Start holding a pregnant teen miss Texas pageant, ages 13 (at due date) to age 17, nationally televise it. Have questions concerning what they plan on doing for education, work, where they'll live, if the father is in the picture, also basic life experience questions and knowledge questions... Make it as uncomfortable for the viewers as possible.
More like: "by opening this box you have contractually agreed to vote against the formation of any union and to report all union forming activities to your goblin overlords. Furthermore, by being 'present' or 'employed' by this corporation when this box was opened, it anytime in the future, you also contractually agree to the rules outlined above. Should a legal dispute arise concerning this contract you are bound to mediation to determine that you are wrong and the corporate legal fees will be deducted automatically from your paycheck, no matter where you are employed."