I have a love/hate relationship with the safety crew.
They're why I have to waste time each year rewatching the exact same shit, but equally, I have seen too many incidents of someone ignoring the protocol and getting severely hurt.
What fucks with me these days are the less gory ones.
Like watching a woman's hand get caught under a rivet press because she thought she would be quick enough. Safeties failed, no one could hit the kill switch in time. She's lucky she has use of that hand left, at this point.
Warm up some garlic naan, then plop your pasta on top. I think it turns out better than a tortilla.
So, uhh...
How'd you taste? They leave good reviews? No weird diseases, properly cooked?
And how much?
There's just a mild dissonance between that title(which is an awful thing, hopefully they all land on their feet after this), and the happy as fuck Disney Magic Kingdoms image.
You happy about this, Mickey? Does this please your cold corporate heart? They shoulda tied you to the anchor and left you for erased, you sick rat.
Very real, from what I can tell.
Old West, Marshalls dialogue options.
"Your replies (a) Dude, the way that we have treated Native Americans is most non- triumphant! (b) Excellent, dude! Cowboys and Indians?! Count me in! (aa) Dude, remember the golden rule - be excellent to each other. (ab) Dude, violence never pays. (ac) I just do not think that we should treate Native Americans in this most bogus way. (ba) Before I can enlist, good captainly dude, I must find ___! (bb) Look dude, the way that I've been treated around here, I have little interest in fighting to defend these people. (bc) I'd love to sign up, but ___ has my pen."
Bill and Ted's Excellent Video Game Adventure.
Here's a walkthrough, for anyone curious. It lists the various dialogue choices you had with each character.
Just please, if you're going to eat it in the store, find a trashcan.
I'm not paid enough to give a flying fuck about you deciding to steal a 6-tender box, but I do have to clean said box off my donut window shelf, which is now greasy and smells like fried chicken. No one wants this. Put it in the goddamn trash. Crows have better manners.
Actually, fuck it, I encourage you to steal food if you need it. I bake myself shit all the time. We have a black market of food between a few sections in my store.
I've gotten to the point that I look up if there's a good reward for it. Like, does this run through the whole game and build up to at least a nice cutscene or piece of gear? Alright. Annoying, but doable.
A piece of golden shit? Never again. Never a-fucking-gain, I swear I had a faster time pulling KOS-MOS in XC2 than hunting down so many Koroks.
Funnily enough, the men in my family are the cooks, normally!
My step-grandmother, though... She knew how to bake. It didn't matter what she decided to make, it would turn out delicious. She refined a Black Forest cake recipe from scratch, I've never had another one like it. The moistness of the cake, icing just rich enough to make a statement, cherries that were the perfect ripeness.
She ruined that cake for me. I know a part of it is the memories, all the time wrapped around when she would bake that, but if I had one wish, it would be to have one more slice.
Is that a giant spoon I hear speeding its way over?
Do... Do people exist without the Rocky Horror soundtrack living in their head?
That is some prime virgin activity, which means we need to hold some Games before the show starts.
I'm trying to get my own hands on it, but all of her cookbooks are in boxes that currently reside with my grandfather's new wife, who has made it her mission to piss on everything of his old life, even his family.
My company was discovered using monkeys for emissions tests. They were gassing monkeys, and legitimately used "everyone in the industry does it" as an internal defense to quell upset staff.
Fuck Volkswagen. Straight up. No fucks given, worst job I ever worked.
My high school had a rule about the "difficulty" of books you could read. You weren't supposed to read too high "above your grade". I assumed this rule was something with the school library and their Accelerated Reader program.
Nope! Tried to give me ISS because I was reading "Screwjack", which I brought from home. It wasn't even in class! I was a fucking junior. A high school junior should be able to handle Hunter S. Thompson.
According to them it was "college level" and therefore I shouldn't be reading it. My father raised absolute hell in that office. Don't think they tried enforcing that rule again.
They also tried bitching about girls tops until a group of very pissed off redneck fathers had questions about how they were touching the students to measure the width.
That doesn't look big gay enough.
That's a font that says "I'm having a wonderful day!" and trots off. I expect my big gay fonts to scream "I'm super". Maybe break into a song or two.
Hey, you forgot page 3.
"Turns out the company I design bioweapons for was evil. Who knew?
Itchy. Tasty."
About to say, I'll be kind, but you wanna sass me? When I kept your ass alive in the fire? When I'm topping your DPS while pulling the tank outta the red? Bitch, I'll keep myself alive while I walk outta here.
Don't cross your healers. We might sometimes be sluts for some praise, don't mean we'll take shit.
Heart, while a terribly defined power, was shown to be able to influence animals to do your bidding in a comic.
This motherfucker coulda been rollin' up on a tide of goddamn bears to these engagements. Shit yeah, gimme that ring, I'm headin' to the closest zoo.
"They expect people to get fucking water from this? No wonder they're fucking dying!"
