we've updated our terms of service, you're now opted in to everything, good luck!
And
Yes, you unsubscribed from that mailing list, but before you did we went and put your name down for 575 new email lists which you have not unsubscribed from.
Unsubscribing from this mailing list automatically signs you up for this other identical mailing list
Unsubscribing confirms this is a monitored account, so we have sold your email address to 9 million other companies.
That first one should be punishable by flogging. Also the second one, but the first one is a very common strategy for opting you in to things you explicitly opted out of, and I'm pretty sure it's illegal. But, since no one ever enforces the law against mega corps, they're free to operate with impunity.
And
Unsubscribing from this mailing list automatically signs you up for this other identical mailing list
Unsubscribing confirms this is a monitored account, so we have sold your email address to 9 million other companies.
That first one should be punishable by flogging. Also the second one, but the first one is a very common strategy for opting you in to things you explicitly opted out of, and I'm pretty sure it's illegal. But, since no one ever enforces the law against mega corps, they're free to operate with impunity.