goldteeth

...Think it's too late to get a refund?

Yeah, I mean, not really, if I'm honest.

Both are still showing up full price for me, if that helps.

Weirdly, season 4 of both Fringe and Eureka have a portion of the main cast shunted into an altered timeline and having to reconcile their original memories with their "new" histories, to varying degrees of success.

Travelers kinda inverts the premise in its second season, where a bunch of time travellers sent back to fix the past start seeing their superior foreknowledge slowly rendered useless by the fact that their mission is actually succeeding in changing the future.

Thank god, for a second there I thought they meant "cracking down on people dodging Windows 11 by intentionally disabling TPM," like I've been doing. False alarm, carry on.

this is the weirdest political compass I've ever seen

"Djinn", specifically, being the correct word choice. We're way past fun-loving blue cartoon Robin Williams genies granting wishes, doing impressions of Jack Nicholson and getting into madcap hijinks. We're back into fuckin'... shapeshifting cobras woven of fire and dust by the archdevil Iblis, hiding in caves and slithering out into the desert at night to tempt mortal men to sin. That mythologically-accurate shit.

So not only has he quite literally decimated their readerbase but he's also made every other newspaper run the story that they were going to endorse Harris anyway, instead of likely just limiting that information to the handful of Washington Post subscribers that cared enough to check. Great quash, Jeff, you really shut that one down.

Shit, an emulator getting taken down for... actual copyright infringement? You don't see that every day.

Hell I have yet to see him have worth.

Mar-a-Lago, Palm Beach, Florida

Holy shit. I've figured it out. I've cracked the master plan.

"Um, excuse me, stolen classified documents piled high to the rafters in my bathroom? I believe that's the New York attorney general's bathroom, athankyouverymuch. Case dismissed!"

This makes the fairly generous assumption that the man is capable of planning, but whatever.

Ted Cruz can be more than one thing. Don't pigeonhole Ted Cruz.

Once had an order arrive on-time, but the tracking information never got updated and kept telling me the package was "running late" and pushing back the expected delivery date, and then after like a week of that they just said "sorry, it's been delayed indefinitely" and gave me a refund. For an order I'd already received. And I mean, I wasn't gonna be the one to tell 'em they were wrong.

"Now now, Batman, you should know that when a little pest like you dances with the Bug Zapper... He'd better be ready for a shock!"

"Security footage shows several ne'er-do-wells in domino masks fleeing the scene with a number of burlap sacks, clearly-marked with bright green dollar signs, no doubt containing the compromised data. AT&T security suggests the culprits must have 'jimmied open' their servers with a crowbar, or perhaps a bundle of dynamite detonated via plunger from a safe distance. One suspect is currently in police custody after attempting to escape through a tunnel painted on the side of a brick wall. More on this story as it develops."

“Oh, this new post already has a comment, let’s check it out! … Dang it!”

That's pretty much my gripe. One time I saw a post with maybe six, seven comments, opened it up, and they were all either the bot, or replies to the bot.

And even if you block the bot the post still shows up as having comments. So you'll open up a post boasting the aforementioned six or seven comments expecting to find a lively debate, or at least a wisecrack about global affairs, and leave with a bunch of tumbleweeds and the lingering knowledge that somewhere, two or more people are arguing with a machine about whether or not it thinks the newspaper is any good.

It would be very out-of-character for him to just now try to distance himself from the morally reprehensible, so I'm going to assume he simply forgot the man existed the moment he left his field of view.

I mean I can certainly understand where the confusion may have come from.

To say nothing of the whole, y'know, "grafting experimental hardware directly into peoples' brains" thing.

Yeah but those don't usually go unsolved for 150 years and it seems very unlikely that any of the British historians involved in this project would be able to make enough meaningful changes to the American sociopolitical landscape to offer any help on that subject.

Beyond that, it also just runs way worse; new.reddit takes at least twice as long to load a page than old.reddit. And when your entire business model is based on exploiting my stunted attention span to trick me into reading advertisements, you can't give me that extra two and a half seconds to realize maybe I don't give a shit about half the garbage I just mindlessly scrolled through, or else I'm gonna just go, like, fly a kite or something. And I don't wanna do that, where do you even get a kite?

