So_zetta_slowpoke

former current slave plantation

Anyone who comments "this", "holup", or "came here to say this" can go fuck themselves.

I'll stop doing this when we make a new punctuation that conveys my need for people to like me lol

If someone tells you who they are, believe them.

I mean, who do you think bought them the flag? 🤷‍♂️

4046 years is pretty old for a tree

Except maybe to prison 😅🥲😢😭

Painting miniatures. Anyone can do it and make their board games look way nicer.

...Can you burn a Luigi board?

Oh, that's right! What's up, Mr. Cheezle!

It'S nOt A bUbBlE!

Maybe don't make your whole political strategy about tearing people down and try to actually run candidates who are better in some measurable way

Least cringe Rick & Morty fan

Back in my day you'd be lucky to see a javelina. Now you just want to kill em. Must be fuckin' nice!

I'm not sure how it is in the USA at large, but where I live, I can walk right into a store and buy a gun, but I have to get a special permit to own a bulletproof vest 🤦‍♂️

Wouldn't want to make it harder for the police to murder me I guess.

What if his head just, like, did that

I'm not one for conspiracies or whatever, but I do worry about escalation. I'm not worried too much about the cops themselves, most of them are just bullies and not that bright. I'm worried about who the government sends when the cops can't contain a situation.

Jokes are usually more clever 🤣

They need to do way instain mother> who kill their babbys becuse these babby cant frigth back?

But then how will we criminalize a massive swath of our population and fill up all of the for-profit prisons?

Looks like meat's back on the menu, boys

Will it hurt baby top of his head?

Those are rookie numbers.

Do I have to drink my own urine? No. But it's sterile, and I like the taste.

American, and this is the correct answer

"Mission Statement" off of Mandatory Fun is totally a style parody of Crosby, Stills, and Nash. Pretty funny too, because it takes the sound of a free love hippie group from the 60's and uses it to ramble off a bunch of corporate buzz words.

I could see it being a straight parody of their song "Carry On", but Al usually sticks a lot closer to the original arrangement when doing song parodies.

Hey! Did you know that in terms of...

Still waiting on that Trump health plan

WHY ARE YOU DODGING THE QUESTION?

If my wife were here, she'd tell you that there's a special place in heaven for animal lovers.

Pot, black, says Kettle, silver, is 'black'.

Little Bobby Tables, we call him.

Doom Eternal sucks ass, I'm so glad I tried it on game pass instead of buying the damn thing.

When you're only havin' seconds, I'm having 23rds

Oh Don Piano

Hoc damnum est?

Hamlet 2

Please don't go. The drones need you. They look up to you.