Conflating farting loudly on purpose with voting for Trump is really unfair for those of us who fart loudly on purpose. My farts never took away the right to get an abortion.

Buy a few Republicans and let's make it happen, Billy Boy.

Try to train a human comedian to make jokes without ever allowing him to hear another comedian's jokes, never watching a movie, never reading a book or magazine, never watching a TV show. I expect the jokes would be pretty weak.

I'm in the other camp. The first time I squeezed my 155m spaceship through the tiny mouth of a rotating space station in VR, I wept like a baby. (An Anaconda in Elite: Dangerous)

They also lost the science war.

"Fewer." - Stannis Baratheon

Finland: Greeting each other?!?

Wasn't it like, last week that Republicans were screaming that we were grinding up toddlers to make stem cells?

You know, whenever a kid gets accidentally shot, I think of all the other 359x359 directions the bullet could have gone and wonder how many millions of stray shots are flying around.

I've only looked at the front page a couple of times since the blackout. It seems to have degraded significantly. I have no idea if that's confirmation bias or the reality of the situation.

They'd be voting to expel him not because he's corrupt, but because he's embarrassing. Weirdly, they don't seem to be embarrassed by Trump.

You're forgetting the pre-Web internet: 99% students & academics. It was largely awesome. When you did get trolled, it was by someone who could spell and form a cohesive argument.

I'm going to throw out 2 series that were canceled early that I'm still salty about: The River that was on track to rival Lost in quality, and Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles which is another case where Summer Glau got screwed. Lena Heady has said if SCC didn't get canceled, she wouldn't have gotten Game of Thrones, which hits a lot different now than 10 years ago when GoT was good.

Republicans' effort to count fails after they run out of fingers.

They had to get to Golden Corral before the dinner rush.

I saw this headline a couple of times, and tried unsuccessfully to work out the metaphor. Finally googled it:

A company with no moat has either no advantage or one expected to dissipate relatively quickly.

Nothing more permanent than a temporary solution.

Bad variable names and then awful "temporary" log lines... I feel attacked this morning. ;)

But his arrest fueled outrage among party activists.

TBF, the sun coming up in the morning fuels outrage among GOP activists.

Hoosier Terrorist gives Florida Man a run for his money.

ESR: "Every good work of software starts by scratching a developer's personal itch."

It could be lifesaving in those rare occasions that you accidentally call the teacher 'Mom.'

Not so much of a joke as a cute story. There was once a programmer with a dog named Biff who would bark at the mailman every time he delivered the mail. The programmer wrote a program to monitor incoming email and beep when you got a message, and named it biff.

Saw XI takes a whole new meaning in China.

The DA figured it out: if you want to shut Trump up, just show him your Pecker.

Inkscape and GIMP as alternatives to Illustrator and Photoshop.

They named the bill wrong - it should be Kids' Act for Online Safety- KAOS.

Damit, lolled at a restaurant like a maniac.

"withdrew all ground troops" ... "one brigade remains."

A 2021 survey by the Public Religion Research Institute found that 23% of Republicans believe that “the government, media and financial worlds in the U.S. are controlled by a group of Satan-worshipping pedophiles.”

I'm torn between thinking "Well, Marx didn't think of that" and "it's predictable that during the death throes of hypercapitalism the proletariat may get a bit fuzzy-headed."

Why buy jurists if you're not going to use them?

This is a pretty Halloweeny topic. Which is scarier: a fake priest or a real priest?

So, I'm no chemist, but if H2O is already oxidized, what do you call it when you make hydrogen peroxide - H2O2?

Three fiddy.

Do you want Hannibal Lecters? Because that's how you get Hannibal Lecters!

Once the body of that first billionaire hits the floor, they're gonna start dropping like flies.

At the time he died, I'd been a fan of Douglas Adams for about 25 years. After he died, they released a collection of essays, works in progress, notes and such. In it, he described the amazement he had for his favorite author, who he described as having an amazing way with words. The guy that amazed me with "It flew in much the same way a brick doesn't." was amazed by someone else's way with words. So, I put down Salmon, walked to the nearest bookshop, and bought a couple of volumes by P.G. ( if I may call him that) Wodehouse and began a new era of fandom that rivals my adoration of dear old Doug.

Oooh, do the other members of the nightshade family now: peppers, tomatoes, potatoes....

School board is the lowest level of government that I've observed narcissistic nazi psychopaths. Well, the lady at the counter at the driver's license place, too. But she's not elected.

I get the disintegration qualms. But slap some TNG-era biofilters on that baby and filter out heavy metal accumulations, budding cancer cells, chest congestion, etc., and I'd be first in line.