I grew up with cats, so my default is under.

I'm 42 and have known since I was 4 years old that I never wanted to be a mother. It's seriously one of my earliest memories - I didn't want to make my bed, my mother was exasperated with me and said "you'll be sad you treated me so badly when you have kids of your own"... and I remember being just appalled at the thought of being a parent.

I just don't enjoy children. I like peace, quiet, and order, and the freedom to do what I want without having to factor in children. Plus it looks super stressful to be a parent. I have 2 nephews and a niece, and while they're good kids, their parents always look so utterly exhausted and overwhelmed. And I'm definitely not good at being an aunt - interacting with children just doesn't come naturally to me.

Everyone told me I'd grow out of it. I had to fight to get my tubes tied in my mid-twenties (for real, I had to see so many doctors and had a botched Essure procedure at Planned Parenthood before I finally found an OBGYN who would take me seriously!).

No regrets rugrats!

I love Obvious Plant

The weird thing is that it's super commonplace over here, so lots of people do enjoy it. There are a lot of different kinds of potato salad and I'm betting the mega-Karen in the OP is referring to the kind that is pretty much just potatoes in mayo (which, for the record, is disgusting).

Maybe I'm lucky because I live near Pennsylvania Dutch country, but there's an abundance of good potato salad here.

No visible means of support and you have not seen nothing yet

Philly suburbs!

I chose to believe this is performance art

I haaaate Teams. Worst thing ever to happen to workplace productivity. And (unless this has been fixed since I retired) chat history isn't persistent past 6 months so you lose your proof of what was discussed, unlike email.

Cudney, Ezekiel | w m 59 | Farmer

----- Ann | w f 45 | wife | keeps house

----- Alfred | w m 21 | son | work on farm

----- Catharine | w f 15 | daughter | does as she pleases

Some things I've noticed in my early 40s:

• You talk about things like property taxes and 401k contributions more often than you ever thought would be possible
• You seriously weigh whether a drink is worth the bad sleep and headache it'll cause you
• Your pop-culture references are lost on younger folks
• You start referring to college-aged people as "kids"
• You need reading glasses but you're in denial about it
• Injuries take longer to heal
• Those of your peers who haven't taken care of themselves are starting to have serious health issues
• You care more about flossing, skincare, fiber, and hydration
• You still rock bottom eyeliner like you did in high school
• You've seen fashion from your high school years go out of style and then come back as "retro"
• You see the utter confusion on your nephew's face when you explain that you used to keep a quarter in your bike pouch in case you needed to call someone, because he doesn't remember a time before cell phones and his generation isn't allowed to just roam around unsupervised on their bikes
• You have strong opinions about things like laundry detergent brands
• Birds become fascinating
• You have no problem spending a few hundred dollars on a new kayak paddle, but the price of cold cuts these days is just unacceptable

Just off the top of my head:

• If It's at all possible, retire early! Look into FIRE (Financial Independence, Retire Early)
• Carry as little debt as possible
• Max out your 401k (otherwise you're leaving money on the table!), build a savings account, and maintain at least 6 months' expenses worth of cash in an emergency account
• Where you can, plan ahead for large purchases (e.g., vacations, new roof) and make them in cash instead of financing them
• Minimize consumption of goods to maximize financial power (i.e., don't get sucked into lifestyle creep!)
• Do spend money on things that are high-quality and will last
• Lift heavy things often
• Don't skip cardio
• Hydrate!
• Use sunblock (physical >>> chemical)
• Get your routine medical stuff (e.g., mammograms start at 40), even the uncomfortable ones (colonoscopy!), and don't wait until minor things become major to get them checked out
• Be calm, rational, and intentional in your interactions with others, and if you've behaved poorly, give a heartfelt apology. This is especially important with your significant other.
• Pay closer attention to your parents' needs - they are aging and will start to need help they may not be willing to ask for
• Don't be afraid to remove bullshit from your life. That one "friend" who you never want to hang out with because they just drain your energy? It's OK to let that friendship go.

I don't have kids so no advice there.

Mmmhmm, yup, yeah, wait...wut??

What the christ dude.

I'm sorry, what?! Who the fuck in 2022 thought "You know what we need? A statue of one of the most hated women in recent history!"?

Sorry, but how can you body shape shame my beautiful lady?!

Because that bot will remember your politeness and take pity on you when the robot uprising comes.

