You guys have one chord and think you can record an album.

“I’m giving 10 people one million dollars if the can pass House Appropriations Bill 5031.662.7H!”

Like the emoluments clause matters any more. He can just collect his salary after he leaves office, as a treat.

I’ve started signing them all up for each other’s mailing lists.

You know who else would make a fine leader for these great united states?

If we clone harambe, will things get better?

I feel you strongly misunderstand the financial position of a lot of americans. They buy what they can afford, and would love a cheap new option in the market.

Pastafarianism is not only real, you can demand to wear your colander in a driver photo as an expression of your beliefs.

I agree the headline isn’t accurate to NASA’s statements, but I also feel everyone is weighing whether there is something we don’t know.

Aptly put.

ACAB

10.0.2 fixed coveting of cattle to match other items in coveting domain

I pay my electricians $50 and almost never make them stand next to anything on fire.

I have a laptop where half the keyboard doesn’t work and the mouse gave out, but my full paid Acrobat works, so I keep it.

Trump looks so tired, why do they keep forcing him to run?

Given the ballooning costs of the program, a helium leak is fitting.

I worked at a company (as briefly as possible) where an advisor came in and did this. He started listing off who we actually needed to pay on our rotating debts and who we could put off and how long. When I left, within 3 months several very important vendors were calling asking if I could do anything to help them out. I told them if they stopped sending supplies that would probably help the process.

Why are you booing her, she’s right.

As a paramedic, if you can't remember your name, address, and social security number, we'll take you to the hospital but you probably won't get a bill. Unless you tell the hospital, then we'll get a face sheet. Stay Safe, John and Jane Doe.

Study is done by "TheFire.org," which is described as a competitor to the ACLU.

I know... why do we need a competitor to the ACLU?

Well, per Wikipedia: "FIRE has been described as a competitor of the ACLU. In 2021, the organization had an annual revenue of $16.1 million. FIRE has received major funding from groups which primarily support conservative and libertarian causes, including the Bradley Foundation, Sarah Scaife Foundation, and the Charles Koch Institute."

Oh Charles Koch, you scoundrel.

We need an attack ad: "Why are some republicans afraid of russia?"

“You’re under a rust!”

“How do you keep a surgical staff in suspense?”

I own my own company, I am the sole employee. I win all the company raffles, it's great.

This is now my favorite potential cause of WW3.

Mark Cuban is a bit of a wall street asshole, but he’s created a drug company to slash the prices of generic drugs for Americans: https://www.npr.org/2022/01/24/1075344246/mark-cuban-pharmacy#:~:text=Billionaire%20investor%20and%20Dallas%20Mavericks,of%20its%20online%20pharmacy%20Wednesday.

What was really needed was a good guy on fire.

Let's stick with the iron in your hemoglobin for some more weirdness. The body knows iron is hard to uptake, so when you bleed a lot under your skin and get a bruise, the body re-uptakes everything it can. Those color changes as the bruise goes away is part of the synthesis of compounds to get the good stuff back into the body, and send the rest away as waste.

In the other direction, coronaviruses can denature the iron from your hemoglobin. So some covid patients end up with terrible oxygen levels because the virus is dumping iron product in the blood, no longer able to take in oxygen. I am a paramedic and didn't believe this second one either, but on researching it explained to me why these patients were having so much trouble breathing on low concentration oxygen... the oxygen was there, but the transport system had lost the ability to carry it.

I personally respect her for setting the example by not tempting men.

Is a “chicks with dx” joke acceptable here?

You guys have one chord and are convinced it’s a song.

The article says 102,700, to save you all the ads ads and pop ups.

America has become such a shit show that a common moral act is seen as heroism.

Working at the onion must be so. hard. right now

“Donald Trump will kill ‘at least seven prostitutes’ while in office.”

No… how about “Donald Trump sings the entire National Anthem on key.”

“Donald Trump finally unmasked as secret santa in Harlem children’s program.”

Wait… I think I unlocked a secret.

Is it insider trading if wsb members short the stock, then make controversial content that frightens investors away?

An unknown number of hardened criminals are still at large.

I’ve got to admit, a girl makes that face at me, I’m going to walk up and start explaining the plot of Krull (1983) for as long as she can hold it. If she makes it through the whole thing I’m pretty sure we’re legally married.

Do you see how the mountain range coming up from the south starts to splay out and there’s a giant lake?

In 1999, to the south of that lake where that large valley is, Viggo Mortensen broke his toe kicking a helmet in Lord of the Rings.

After about 26 it doesn’t matter much any more.

It feels like you think the things you said are against raising the minimum wage, and I strongly recommend you read your own post again.