At least here in a very anti-public transit US city: Automobiles

My best firing was from a job I got hired for at 16. Seasonal help for Victoria’s Secret in a local mall. This seems like a random detail, but makes the firing even funnier to me: VS (at least, this one) was bisected into the lingerie half of the store and the perfume/cosmetics half of the store. I was hired to work the perfume counter.

It was their holiday hiring push, so myself and a half dozen other women or so came in for a full day of group training—like get there ass early for hours of dumb safety/theft videos, paperwork, mock customer interactions & sales transactions on the POS, etc.

We finish all this up, and the trainer is congratulating us for being done as one of the managers is arriving for her shift. The trainer encourages us to introduce ourselves to the manager and each other & releases us for the day. I wasn’t shy, and was the first one to shake manager’s hand. She makes small talk and asks what scheduling preferences I had submitted. In response, I mentioned something about classes and she asks what college I go to.

When I laugh and correct her with the name of my high school, her face changes and she asks my age. “Oh, uhhh you can’t work here.” I am confused and tell her that I listed my correct information on the application. “Yeah, sorry, someone made a mistake. We only hire 18+ employees.”

To work the perfume counter. In a panties store. Meanwhile, 2023 me likes to periodically glance at Target’s growing sex toy selection (that is presumably stocked/rung up/at least VIEWED by minor employees) because it still feels novel. Victoria still had to mail me a check for training hours and can go fuck herself 😂

Surprised good sense of humor or wit aren’t on here yet. Playfully sparring with someone or laughing until it hurts when you hang around a person are a turn on.

Pager

It is so appreciated, thank you!

That’s a really good idea, I will absolutely do that!

If you loved it, you must play 2! It’s so good.

Oh I love that bold hatching technique! You are masterful with light and color. Love it.

This one pops into my head way too often

Thank you so much kind stranger! Hearing positive anecdotes helps and so does being heard! I really appreciate you taking the time to spread some kindness and compassion.

This is great advice and your kindness is so appreciated. Thank you for typing out such a supportive and compassionate reply.

Green Room

Not actually niche, but outoftheloop & eli5

Actually niche (and probably will never be recreated): askhistorians.

But also legaladvice, relationshipadvice, whatswrongwithyourdog, a million others I’m forgetting. (Just no spacedicks, its time has passed.)

My work allows dogs. I’d say there’s probably about 8-10 dogs that are regulars, most of which don’t come in every single day, but a few do. We’re hybrid, so at most they’re in office 3 days a week. There is a whole section in our handbook regulating bringing dogs in, so it’s not a free for all by any means. And people use common sense, I’ve yet to see someone trying to make it work with an ill behaved dog. I might hear a woof or bark on somebody’s way in maybe once a month.

It’s great! I love getting to see dogs at work! The policies we have are pretty explicit about keeping your dog in your office and supervised at all times (except for going in/out, or bringing them to meetings presuming that whoever you’re meeting with is comfortable with it.)

Idk if I have any allergic coworkers, but it’s not like I’m bumping into pups in the hall non stop, and they’re pretty good about accommodating various needs. I can’t imagine they would refuse someone asking for a different office if they wanted to move because the next guy over brings his dog often. The whole setup is far less dramatic than people might assume. It’s still a place of business, not a dog park.

A+ advice. I was not taught great conflict resolution skills as a kid and have some neurospiciness that makes regulation challenging at times, but my meds help and I think I’m better equipped emotionally these days than I tend to think of myself as or give myself credit for. Thank you for the advice, this is all A+ insight.

I believe you but the thought that Denver is worse in this department than where I am (Nashville) is baffling. It’s also horrible here, my area doesn’t even have sidewalks. :(

I was raised to know spinach as the awful canned stuff. Thought I hated spinach for years. Found out in my twenties I love it when its not garbage from a can.

You don’t have to get complicated, there’s a few key things in my experience:

Most importantly, sunscreen. One you will actually use every day. Formulas have gotten so much better in recent years, so there’s lots of great ones out there. When picking a sunscreen, the first choice is chemical or mineral. Personally, I live in the south and tend to run warm and sweat easily, and I have found that chemical formulas are fine on my body, but they get into & sting my eyes as soon as my face gets dewy in the heat. So I use a Supergoop! mineral formula called matte screen. It has a texture like those powder gel primers and a mild beige tint (minerals can leave a white cast.)

Cleanser: does your cleanser leave your skin feeling dry, greasy, taut, soft? Try different formulas-watery/micellar water, gels, cream based, oil cleansers, experiment until you find a good everyday cleanser, and one that’s good for washing off stubborn makeup.

Moisturizer: having a relatively light one for everyday use and a thicker or richer product for the occasions when skin needs extra moisture may not be necessary, but it feels that way for my skin. Which ones to use is a personal thing you can only learn from trial & error, but understanding your skin type and common issues will help guide you.

The only anti-aging item (other than sunscreen) that is evidence backed: Rx retinols. Don’t waste your $ on OTC retinol/retinoid products. If you want to try retinol, getting a prescription for tretinoin (or something similar) is pretty easy. (I used the Nurx app and dodged the annoyance of an in person visit.)

That’s pretty much it, unless you feel you need a toner. Masks, serums/actives, peels, these things have all gotten trendy, but they’re optional, and are best worked in after establishing the foundations above and learning what your skin isn’t going to react poorly to.

