What is the best answer to "Sell me this pen"?

vis4valentine@lemmy.ml to Asklemmy@lemmy.ml – 103 points –
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Just cross your arms, smile wryly, and comment on how pathetic the Interviewer's pen is. Cheap material, runny ink, a grip that's painful to hold. Wish him good luck in taking notes on subsequent interviews.

Then lean in, and say "But, you know? I've got a premium writing utensil. It's crafted in the Netherlands by a Space Age engineering firm. It's designed to fit comfortably between your fingers. And the Indian ink that runs through it glistens and glides smoothly through a specially crafted tip."

Pull out a business card with absolutely beautiful handwriting on it. Just as he expresses surprise and interest, sigh and say "But... It's really not for you. It's really more of a thing for your boss, or your boss's boss."

Start getting up to leave, and wait for him to come running after you.

Only downside is that, according to The Game, his pen will inevitably want to sleep with you after all that negging

God, that book sucked. I read it out of curiosity, but it was trash.