You all stop, look at the hole, and collectively have that feeling of it being done. There's no need for words. You came together, you dug a hole, now to go back to your separate vacations/lives and think back wistfully on the better days in the hole.
Oh, but we have nothing to say about Togepi?
TOGEPI?!
The little ball of anarchy and treachery who will use Metronome and sheer cuteness to make your life a living hell?!
The other four are fine. But that egg shoulda been hardboiled.
From a GameFAQs guide:
"Your replies
(a) Dude, the way that we have treated Native Americans is most non- triumphant!
(b) Excellent, dude! Cowboys and Indians?! Count me in!
(aa) Dude, remember the golden rule - be excellent to each other.
(ab) Dude, violence never pays.
(ac) I just do not think that we should treate Native Americans in this most bogus way.
(ba) Before I can enlist, good captainly dude, I must find ___!
(bb) Look dude, the way that I've been treated around here, I have little interest in fighting to defend these people.
(bc) I'd love to sign up, but ___ has my pen."
Looks like it was a dialogue option with a Marshal character.
Well, if they would just allow Blitzball, problems like this wouldn't happen in the first place.
People laughed at me when I said this would happen. Laughed so loudly. WHO'S LAUGHING NOW?!
Oh yes, all of your "farm fresh" and "handmade" goods are so nice, but at what cost?! Where do we draw the line? They pop up where they please, sell what they like, and disappear into the early evening with whatever was left behind!
You can't trust these "farmers" and their nameless "market"! Why are there so many of them? How do they appear to operate independently, but with so much goddamned planning? WHERE DO THEY TAKE THE CHILDREN AT MARKETS END?!
"I Have No Mouth, And I Must Scream".
I realize most might just see it as unsettling, but I've known someone like AM. Obviously not a giant supercomputer, but with that much hate. With that much blind rage, that everyone around him must suffer for daring to exist. That would happily keep someone alive just to bring them more pain.
As much as I love that story, every time I read it leaves me a little more terrified, looking over my shoulder, waiting until I'm put in my cage because I dared break free, even almost 20 years later.
Don't you mean you'd krill for this setup?
No, no, don't assist me, I'll make my way to the guillotine promptly.
I wouldn't be surprised if Shadow came out as gay.
Unless it was aimed at anyone outside of Sonic.
And Big is an Aroace in a platonic life partnership with Froggy, and I refuse to believe otherwise.
Bah. I've felt worse looking in the mirror most mornings! Your attempts are nothing against the horrors my own mind may make!
I know we all joke about this being a cult, but...
Someone build a giant throne in the middle of this thing, I think I know what needs to be done.
For anyone curious/looking to keep a copy just in case, GOG still has it listed and on sale for $3 US.
If you've never played it before, go. Now. Buy it on sale, hunt down an old physical copy, pirate it, just play it. There is a reason BG&E is so well loved, even today. It's an absolute blast of a time.
ETA: Instead of just mentioning it, here's the link.
Arson.
If you're willing to deal with the later costs on your body, learn a trade.
Plumber, electrician, HVAC. Everyone needs something serviced, it's just getting your name out/getting with a good company. Bonus, these things can follow you anywhere. Big city to small townships.
Welding is another solid one. Good welders can be in high demand.
Again, be forewarned, take care of yourself now, and be ready for it to catch up with you down the line. It's rough on your body.
Do they have an audiobook version?
Bastards illiterate.
So long as you remember that cuts both ways.
If I don't get to take my monster trucks up Booby Mountain, you don't get to make Jingle Balls.
This is an odd one, but Rimworld.
If your colony is close to collapsing, you have a chance for a "Man in Black" event where a stranger in black comes in and, hopefully, turns it all around.
But what if the MiB doesn't trigger? Hell, what if they're a pacifist pyromaniac with a meth addiction who wandered into a mass of cannibal sex slavers having a rave over the ashes and dies?
Someone will eventually come. It might take in-game years, but eventually, a pawn will come and want to make those ruins home. You can try to rebuild.
Admittedly, it can be quicker to just call it done and roll up a fresh colony over watching the seasons pass, but I like how even a complete loss doesn't mean the story is done.
That is probably the review by a man with at least one "Hypnotically Caucasian"(dibs on the band name) woman out in a trailer, chained to a wall.
Well then, invent more.
People keep saying it's a dead language, but I keep seeing it around. Sounds more like a goddamn lazy language to me!
Okay, so I have, in the worst case scenario, 5 turns for you to pull all 5 pieces of Exodia, The Forbidden One.
3/4 if you have the means to play Exodia, The True Forbidden One, and get it onto my field.
But Whimsicott is a grass type. This means if you delay to a 6 turn play, you're walling anything Blue or otherwise Water related.
.... Fuck it, Blue Eyes White Dragon.
Beach dates with Miller.
The Spa Incident.
"You're pretty good".
Outer Heaven be gay as hell.