Programming Languages as Essays

Inductor@feddit.de to Programmer Humor@programming.dev – 564 points –
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C#: did you just copy Java's essay and put your name on it?

COBOL: why it looks like it's from 16th century?

PHP: I did not ask for a spaghetti recipe

alternative Rust: it's great, but I asked for an essay, not "🔥 Blazingly fast rust-based EssayOS"

C# is Java in good

C# is Java except from Microsoft, which means it's designed and much more integrated with Windows. The official .net core even brings telemetry right out of the box. Using C# apps on Linux is a pain, which is very bad considering it's supposed to be like Java - compile once, run anywhere - except Java actually achieves it.

Also, Minecraft runs on Java. Therefore, C# is useless. Boom, destroyed /s

Untiy games are programmed in C#

So point for Java

True. F Unity, I prefer C/C++ with eg. Raylib. (Fr tho, I hate not having direct control over my whole code.)

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Rust v3: "It's three hours and I'm still compiling dependencies"

EDIT: Also, "What does Option[Arc[Mutex[BTreeMap[String, Box[RefCell[Box[amp mut F>>>>>>> where F : Fn(T) -> U in your essay mean?" (srry, I didn't come up with a better obscure data type, it's probably gibberish)

EDIT2: Lemmy deletes 'less than' sign for some damn reason (time to build Lemmy at home?)

My friend partially explained how the build safety system worked for Rust and my first reaction was "holy shit the link stage must take a century".

"Yes."

I don't think you should criticize a language that you clearly have not even learnt the syntax of. Dependencies are also a one-time compile and linking just your own program or library does not take very long, and if you've ever worked with C languages it's all the same.

Just because you don't know how to read a languages syntax doesn't mean it's bad, it's just like how you have to learn anything else. Rust is quite self-explanatory afterwards.

I do write Rust projects

EDIT: Well, it depends. If you statically compile everything with C build systems, in that sense, the speed should not differ from generic cargo workload. Although, in most cases, projects written in C are dynamically linked due to several reasons, one of which is code speed. In practice, even huge projects written in C (30k to 10k LOC) build quicker than C++ or Rust.

I'm not pooping on generics, either. Generics is a saviour for correctness and performance. Yet, I want to point out the type creep is still a thing, even though there's little we can do about it.

Anyways, this thread should be better interpreted with humor, instead of technical accuracy.

Fair, I just don't like it even when it's humorous as it still speaks of a language in a bad way.

Also, if you use a Unix system to build your projects I can recommend you check out Mold if you haven't yet as it speeds up the linking significantly.

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