Pick your Lemmy instance wisely...

jarfil@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world – 232 points –
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It’s a safe space and the fediverse rapidly expanded tenfold. Beehaw has stated outright that they want to refederate with the big instances, but are delaying until mod tools improve enough to allow them to maintain their safe space for their gaggle of vulnerable folks in the wake of the severely increased workload.

That's nice and all, but "join our instance" and "we're defederated from the other two biggest instances" are in direct opposition to each other, doesn't matter what excuses you use.

Only if you don’t think about it are they not mutually exclusive ideas. Safe space first, increase size of safe space second.

Unless you use a client with multiaccount support

Safe space, or echo chamber?

Gotta love how spending time with like-minded people has now been framed as an "echo chamber." I blame reddit, since that's where I first encountered this nonsense.

I'm fine with my "echo chambers." We are able to have really in-depth, adult discussions about things like LGBTQIA issues, mental health, and politics without having to constantly swat away a bunch of sea lions.

Had to look up "sea lion." That's something I've seen a lot of, but never knew there was a specific term for.

Yeah, it's sadly ubiquitous. I don't think a day goes by when I don't witness several sea lions in the wild

Tucker "I'm just asking questions" Carlson must be the poster child for them.

I've been running into something adjacent, but doesn't quite fit that description. Basically people use the tactics of Sealioning but the motivation seems to be just reframing the conversation to whatever they wanted to talk about, rather than necessarily pissing you off. It can be just as annoying though.

Yeah, that wouldn't count because they're just being a standard asshole who wants to control the conversation rather than trying to troll with bad faith questions.

Sealioning is an accusation that rests on assuming someone else's intentions. You can't ever know for sure if someone is a sealion, because people aren't mind readers. I usually see sealioning accusations thrown by neurotypicals at autistic people, because they can't read our emotions like they're used to and that freaks them out and they assume hostile intent.

Yes, it could be mistaken for that if a person isn't paying attention. But the difference between acting in good faith and not is usually pretty obvious as it goes on.

Well that's a tremendous amount of faith in your ability to read other people's minds. And given you make no distinction between reading the minds of neurotypicals and autistics, I'd bet good money that you're frequently wrong when you try to read autistic minds. Which would make your actions towards autistic people frequently cruel.

Autistic mind here: Reading yours is giving me a headache. It's like debugging a minecraft mod after patch day. Please reset aggression level to zero and run a malware scan.

Yeah, I'm neurodivergent in a lot of different ways, and every one of them reduces the efficacy of neurotypical empathy. That sensation you're experiencing right now from talking to me is the same way neurotypical people feel when they talk to you. No wonder neurotypicals are so ableist to autistics, talking to us causes them pain. But it's still not right for them to demand we think like them, and it's still not right for you to demand I think like you. What we have to learn is how to coexist together.

And any coexistence we reach isn't going to involve always assuming we can read minds effectively. It's just an unrealistic standard.

Anyway, maybe it wouldn't hurt so much if you weren't trying to read my mind without consent. No means no, but you didn't even ask. No wonder you're in pain, you tried to delve inside my mind and I kicked you back out.

You do realize that associating with primarily people who share the same views or values as you is literally an echo chamber right?

Sometimes people want to have a conversation without someone with the username DMmeYourNudes wanting to debate them.

That's an echo chamber lol.

No, it's a community of people discussing things that they know a lot about.

You're basically going "Oh, you don't want the pigeon to join your chess tournament? Are you scared it will outplay you while shitting on the board?"

Yes, because everyone who joins beehaw has a doctorate or is a verified expert in their field lol. It ain't that deed dude. The exclude people because they don't want to be told their views are wrong regardless of the truth. That's an echo chamber.

Nah, especially for stuff like LGBT issues, it's likely the beehaw users are a lot more informed than the average lemmy user.

It's actually impossible to have a normal conversation about LGBT issues or left of centre politics with people like you being obnoxious and shitting all over the chessboard.

Nope. That term is only used by sea lions and shitlords. It's one of those terms like "virtue signaling" that immediately lets you know the person has less to offer society than a common housefly or roach.

I argue with fascists, exclus, medicalists, and sexists all the time and I've never met a sealion. But I have met neurotypical people who expect their sense of cognitive empathy to work on neurodivergent people, and then project all sorts of BS onto them for having a different opinion. IME that term is a dogwhistle for ableism.

EDIT: Just looked up Beehaw's guidelines and apparently it's against the guidelines to accuse someone of sealioning so maybe Beehaw isn't so bad

You've never spent any time on reddit, I take it?

That's a whole colony of sea lions.

Lucky you, but I encounter sea lions all the time. People like Tucker Carlson and Ben Shapiro have formed entire careers around sea-lioning.

Well see, sealioning is feigning ignorance, and it's a simple fact that bigots really are that ignorant. I've never met anyone who understood progressive issues and still disagreed, except for amoral people who chose to have little investment and wouldn't bother to engage in sealioning. This idea you're proposing that there are people who pretend to be ignorant doesn't make any sense to me. If they are acting like foolish bigots, I choose to believe them.

It’s literally a safe space, you absolute sea lion.