is not "some homogeneous past", it's a pretty specific time period: the 15th and 16th centuries.

We live in a two party system. Not voting for your guy is essentially a vote for the other guy. Especially when elections are this close.

Probably got lambasted for being one of the worst non-apology apologies in the history of apologizing.

They're expecting the mods to keep the mods from protesting things done against mods in the future.

I'm moving into a retirement community. Get in there early enough and they have to take care of you until you die. But before that point, retirement communities are like dorms without having to worry about grades or getting pregnant. Lotta syphilis, though, I hear.

I wouldn't say zero penalty; his poll numbers are shit. They were before the story leaked, but nobody seems to be Teflon the way Trump is. He's possibly tanking North Carolina down ballot, and could even flip the state for Kamala. His political career is surely finished. It would have been before now if the GOP had their way, they tried really hard to get him to drop out.

I'm hosting Thanksgiving this year. I'm so psyched to show all the old crones in the families how to do a proper holiday. I have so many fucking garlands in my Amazon shopping cart. Need another paycheck or two before I can pull the trigger.

Traveling around the holidays is great. The best flight I ever took was in early December. Everybody and their grandma just flew home from Thanksgiving; everybody was saving up and working to pay for Christmas. The Philly airport was deserted. Getting from the ticket counter to my gate was like 4 minutes. I had time to eat so many crab fries.

Similar to Ted Kaczynski.

I look really young. Like I'm 40 but routinely pass for early 20s or even late teens if I do my makeup with that aim.

I get carded buying alcohol a lot. I hated it until I was about 27, and it really started to make me feel great! Especially once my gray hair started growing in (I dye it regularly so nobody really sees them, but I know they're there). If all you're trying to do is guess how old I am from how I look, I will love your answer.

But people often judge my experience or expertise as if I am only as old as I look when I am really twice that age. I hate when people assume I'm the office assistant or new hire when I'm the Assistant Director. I had physical therapy for several months due to a chronic shoulder injury, and the old ladies there loved to tell (not ask) me that physical therapy must be so easy for me as if my joints aren't fucked and my pain and effort aren't real. Still pisses me off so much.

And don't get me started on the creepy old guys who see legal jail bait...eugh.

Of all the First Amendment violations caused by Governor Abbott's office, and this is the one they choose to fight? There's nothing academic on TikTok that isn't available somewhere not scammy. How stupid. Fight for trans kids, jesus christ.

A NATO member will have to invoke Article 5, and NATO delegates will meet to discuss and vote on if it deserves NATO deployment. The annual summit in Lithuania is being held next week and Ukraine is expecting an invitation to join. What Russia is prepared to do if that happens... 🤷‍♀️

US Congress is trying to get the Commander-in-Chief (Biden) to go on record saying that blowing the power plant will trigger a NATO response, but US Congress isn't NATO's boss. It is pretty commonly accepted that unprovoked deployment of nuclear weapons by anyone anywhere (but especially by Russia in Ukraine) will trigger a NATO-led response.

It's this. He testified today, and earlier against Cohen, in exchange for immunity for crimes that he willfully and knowingly committed.

A lot of it is still "pandemic chic" when we all lived in PJs for two years with an occasional smart top for on camera zoom calls. People will get sick of it soon enough (I sure have. If I never see another peasant/little house on the prairie dress again it'll be too soon). I'm really happy with the boom in bras without underwire, though, I'm never going back to underwire.

By your own logic if A wins by 1 vote and you chose not to vote for your guy, B, you essentially gave your vote to A. Good job.

I didn't realize Joe Biden was the Prime Minister of Israel

The only reason here, is BS. The kid is real, he's a grown-ass adult with children of his own that he wants to keep away from the general public. This is conservative propaganda to make you think Johnson's statements on racial injustice (which lean toward "my white kids get opportunities and have an easier life that my black kid doesn't) are bunk. Which they're not, just because the guy doesn't want to do photo ops and give press releases doesn't mean he's fake. Johnson was first elected to Congress less than 10 years ago. His son made a decision not to be a pawn for his adopted father's political career to avoid the public, not his father; and the public are generally terrible, which makes it an appropriate and rational decision.