Changing name at work, a little nervous
Jimbob0i0
2 Post – 53 Comments
Joined 1 years ago
Struggling a bit with an emotionally hard weekend
My girlfriend pretty much shoved me into the fitting rooms the first time I went to buy a skirt... I was so very nervous showing the gal on the door the one item to try on.
Fast forward a bit and I had a lovely experience at the Levi store ... was looking for a new pair of jeans for a holiday. As I was looking at the various cuts I was unsure wear to pick up, as I wanted something more form fitting. My partner said that the female cut has very little crotch area though, so potentially an issue there... so was looking in the men's section.
Assistant in the store came over and offered help. I somewhat shyly mentioned that I was looking for someone a little tighter on the skin, and mentioned "I have a masc pair already" ... their eyes pretty much lit up "Well you won't find what you want on this side of the store" and pretty much dragged me over to the women's section, and started pulling bits off the shelf and holding them up to me.
"Well this is pretty much the equivalent of a mens 34 waist, what do you wear normally?"
"Well my femme size in my clothing is usually a 16..."
Again a slight grin... before rushing me over to the cubicles to try on the items they picked out...
A very good eye they had... picked out a pair so comfy and I felt really good in. Was also just such an affirming experience.
Because you're focused on the visuals from a single user perspective...
- There's the world state and game logic to consider as well, and this would be relevant even in a 2D sprite based game.
- The article makes it clear that it's the couch co-op split screen that is causing the most headaches, with whatever additional overhead there is in maintaining another active character and rendering of the world on screen.
Waiting on them to fulfil my GDPR data request.
One I've got all my data (since there was some useful stuff there over the years) I'll follow up with the "right to be forgotten" request as well.
I've been through a bit of an emotionally exhausting week with some personal things...
I suspect some of that might have come through on my mini essay ... uh... sorry to whoever had to read it?
But hey I'm here so....
If I'm feeling on the femme side of things when I arrive, do I need to be tied up?
I'm really struggling with gender identity at the moment tbh and this article really speaks to a lot of the internal blargh I have going on in my head.
"What am I" is a question that keeps bouncing round in there... even if it's a flawed question in the first place with the feeling of needing a label to try and define one self a bit...
Not gen z but a bit older than that... I'm only just beginning to understand and accept my queerness and it is very frustrating and mentally/emotionally exhausting at times not having the vocab to express how I feel.
Labels do help with that... provide some basis of common lingo. Somewhere to start with actually being able to speak about how one is feeling.
Speaking of that instance... has there been any progress on federating with them again?
I was surprised to see little talk about Donald's Jan6th charges on my feed, but after flipping accounts I realised most of the chatter was going on over there.
I don't particularly mind if I need a dedicated LW account... but it would be nice to be able to keep my posts consolidated under this one.
This is just insane...
Yes the DoD has war plans on how to attack anyone at need... Heck there almost certainly are plans for how to handle an insane UK.
The President can ask for these plans at any time.
That doesn't mean the DoD wants to actually carry out those plans.... but then why did Donald ask for them?
Although we're no longer under the higher level EU legislation, the entirety of it was incorporated into an updated DPA during the Brexit reconciliation process.
So you could still go through the same process... and frankly Reddit won't really know whether they need to act by it so go ahead...
The past week has been quite the mix of highs and lows.
Couple of rough patches with partner.
Having a very affirming experience in Ann Summers, getting my first lingerie under her guidance.
Having my referral to the gender identity clinic confirmed.
Feeling very called out here... internal monologue can be annoying, frustrating and mean.
Funny in literally midpoint in a walk at the moment... though I've paused to get my nails done as another source of calm.
I literally cannot choose...
The past couple of weeks would have needed all of these at various times....
Yup when I migrated from Digg to reddit in the big exodus 12 years back there was a lot of chatter surrounding the whole thing... lasted a month or two as I recall... then we "refugees" settled into an integration of communities...
