" The excess funds initially allocated for the purchase will be reinvested into our philanthropic efforts that include business school scholarships for promising cult leaders, a charity that donates elections to at-risk third world dictators, and a new pro bono program pairing orphans with stable factory jobs at no cost to the factories."
This article is great top to bottom but 'at-risk dictators' made me cackle
The Onion isn't news.
What's this doing here?
Edit: OH! The Onion actually, really, genuinely, bought InfoWars! OK I get it.
This is not satire.
The linked announcement is satire. And hysterical.
But the acquisition is also real.
He ate... uh, no... uhm he saw an apple that looked like an onion... and uh... peeled it.
Yeah I don't know how to make the analogy work here.
"the hapless owner of InfoWars (a forgettable man with an already-forgotten name)"
We've been joking that reality is so absurd that the Onion is just a news site now...
Satirists have often been the last line of defense for journalism. It makes sense, think how handy the “it was just a joke” defense has been for the worst people. We are still at the stage of our decline where that can work. Soon enough, nothing will be funny at all.
Is it part of the joke that the logo for “Global Tetrahedron” is actually a dodecahedron?
" The excess funds initially allocated for the purchase will be reinvested into our philanthropic efforts that include business school scholarships for promising cult leaders, a charity that donates elections to at-risk third world dictators, and a new pro bono program pairing orphans with stable factory jobs at no cost to the factories."
This article is great top to bottom but 'at-risk dictators' made me cackle
The Onion isn't news.
What's this doing here?
Edit: OH! The Onion actually, really, genuinely, bought InfoWars! OK I get it.
This is not satire.
The linked announcement is satire. And hysterical.
But the acquisition is also real.
He ate... uh, no... uhm he saw an apple that looked like an onion... and uh... peeled it.
Yeah I don't know how to make the analogy work here.
"the hapless owner of InfoWars (a forgettable man with an already-forgotten name)"
We've been joking that reality is so absurd that the Onion is just a news site now...
Satirists have often been the last line of defense for journalism. It makes sense, think how handy the “it was just a joke” defense has been for the worst people. We are still at the stage of our decline where that can work. Soon enough, nothing will be funny at all.
Is it part of the joke that the logo for “Global Tetrahedron” is actually a dodecahedron?
Can’t wait for Leon Musk to eat that candy bar.