Choose wisely!

Wolf Link 🐺@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world – 943 points –
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(shamelessly stolen from an imgur dump)

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8 and 9.

I figure I can either make bank lending the anthropologists/archeologists a hand with an extinct language, or at least have a bunch of fun bringing it back to life as a personal hobby.

And really? No one's picking nine? Have any of you seen Albert Einstein's calves? He biked regularly. If it turns out I can outrun him now, that won't always be the case as my sedentary ass ages.

No matter how crap my skeleton becomes, I'm giving myself an automatic default level of movement that isn't all that shabby

Albert Einstein is dead. You couldn't run at all.

  • steal corpse of Albert Einstein
  • hook it up to exoskeleton
  • make it run E=mc^2^ miles per hour
  • take the pill

Problem?

make it run E=mc^2^ miles per hour

You just converted the energy of Einstein's corpse to mass. It increases in weight by a billionth of a gram or so and you're now paraplegic.

Also, you failed high school physics.

/sorry

Or they just converted the mass to energy and can run at relativistic speeds. Which sounds cool until you understand that the equations involved in that would include things like "probability of fission" and "blast radius".

Pretty sure that was intended as troll physics.

This doubles as a sick burn if it wasn't intended as troll physics

Tbf, it says you can run as fast as Einstein, but it doesn't say you'll have the same endurance

Probably because you can just take teleportation instead

Bedridden, trying not to attract the attention of the government as I slowly teleport my 99yr old fail body a couple inches at a time towards the bathroom instead of being able to get up and jog.