And hell, it's entirely possible this rate limit isn't just restricted to old.reddit, but nobody's noticed yet because new.reddit is too slow to make 100 requests in a measly 10 minutes.

"Alright, that's it! It's super-duper double-dog war times infinity, no backsies!"

Doctor Ruth died in-between those two; we're onto a new set of threes now.

There's always old reliable, "that thing over there"

I mean... Five minutes before the slap, he was sitting in his front-row seat at an internationally-televised award ceremony where he had just been nominated for two of the most coveted honors in cinema. I dunno if he was that bad off.

Might've even scuffed up the rocks, jerk.

Obama's spicy dijon mustard...

What, just now?

Someone, somewhere has evidently misinterpreted the fact that US presidential candidate Kamala Harris (pictured center) is of Indian ancestry - as in her family is from the country in south Asia - and instead photoshopped her into the stereotypical Native American "Indian" aesthetic. Why they have chosen to do this eludes me.

And why do we bake cookies but cook bacon?

I was gonna make some joke like "is one of them 'being pressured into taking out a predatory loan at age 17?'", but then I went to actually read the article, missed the "Continue Reading" button, and mistook the list of "Trending Now" links at the bottom of the page for the qualifying factors... I was very confused as to why:

1. Your 50-year-old mom building a $1.3B startup
2. Being a 29-year-old making $125,000 working in tech without a bachelor’s degree
3. The value of bitcoin being 'halved', or
4. Nvidia stock prices soaring over the past 5 years

Would qualify someone for debt forgiveness. Hell, I was confused why your billionaire mom would let you take out student loans to begin with. I thought billionaires loved nepotism. And who's this guy with student loans without a bachelor's degree? Needless to say, I had assumed the whole administration had lost its mind.

("being pressured into taking out a predatory loan at age 17" is not, explicitly, one of the 17 factors.)

"Complicit in faking the moon landing/covering up the Flat Earth™" are the obvious ones. "Space cadet" always a classic. These, being the low-hanging fruit, I think will be the ones we'll see the most going forward, but I'd still like to throw my hat in the ring:

"An astronaut? You mean those guys that get off on flying their little rockets out of the atmosphere so they can breathe bottled air for a week? Like some sort of oxygen cuck?"

(obviously this implies a repubican pundit using the word "atmosphere" in a complete sentence, so I think we're safe)

And if, heaven forbid, it's not either of those, it is now apparently acceptable to refer to it as a "clap back." In the newspaper of all places.

I know for a fact I've said I was going to "Xerox some copies" on a machine that was almost certainly not manufactured by the Xerox Holdings Corporation.

I only purchased this toothbrush because that was the only way to get the water-resistant Entertainment Center/Speaker/Corporate Surveillance Device for the one room in my house that is the least comfortable, has the worst acoustics, and has the strongest expectation of privacy, and also I can't just put a regular Alexa in like a plastic bag or something because I blew my plastic bag budget on a fucking app-controlled toothbrush or whatever the fuck this is supposed to be, jesus christ

I've had nightmares containing the phrase "Vice President Shapiro" and I'd like to avoid having that image in my head for even just the split-second it takes me to disambiguate the two.

Also the other guy's been to space, so.

Despite its name, so-called kidney disease is rarely caused by an overabundance of kidneys

The following is a tremendously disproportionate analogy given that we're talking about a microblogging website, but I really don't think there's any better term for it:

It's really less like you're calling Twitter by its deadname and more like you're refusing to call it by its slave name. Twitter didn't come up with this on its own, some guy just rolled up and said "I'm changing your name because yours isn't cool enough." Like, fukken Kunta Kinte.

Again, very unfortunate that that's the only comparison that comes to mind but I'm really blanking on anything else. Jean Valjean, I guess. Maybe Darth Vader. Locutus of Borg.

Yeah skimming it very briefly, it looks like your instance doesn't even show bot indicators, so, no way you could've known really. But there should be a button to turn it off somewhere in your user settings, probably down near the bottom.