OP sounds like an R.E.M. song

I see a white pawn and I want to paint it black

White Queen redecorates her half of the board in hot pink to celebrate her newfound freedom, White King slips into alcoholism as his best bro Black King looks on awkwardly

Create a community especially for bot cage matches and restrict them to post there for the enjoyment of all

A little note from the OP, who is having some trouble updating and replying to this post due to federation issues:

kbinning at the office, eh?

legit

Time is like a flat circle Murph

It doesn't - your account only works on your home instance, but you can follow users on other instances.

holy nether*

Ra1 turns into a giant kaiju and kidnaps the white queen, and the black, blue, red, and green queens team up with rainbow unicorn knight to fight it Power Rangers-style

Use the Force, @awesome_person

There's a Lemmy community for PeerTube that might be a good place for content recs.

Black and white queens get tired of this bullsh.. and paint their half of the board pink

Earth has a pretty impressive rating tbh

No problem!