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I'm sorry bro cause I gotta hide this cause it's so bad but I appreciate the glimpse into what that place looks like

I also don't see how the first statement is problematic. To me it reads like they are encouraging their users to act with civility on other instances and keep the regular Hexbear stuff "to Hexbear itself". The statement explicitly tells users to instead debate users in other instances using citations. From where I'm at, this seems like the best way to go about ideological disagreements in the first place; it's certainly not a reason to defederate.

If, as you say, you're not a computer expert or anything of the like and are just starting to learn, Lemmy might not be the best place to start. If I were you I'd look into other self-hosted things that you can use for yourself so you can learn about security and so you can get comfortable with the process. Hosting Internet-facing services is a big risk that you probably don't want to undertake.

I also don't see how the first statement is problematic. To me it reads like they are encouraging their users to act with civility on other instances and keep the regular Hexbear stuff "to Hexbear itself". The statement explicitly tells users to instead debate users in other instances using citations. From where I'm at, this seems like the best way to go about ideological disagreements in the first place; it's certainly not a reason to defederate.