Really?!? And yet he’s having the sign illegally changed? This guy is wild

Thank you so much for the perspective and support. Intellectually, I get all of this, but last night I was just down in it ya know? I’m so glad I had a place to vent and that lemmy users like you were kind and compassionate. Thank you, truly from the bottom of my heart.

You are very insightful and so kind for reaching out to your wife on my behalf! All of this advice about communication is gold, and it’s so helpful for me to hear! Yes today has been better, and I’m getting choked up seeing all of these kind responses like yours. Thank you for taking the time! The world is a better place for people like you being willing to spread compassion.

You are right, and I thank you so much for this response. I probably would be acting a fool too if I were in that position, so I’m trying my best to be understanding and to put my own freakout aside. As hurt as I would be if something happened, that fear doesn’t at all compare to the fear one must feel when its their own body, wellbeing, and life.

And you’re right about the mom thing. He’s probably gonna be a handful when he wakes up sore and incapacitated by all this. I’m trying to not take it personally, which is hard because I’m sensitive in general and wish I could “fix it” for him. Obviously, I can’t, and his wellbeing is the priority right now. Thank you for the perspective from that side of things and for your message of support!

Yes! Best I can do is change a flat, but I grew up with a dad and brother that liked to tinker and that sub cracked me up.

This hits close to home. When I was candid about the fact that it took some courage to speak up about something that needed pushing back on, I got called a “scaredy cat” 🙄

I haven't yet, but yes thrifting will definitely be on the menu! Right now I'm trying to think through how I'm going to craft a couple of the pieces I aim to make and was hoping to find some costume specific sites to draw inspo from (and to start browsing for a wig and accessories.) There's just so many niche webstores selling junk product that my eyes were starting to cross.

You are absolutely right. Thank you for the perspective from the other side! I will definitely be there for him.

Thank you kind stranger! I already feel a lot better. He’s less crabby today and while we haven’t talked through what happened yesterday, I certainly don’t mind just dropping it until after he’s recovered.

Thank you for the context! This is all comforting

That’s fair! I’m just new to the fediverse and was initially worried about accidentally winding up in some veiled Parler weirdness. Definitely not the case, loving lemmy so far!

It recently saved me a lot of headache with finally ditching a subscription that the parent company made nearly impossible to cancel. After months of ignored emails and frustrating run around calls, I set up a virtual card, added it as a payment method, then deleted my real card info. The card was active for long enough for it to take as a legitimate CC, and then immediately closed. Those fuckers have emailed me (and snail mailed me) a million times trying to get me to update my payment method, lol.

Thank you! That genuinely makes me feel a little better

Mostly a new manager on our team causing issues (not my manager, half our team is her side of the org chart, my half of the team is a different skillset & manager.) She is not my bosses boss either. For some reason she is convinced she is both of those (boss of the whole team.) For context this is a very small team with full time focus on a special subsidiary co of one if my employer’s main clients. We are six people total, so theres no avoiding her. The rest of us do have and have always had a great dynamic and working relationship, but this woman respects nothing but the sound of her own voice, has no idea how to listen or compromise, doesn’t know wtf she’s doing, and thinks she’s going to bully everyone into doing things her way regardless.

If she has any experience in our industry, its very outdated. This does not stop her from being convinced she knows better on how this team works than all of us who’ve been on it for over a year. Lots of weird petty authoritarian control issues. Fixating on tardiness (its not a formal policy, but we work in a “younger” field and have always operated on a “as long as your deadlines are met, nobody cares if you’re running late” policy. This has become a whole crusade for her.

We have a short daily status call and try to all meet in person for it every Wednesday. She tried to insist these calls need to be in person everyday were in office (we hybrid.) Weve already pushed back on it, now she’s insisting these calls become video conferences 🙄 presumably so she can confirm we’re all at our desks on time.

Trying to make a lot of arbitrary (and sometimes counter productive) changes to processes shes not involved in, signing my half of the team up for ad hoc special projects from other teams for brownie points for herself, etc.

None of this would be so terrible if my actual boss weren’t utterly paralyzed by confrontation. He claims he’s biding his time until she really steps out of line, but I think he just has no back bone. Confronting authority figures (actual or imaginary as in this case she’s not my real boss) is stressful to me, but once I initially broach the topic, I do okay and keep it professional/constructive, so I’m trying to pick my battles because we’re all sick of being bullied by this idiot and I’m tired of waiting on my boss tk say something.

oh wow, this looks great! Thank you for the recc!

Thank you!

These links are excellent! Thank you!

Great advice

So I already pushed back on some of her unreasonable demands already, and essentially I’m trying to ready myself for more little skirmishes even though it scares the shit out of me. My boss has assured me she has no authority over me and the org chart shows that plain as day, I’m just not used to telling someone who is technically higher ranking than me no in polite and tactful ways when appropriate. This team has been such smooth sailing (interpersonally) up until now.

I am the “averse” one- meaning, I have a hard time setting firm boundaries, struggle with gathering the courage to say no, etc. The person in question I’m having to push back against is kind of passive aggressive/manipulative, but seems very confrontational.

But I’m very sociable amd not shy with conversation!

I can absolutely relate to this! Thank you for your perspective!