J.D. Vance Spends Weird, Low-Energy Speech Praising Diet Mountain Dew

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J.D. Vance Spends Weird, Low-Energy Speech Praising Diet Mountain Dew
newrepublic.com

J.D. Vance’s weird, anti-woke punchline fell flat at his own sleepy speaking event on Monday. 

Vance held a rally at his former high school in Middletown, Ohio, where hundreds gathered to hear the missives of Donald Trump’s newly-minted vice presidential candidate. But, even as a hometown hero, the Ohio senator suffered some brutally awkward moments. 

“It is the weirdest thing to me: Democrats say that it is racist to believe—well, they say it’s racist to do anything,” said Vance. “I had a diet Mountain Dew yesterday, and one today. I’m sure they’re probably gonna call that racist, too.” Around the room there were some scattered laughs.

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nuh uh According to my extremely conservative coworker, that stuff causes cancer and big soda is trying to kill us. Something like that

But then turns around to order snake oil and miracle pills from Infowars, then takes his daily hydroxychloroquine tab and rolling coal on some Tesla owner

And if you say maybe sugar should be taxed or banned, you’re a commie pedo