F.B.I. Tells Passengers on Alaska Flight They May Have Been Crime Victims
nytimes.com
Passengers aboard an Alaska Airlines plane that made an emergency landing after a fuselage panel blew off this year have started to receive letters from the F.B.I. identifying them as possible victims of a crime.
The letters are a sign that a criminal investigation the Justice Department has opened into Boeing, the manufacturer of the 737 Max 9 jet, is ramping up.
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From the headline I thought some agent just jumped up in the middle of the flight and announced there had been a crime like some cheesy cop show.
"Quick, do you have a structured settlement and need cash NOW?"
"CALL J.G. WENTWORTH -- 877-CASH-NOW!!!!"
I T S
M Y
M O N E Y
A N D
I
W A N T
I T
N O W
Was this the most successful ad campaign for something most people never even think about?
If we go by Lemmy and Reddit metrics, then absolutely 😁
That ultra-whiney "now" at the end is just a perfect way to cap it off 🤌🤌
I know, did the passengers catch mesothelioma?
I don't think they've used asbestos in airplanes for at least a couple of years.
The lights go out and when they come back on, the whistleblower is dead.
Detective: A crime has occurred and every passenger on this plane is a suspect! No one may leave this plane!
Boeing executive panicks, grabs a parachute and kicks the door open