I can barely grasp where I am, please don't ask me any questions before I have some coffee

0x4E4F@sh.itjust.worksbanned from community to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world – 413 points –
5

Listen, I'm like an old computer. I need time to boot up in the morning. One hour should do it.

My wife likes to start full conversations as soon as my eyes open. I have to throw my hands up with a, "Too many words...."

I worked on a submarine as a messenger. We would carry orders and reports to officers for their review and approval. BUT my shift was around 4am and I’d find half the officers asleep, just to shove an orders packet in their face demanding a signature. I’m sure they”review it very thoroughly ten seconds after waking up.

"Sign it yourself man, there's a pen... 😴"