Putin says we must think how to stop 'the tragedy' of war in Ukraine

runiq@feddit.de to Ukraine@sopuli.xyz – 208 points –
Putin says we must think how to stop 'the tragedy' of war in Ukraine
reuters.com

I'm honestly hesitant to post this here, but… the absolute ludicrosity compels me. How? How does he have the gall to say something like that? He ought to burst into flames on the spot.

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Tutorial: How Putin can stop the tragedy of war in Ukraine

  1. Pull troops out of Ukraine.
  2. Jump out of highest window in Moscow.

And pay reparations to Ukraine before jumping out of that window.

2 Isn't realistic

He'd never jump, it'd be an accidental fall with 2 gunshots in the back of his skull.