SRLorax

@SRLorax@lemmy.world
0 Post – 4 Comments
Joined 3 months ago

It was not easy to train, nor to keep, but meditation upon waking is vital to me now. I find whatever my biggest struggles are, money, relationships, work stress, family… those anxiety demons are waiting to pounce upon waking. If not, my phone will deliver fresh demons. So I claim my mind as my own before allowing any other influences to set a tone for the day. Start with a 10 minute guided practice from a voice you trust easily. Go from there.

I’m 43 and have had pretty troublesome ADHD my whole life. I was a mess of a student and failed at several careers. That said, I have found some intermittent and sometimes lasting success working in tech sales. I am still a disorganized mess. I still need meds. I take Vyvanse. What has brought some semblance of organizational presence for me is journaling. When I journal in the morning, it calms the noise and releases some of the pressure. The entries are garbage noise from my brain mixed with some formatted statements of accomplishments. Any kind of positive streak I have going gets a mention. It helps to not feel like the chaotic anxiety and noise bomb that I often can be to people.

Meds help, but they change things. Adderall makes me high and obnoxious until I crash. Concerta makes me mean and unable to transition. I worked in mental health for a long time and didn’t like what I saw happen to people with strattera, so I haven’t tried that one. Vyvanse gives me the push and focus without the hyper focus or mood crash. My emotions seem like my own. That’s why I stuck with it.

There are areas that your ADHD can thrive. You are allowed to indulge in those. You can forgive yourself for being extra weight for the people you love at times.

If your life affords you any room for it, be outside and find any way(s) to create. Cook, sing, write, play ping pong… ADHD does offer some areas of excellence along with the deficits. Lean into those whenever and however you can.

It’s still the world. It still actively hates you. We've got to get through this life somehow though.

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So this is hard because I didn’t take it myself, but I worked in a mental health hospital for 12 years and saw how different meds interact with different people. What I saw somewhat consistently with strattera was a shortening of temper. Lisa so in children, but with adults, I saw people become violent over what most would consider mild disruptions to their day. When I spoke with some of the doctors I worked with, a few said that they wouldn’t ever recommend this med because their patients reported feeling angry all the time. Keep in mind, this is all just my little experience. I kinda hate taking meds, but today I take gabapentin and Vyvanse and both my adhd and anxiety are mostly pretty manageable. I still fuck up my bills and forget important things and all the stuff that comes with the loudness of ADHD. I am enjoying my life though and I’m able to keep to most of my healthy routines.

Heinz Doofenschmirtz!!!