Do you actually care about your friend's new baby, vacation abroad or similar life events or are you just being nice?

ContrarianTrail@lemm.ee to No Stupid Questions@lemmy.world – 213 points –

Because I don’t, and pretending to feels dishonest. I’ll listen if they want to talk about it, but I’m not going to act interested, and I certainly won’t ask about it on my own. What I’m trying to figure out is whether people actually care, or if they’re just playing a social game that I’m simply not interested in.

I’m probably on the autistic spectrum, which likely explains this to some extent. But that’s not an excuse - being an asshole is perfectly compatible with autism, so before dunking on me, please realise I probably agree with your criticism.

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Very, very, VERY few people actually care about other people's kids. And that interest only goes up slightly when they are related to the child.

Nothing wrong with you feeling that way.

As for vacations, life events, etc., I'm interested in knowing what goes on in my friend's lives... that's kind of what having a friend is about.

BUT... I'm interested in hearing about these things face to face. I couldn't care less if they're just social media spam about what they did with their spouse. That's one reason why I stopped using social media.

I dunno. I always ask my friends what their kids are up to and am interested to hear. It's usually entertaining or enlightening. I love talking about my kid and most parents are the same way. Tho I have a few friends who don't feel comfortable talking about their kids for various reasons so I don't ask them.

Totally agree, when it's on social media, I don't care at all about it, just another thing to upvote and scroll on by

If I'm talking to them, whole different story, because then it's more personable

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