Like any place, there are pros and cons, and since I've never visited, I haven't been exposed to enough to form a proper opinion. However, here are some of my thoughts:

• The culture seems to appreciate intricacy and beauty, with rich colors, complex spicing of food, and gorgeously detailed textiles. Minimalism seems anathema on an aesthetic level.
• The Indians I've known have mostly been very warm, kind, patient, pragmatic people.
• There is a worrying divide between the sexes, which IMO is unhealthy and contributes to sexism, sexual assault, and loneliness. I don't get it because you guys invented the kama sutra!
• I'm not sure why this is, but there seems to be a huge tolerance of unsanitary conditions. We've all seen footage of people wading in horribly polluted rivers, or beachfronts covered in trash and human poop, or filthy public bathrooms covered in feces or period blood. Same goes for unsafe conditions - massively overloaded trains, deadly chaotic traffic, etc.
• It seems to me that it must be hard to get ahead in a country with so many people because there's a massive amount of competition, plus limited opportunities. I think this is why Indians are some of the hardest working people I've ever met, and also why some of the Indians I've known are willing to undercut the next guy to get ahead.

Bro either see a doctor or clean up your diet. That amount and frequency of smelly flatulence is not normal.

Finding a nudie mag in the woods

I mean, I understand how the law works and everything, but from a very pragmatic perspective, how is there even a soupçon of doubt at this point? Having a trial for this really feels more like we're asking "which side has craftier lawyers" rather than "did he actually incite an insurrection". It seems so silly.

(I hope this makes sense, I'm a little high.)

OH SO YOU HATE AIRPLANES????

Oh snap

I wish we would all be Humans first.

Let's be real though. If 3 million women a year encountered men and only 2 got raped, we'd never have come up with the man-vs.-bear scenario in the first place.

Tell a joke or story in a linear fashion. I'm always fucking up, or realizing halfway through that I've left out an important detail. It's how my mind works but I'm sure it's frustrating to others. Plus I just get flop sweat sometimes.

I'm not OK. I'm not super un-OK, but this time of year puts me in a dark mood.

I promise I'm not trying to be edgy in saying this, but I fucking HATE the holidays. Everybody puts so much pressure on things being a certain way, especially because it's a religious holiday. I'm atheist, my mom is catholic, my dad is Jewish but agnostic, and my husband's family is some sort of Protestant. I wish I could treat it like a secular holiday, but my mom wants me to go to mass with her, my MIL wants us all to sing carols (fucking why, life isn't a Hallmark movie!), and a polite "no thanks" doesn't cut it, so no matter what I do I'm disappointing someone. I've gotta negotiate with both sides as to whose house we're visiting on each day, and I just don't know.... Every year the stress just gets to me, I can't wait for the holidays to be over. I count down the days until the 26th. The cold weather and lack of sun don't help either.

Also. I just turned 42 this week. Every birthday I've ever had has been xmas-flavored - I can't escape it even for one day. I have a labral tear and femoroacetabular impingement in my right hip which need to be fixed surgically and have been making it really hard to squat and deadlift. And despite being diligent with sun protection, my dermatologist removed yet another mole - this one came back as "moderately precancerous" and they need to do a larger excision. She also suggested I get laser treatments to remove a few age spots on my face. I feel like I'm too young for any of this shit.

I just want a pause button.

Personally I'd be sad to see Beehaw go. I enjoy several of your communities and I think the wider fediverse would be poorer for it. But you need to do what's best for you. Best wishes to you no matter what you decide ☮️💙🙂

Wow, you have really pretty eyes!

I have a few!

• Vaporwave minidiscs
• Nail polish & nail art
• Skincare
• Fitness over 40
• Greyhounds

Look at dose birbs!!

I know it's not as expensive as some others here, but a basement window. I was a latchkey kid, and one afternoon I'd come home from school and taken the dog out for a walk. When we got home, some neighborhood kids showed up and we were playing in the backyard with the dog, and I didn't get around to unlocking the house. And then somehow I lost my keys. I knew my folks would be furious with me for goofing off and losing my keys rather than doing my homework, so I was laser focused on getting inside the house. I took a pipe and broke a basement window, planning to climb inside, let the dog in, and then find a way to fix the window without my parents knowing. (I don't remember what I was planning to do about the lost keys.) And of course, the minute I broke the window, they pulled into the driveway and saw what was going on, and I was grounded for like an eon after that. I'm in my 40s and they still bring it up now and then. My dad replaced the windowpane himself but he was too grumpy to show me how, lol.

Overall, it's a pretty stupid story!

Heyo! I had no idea it was International Women's Day until my trainer told me this morning. My husband just left for a weekend trip so it's just me and the doggo tonight. I'm going to make a marsala and probably watch a bunch of Doctor Who.

Happy International Women's Day!

Congrats!

I disagree. A theoretical exact middle is a single point within the n-dimensional space that describes mindset. In reality, there's a pretty wide swath of what's considered "normal"; it occupies a volume in that n-dimensional space.

These teefs cannot be contained.

TV, not a movie, but Spike from BTVS. I mean, come on!

She is super adorable, old dogs are the best 🩶

• Pepsi Kona
• McDonald's Arch Deluxe
• Orbitz (always thought it was gross but it looked fucking cool)

I hear ya, but I don't mind - it's a discussion thread, after all! - and it's interesting to see a different perspective than my own.

I'm rewatching DS9!