a then coworker that usually threw small get togethers for work friends, invited me to an event in his house. i thought it was the usual kind of reunion with a few people from work, so i show up with some snacks and a 12 pack. turns out it was a massive party with a couple hundred people from the small town he lives in. within the first 5 minutes i arrive, once i realize what’s going on and adjust to the unexpectedness of it all, i see someone dancing in a group of people that i find very attractive. after staring for a few seconds, they turn to see me and we exchange a few flirty looks. after a couple hours of talking with friends and mingling, we end up in the same table. although we haven’t talked to each other, we keep exchanging looks. no one has the courage get up and go talk to the other one. since i drove with friends, when they decide to leave i just follow them back to our car to go back home. but right at the door i’m like “fuck it, i’m going for it”, and i tell them i forgot something and have to go back. on my way back, i meet the other person halfway from the far back table we were sitting at to the entrance. we just stare at each other for a moment and they say: “hey, can i get your number?” to which i replied “that’s what i came back for.” we moved in together 5 months after that and we’ve been together for 7 years now.
so you are choosing to go from having issues with those things to not being able to do it at all? I don't understand. isn't finding/solving the issues part of the testing you mention?