I expect similar to occur here.
Since I started to lean more femme in my usual attire this really has become a problem...
Which is also fair as the lines can get very blurred dependant on the definitions in play...
Trans/NB/Fluid/queer are all very closely related after all and people can identify with all of these.
Have an introductory session with a therapist on Thursday now...
Thank you ❤️
Hope it goes well for you!
Previous name will be well known...
Agreed with my leadership that I'd put a quick heads up on Slack today in my team channel that my name has changed to avoid surprising anyone Monday, and to give the weekend for anyone to digest.
Response was positive so here's hoping no issues as work goes next week.
Had a lovely time at a Pride event on Saturday.
Then fell a bit poorly, to the extent my partner just pointed me at the bed and I passed out the previous two nights without raising any fuss.
Important context here, my partner is a trans woman herself so understands much of my current headspace. She's also my dominant in a dynamic, the caging was more linked to that at first. We share a lot of our clothing these days, we're the same size in that... she's just taller than me. I've been dressing femme for a few months now after initially coming out as fluid... that's normal to us...
The field I work in has a variety of background checks for clients... so for a while until I decide to get new identification documents my deadname will float about... plus my family don't know about the changing name yet.
Very much ups and downs here...
Had my assessment with my private medical cover over my gender identity wtf
Counselling sessions start this week.
Saw friends at the weekend which was nice... apart from the actual bbq being a pretty heavy disaster for my partner and me.
It's not been a good week tbh...
Had a very rough patch with my partner that we're trying to work through, but it's tough.
A lot of tears, some minor self harm, emotions on an erratic seesaw.
Weekend plans are some shopping, see my new nephew, some time with my daughters and preparations for vacation next week.
Have popped into ModCoord a couple of times to check on the state of things... but haven't been in any of my usual subs.
Need to start subscribing to specific communities here soon but for now enjoying the mix that is all/(active|hot) 😀
That's a pity, but also very understandable.
Thank you for taking the time to reply ❤️
Have a lovely break! ❤️
I've had a lot of cats as pets over my life to date.
Three of my favourite were all black kitties.
Then there was my dark tortoiseshell who will always have a special place in my heart.
Yes... it's good to have a better understanding of oneself. It's been a bit of a roller coaster though...
First exploring and understanding the bi side of my sexuality... and more recently there's been exploration of a long buried fem side.
Came out at work as they/them a few weeks back... was at a Pride march yesterday.
Now ready to hide under a blanket and cuddle a stuffie....
Don't... the comments by our (UK) minsters yesterday were appalling and very concerning...
Someone should show Defcon to them as well...
I think it also important to note that it wasn't just the pricing itself, which was indeed already heinous, but that the rate calculation changed. It used to be a rate per user per app (apikey+oauth) but they changed that to just the per app ... that then has a multiplicative effect on the costs and makes the "free tier" they were talking about especially pointless....
It would be easy for an app to start at free tier ... not have much growth through word of mouth but enough given the per app rates to push it over boundary points ... and then be due a significant and unavoidable invoice in a couple of months...
Fucker Carlson streams his show on twitter, since he was fired from having his bullshit platformed on Fox.
Prepare for a rabbit hole... but this ought to get you started...
I've been struggling with gender identity for a bit now.
On the fluid side I find it interesting/amusing they talk about days or weeks...
Frankly I'll wake up and not really know what I feel like for a bit... causes a lot of dozy first thing confusion and frustration.
Heck in a conversation with my partner depending on mood I'll flick between he, they and she ... which can be extremely confusing for both of us.
You cruel person... I hate driving through there... 🤣
NB genderfluid checking in here.
Find it interesting that you say that as biologically male you identify more as a man.
Though I do fall that way on occasion, when I lean away from a neutral they position I tend to lean towards she/her more often than not despite being born male.
Mental health is extremely important and often overlooked.
Thank you for everything you've done to date.
Take your time and we'll all be here when you're ready ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