Water is wet

I was so disappointed at the concert I went to. Instead of the sternum punch, she pushed a homeless person down a flight of stairs.

Quick, let's pass a law to let the sea turtles conceal carry!

After reading the article, the Panera guy is actually saying it doesn't make sense to expect store level employees to care about shareholders and that execs should recognize that most employees are just trying to make enough money for themselves.

Not saying he is better/worse than other CEOs, but the article title is misleading in that he is speaking out against other CEOs that have this opinion.

[Everyone] enraged at [any company] for injecting ads into the middle of [everything]

I wouldn't mind $5 if that tier didn't also cap the number of searches to 250. I'd burn through that super quick, and $25 for unlimited is way too much IMO.

"Look up bro"

Soda price increases have done wonders for my health.

Yeah he speaks for the extremely vocal minority

Yooo hooo

all hands

hoist the colors high

No Lara, that would be your father in law who's doing that.

"lol" said Apple "lmao"

Pot. Kettle. Black.

Nixon died in 94

I wouldn't dream of touching private property.

Needed to make sure it wasn't a watermelon

Did you go to school somewhere in the Midwestern US? Everyone I know who has even heard of euchre is from there (mostly Indiana).

I think this would cause anyone who used to be a "meat and potatoes" person to relapse.

There's always money in the pillow stand.

These are all really funny, but I think sith lord and secret santa are funniest to me.

Here's one I got with the same prompt. I'm pretty impressed by the results actually.

Yeah, could you imagine if he was half as cool as they make him look in these?

Anecdotal, but my grandma who is very racist and conservative was confused why he was running because only natural born citizens can be president. Needless to say she was disappointed when I told her that he was born in Cincinnati.

It's stainless steel, not rustless steel! /s

When has Wall Street ever thought more than 10 minutes ahead?

I don't like the way my skin feels on my body

Here I'm pretty sure

https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/unbothered-moisturized-happy-in-my-lane-focused-flourishing

My first smartwatch was a fossil and it almost made me give up on smart watches entirely. It was pretty nice for the first 6 or so months but the battery deteriorated quickly and it only lasted like half the day. I didn't even last a whole year before I gave up on it and just assumed Android smartwatches were kinda trash.

I actually got the free pixel watch 2 promo deal for preordering the pixel 8 pro thinking I could just sell it, but I decided to give it a shot and I actually really like it.

I'm still incredibly angry at Disney+ for gutting watch together. I have a Plex server that I use quite a bit that I suppose will be getting even more usage now.

Thank you for all of your effort on this. Adjusting to rapid growth is a huge challenge, and we all appreciate the effort you and everyone else is putting in to trying to make this instance run smoothly.

Manning the pan?

Delaware

Doesn't hate them, just wants them to hide away and never encounter others. Perfectly reasonable /s

Also Deep Cock Galactic

I do this too. I feel like I help others all the time but I don't want to ask for help because I don't like other people doing things for me. Definitely not a healthy mindset.

Absolutely not

Water is wet, more at 11.