I think so, but I'm so deep on the autism spectrum that I'm probably SCUBA-certified, so...

Being defederated by lemmyworld is a badge of honor. Keep up the good work!

How the fresh fuck is this even a thing still? Even back in the 90's I heard dudes making gags about "Uncle Ben Hot Rods". You know. RICE IT UP!

GET IT? They're shitty race cars made by a shitty race who only makes cheap stuff!

🤮

Yes. Now post a picture of your hog.

Meanwhile, I am permanently banned from YouTube for uploading a 45 second clip of an episode of Star Wars Rebels as a private video to share with my kids, after we just (legally) watched it and they thought it was cool.

Such a good system.

Oh my God, that's disgusting! Illegal streaming services online? Where? Where did they post those?

As an enlightened political centrist, I would only eat at Them-Person Hooters. I inappropriately sexualize ALL genders!

I am very intelligent.

pwepawing u 4 UwU pwivacy invasion install sowwwwwyyyyyy ｡ﾟ･（>﹏<）･ﾟ｡

If it's "failed" they can write off the investment as a loss. They get a tax break as a result. Capitalism rewards innovation (in tax avoidance), after all.

Not to say that Steam doesn't have some tremendous issues on this front (it does), but I truly wish more companies understood this. If you let me play / listen / watch your thing on whatever device I choose, for a reasonable one-time price, in perpetuity, I will pay that price.

Ten bucks for a Witcher season? Sure. A fiver for the latest season of Glup Shitto's Starred War Adventure? Yeah, I'm in. I'm not gonna pay $180 a year to five different companies each to watch six or seven new maybe great but probably mid TV shows.

Same goes for games. I'm not paying $80 plus a $40 battle pass every year to play Call of Duty 2: 3: War Crimes Boogaloo, Part 5. I'm just gonna steal your shit. I will not feel bad about it in the slightest.

You quietly comply. Then take tougher security measures to protect yourself before continuing. Do not respond under any circumstances. If you're served with actual legal papers, retain an attorney.

"Responsive design" that ignores me when I ask for the desktop site. Yes, I know it isn't "optimized for my resolution". Show it to me any way, damn it.

Wow, stop saying sensible things. Be less correct. Thanks!

Me, autistic: "Huh, what are modular synths? I wonder what Pickle Junior meant by that."

Me, autistic, 9 months from now, probably:

If you can't find where you missed a closed parentheses, just add a bunch of them to the end of your project like this...

)))))))))

... until your editor's syntax helper tells you it's good. I am very good at coding.

I have fond memories of meth, though.

Short answer: No.

Long answer: Your laptop desires are common, but unprofitable. Even if manufacturers charged twice as much for them, they'd lose out in the long run. Because you wouldn't need to buy a new one every three years.

It's the same problem that mobile phones have. Year after year, the number one complaint in consumer surveys is: "I want longer battery life!" It's been like that for 20 years now. You're never gonna see it. The battery having a short daily life—as well as a short lifecycle (before you have to bin the device because the battery isn't replaceable)—is an intentional design choice. It ensures you keep buying The Coolest New Thing every few years. That's money in the bank, baby!

I do. Windows 11 is just a bunch of bloatware and ads stuffed in a trenchcoat. I want to be able to use all those rams and GBs I downloaded, without half them being tied up in tracking.

We used Santa (et al.) as an exercise in critical thinking. Outside of saying, "Yep, the Easter Bunny did it." we never directly lied about it. If they asked a question about it, we answered truthfully.

Child: "Whoa, how does he visit all those homes in one night?"

Dad: "It's impossible unless he uses magic."

C: "Whoa magic is real??"

D: "Nope."

They all figured it out on their own before they hit grade school.

"I prefer the one I'm posting from." - every single response

Ages ago, I won a bet that I would get carded at the pub if I shaved, even if I was wearing an expensive suit. I was 35 at the time.

A direct cremation plan. And instructions to not have your ashes interred in a graveyard or funeral home. It'll save your loved ones thousands of dollars, and save them from being exploited by the multi-billion dollar funeral industry.

I get what you're paying for, too. 🏴‍☠️

You don't get to be a billionaire by paying for NFL Sunday Ticket. Embrace hustle and grind culture!

All of them, I think.

Are you referring to some pre-capitalism economic systems?

Yes. The person with the hammer and sickle handle, who moderates Leftypedia, thinks we should retvrn to a caste system. You nailed it. Your question is definitely in good faith.

That was a very cool read. I'm not particularly technical—I can build a PC and install an OS, and that's about it—and I understood most of it. I had no idea that cursors were such heavy pieces of crap!

Mine already was 95% developed before EA's investors shit their pants over holiday season sales.

I can play a free-to-play shell of it now, but my closest friends are all gone now. What fun is a 4-to-8 player game when everybody you wanted to play it with is dead or gone?

Sort of correct. Red Star OS has been in wide use for nearly 20 years now, but it is definitely not FOSS like actual Linux distributions.

We're closer politically aligned to Utah if you really dig into it.

Excuse me I happen to like you AND Stalin, thank you very much.

Okay, so:

Direct cremation is a very specific thing that morticians are obligated to provide, at risk of losing their license if they refuse. It costs less than a thousand bucks (but usually a lot less), and they don't make a lot of money off of it. So, they're unlikely to offer that service unless you use those specific words: DIRECT CREMATION.

What that means is your body is cremated, and your loved ones get your remains back in a plastic bag in a box. They can spread your ashes wherever you want. Or flush you down the toilet. But they probably shouldn't do that, because there's bits of bone in there and that would be really awkward to explain to a plumber. But you get the idea.

Funeral directors will attempt to take advantage of your family's grief to upsell them on virtually everything imaginable. I mean, you loved X, didn't you? Don't they deserve the best? They're monsters. When my brother died our parents were ready to hand over $15,000 to those ghouls for nothing. I intervened, and the same service they wanted was possible for around $800.

Fuck funeral homes.

Perhaps they enjoy scotch and cigars as well, maybe that'll... Ah, never mind.

Due to my still active non-disclosure agreement, I am prohibited from discussing what intellectual properties BioWare Austin are working on for release in 2011.

Oh no. Now we've done it.

I wear tankies when it is hot out.

I pirate things because crime rules. I stole a tiny pumpkin from a corn maze recently, that was cut into a THIN BLUE LINE ALL LIVES MATTER shape. Fuckem.

If you want to give a gift that's simultaneously very thoughtful AND a very shitty gift: buy him a pair of knee pads. Refuse to elaborate on why you bought them.

Exactly $148 would ensure my mortgage doesn't default next Tuesday. This is assuming I drink a bit of cooking oil.

I'll probably be fine. Whoever said crime doesn't pay was a bozo.

Ahh, hexb— MMPHMMMP MMMMPHHMP MMM!

I'm sorry, what? You need to take that boot out of your mouth if you want folks to understand you.