I have memories of different therapy words that my divorced parent and others used to disparage their exes in the 1990s. It's an awful circle. Nobody can just have normal conflict.

It's subscription based, but Nebula is creator owned I believe. Sucks though that everything free gets acquired by some extractive company.

Yes! Switching around naturally when it feels right is the way. No more shame, just following the brain signals where they lead.

No one's burying their head in the sand. They're reacting to the fact that it sounds here like you are resenting women for talking about their own oppression. It's not zero sum my friend. We know patriarchy hates men too. This specific article just wasn't really about that. There are other places on Lemmy that are talking more specifically about the issues you raise here, though.

I've installed a lot of things that say they work fine that don't, and I've followed a lot of 'simple' instructions that were not simple to me. I made this post to ask people about their actual experiences and get feedback from people about things I might not have thought of myself.

This forum is called no stupid questions.

Your last paragraph here is very important. There are massive political implications to these kinds of family and group dynamics.

We need an ecosystem of nontechnical tech forums for the rest of us. Real 'define every term' hours. I would start this if I knew enough.

Alas, it looks like none of the devices I own right now are actually compatible with Calyx, graphene or lineage right now. :( I own less popular models of devices, but I erroneously thought any android device would be interchangeable here when I first made this post.

So there is a fascinating historical rabbit hole here that I went down a few years ago. I think it is Nicole Rudolph who did a deep dive video into the history of bras and other shapewear. If you smoked a lot and like history I recommend it.
Bras and similar garments give the proper ‘shape’ for the clothes and cultural norms of the moment, and give people comfort and support if they need it. Lots of people need something sturdy to keep everything in place, but it’s also still a very grey area of social acceptance to choose not wear one.

Some folks here really seem to think that her fans don't have any political opinions without her. This is actually as much about her politically engaged fan base wanting her to use her platform for good, than it is about swaying people who might be very young or unsure about voting.

Lots of swifties are millenials who lean left and liberal and some have criticized her in the past for not speaking up or for leaving her views ambiguous in a way that left room for the right to coopt her image. This is not about silly pop fans needing to be told what to think. People aren't ignorant. It's exactly because she's powerful and very wealthy, that it's important for her to use her power to be very clear about where she stands. Especially in light of the ai thing and the Brittany Mahomes weirdness.

Disability rules are extremely obtuse and unclear to both social security workers and people who need the benefits. See also: this npr story about similar bs.. Fiscal conservatives seem to think that if they make these programs punitive and stressful enough then the people who rely on them will simply stop being disabled (or stop existing).

That just because someone treats you better than you’ve ever been treated before, does NOT mean that they are treating you WELL.

If you were bullied or abused as a kid, do some actual reading about what’s normal and healthy, and get out of a situation immediately if there are any even slightly concerning signs. No second chances, no guilt, no self blame, just go.

A sensible, too-little-too-late rule, probably full of carveouts and exceptions, that I nonetheless feel really relieved to see. Delayed and watery regulation is better than none, I suppose.

He’s not the man I knew. He doesn’t have the wisdom I thought he did.

The grief is really, really real. I’m so sorry. I feel this way about several people I grew up around, It sucks to realize people you respected aren’t interested in doing the right thing or even acknowledging reality.

This isn’t that far off from how existing u.s. policy about health and disabilities works in practice, though. There are some patchy safety nets (deliberately underfunded and full of glaring huge holes) but basically if you are not healthy enough to work and you’re not also very very very lucky in some other ways, “just die” is basically the indirect message you get. Disabled people do not actually have equal rights.

“You f–k with the president and the government, your security is not the same, and neither is your family’s”

See, this isn't good. I hate living in a society where embarrassing or contradicting those in power can change someone's life for the worse. Quiet part out loud though.

Pretty sure the normalization of sexual violence and harmful attitudes came from the adults in my life. If parents and teachers adequately teach kids to identify those things and know that they are unequivocally wrong, then teens who see unhealthy stuff in porn will notice and be critical of it. Probably indignant, too, since no one is more justice focused than a teen who has just learned something about the world.

The issue is backward ideas about relationships being reinforced by adults, either through active misogyny or just never talking about it. This argument boils my blood because the porn itself is not the problem. Awful attitudes about relationships and women start very early and they often come directly from parents themselves.

I really hope that it does.

Information that should be taught in school heath classes. It makes me queasy how often I have seen this from organizations and unscrupulous people in the wild. Happens a lot on campuses and wherever a lot of people are ‘new’ to an area or otherwise vulnerable socially. Predatory shit.

Ew. Fuck google

Yessss

I genuinely don't even know where to buy an affordable device that is free from this kind of control. Some company always has outsized control (and in some cases arguably surveillance) over anything you can find on the market. It sucks so bad.

This is the funniest thing I have ever seen.

I think a lot of people deep in linux and computer science communities might not realize that tons of people outside that subculture feel exactly the same way they do and want the same things, we just didn't go to school for it. No one is trying to water down the niche spaces that are important to people or deny the hard work that was done by people in decades past. We just want to understand and do what's been recommended to us, and information should be for everyone because the goal is increased adoption and digital freedom in society, right? Anyway this kinda means a lot coming from a person with your background so thank you.

I honestly think it’s about degrading the right to free expression. But yes also probably. The people who cast women and kids as pawns in need of protection are usually not super respectful to the real women/kids in their lives.

Heck yeahh

I 'downgraded' this year and realized what an upgrade having one of those was. We cannot cede those things.

This is the best advice here. Checkerboard pattern.

Edit: misread your initial point. Sorry! I think the main thing is talking to kids, giving them context and content warnings, knowing their maturity level and and letting them in most cases lead the way about what they’re okay with reading within reason, while answering their questions about sex, violence, relationships, etc. Kids tend to put back books they’re not ready for.

Fwiw, I am harshly critical of most elected dems but I have never considered not voting. I think I and many people hold our allies (for lack of better term) to higher standards and get angrier when they fuck up. So I think a lot of these posts are just that. Harsh criticism of a candidate =/= not voting for them. People are strategic about voting pragmatically, they’re just also very frustrated with the dem establishment’s behavior.

Appeasing them is dangerous. I see this line of thinking a lot, but it has never led the dems to victory and it has repeatedly compromised our own values and degraded trust in the party. We cannot and should not cater to the worst people in the room at the expense of our own morals. It is wrong, but it is also a losing strategy.

I bought this after for my switch after watching a playthrough and can’t wait to have time to play it myself. The writing is SO GOOD and so beautiful. Belongs on my bookshelf with all the other books. Just poetry, and all kinds of themes and resonances. Top tier

Good to know. Thanks.

Thank you!

Dystopian. You are a cafe!

I think ‘cute’ has developed a second meaning that is more in line with ‘stylish, aesthetically pleasing, clever’ than the ‘infant baby child/object’ sense of the word but I don’t know how to explain the difference. Probably the person’s other actions and intent and tone. Is someone being condescending in general, trying to frame someone as less than? Or is their body language/conversation style more geared toward a genuine expression of ‘i think you’re cool and like the way you look/your outfit or idea is nice’. I’m short and I get both - there is a subtle but very unmistakable difference between good cute and condescending cute. I feel the same way about ‘adorable’. The condescending usage of cute in my personal experience comes most often from women.

No. And while they are my family….also still no. I value my wellbeing.

Thanks for all this detail, I appreciate it!

Turn off history. It makes the homepage blank, and you will only see your subscriptions. But, there are still recommendations in the side bar you will have to ignore.

I blocked out the existence of bottle caps