Gorillas are actually very gentle unless provoked by overpriced footwear or long lines for cheap beverages

SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world – 1133 points –
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Gorilla might come at you because fuck you. Mamba is scared shitless of you.

Yeah, just stay out in the open away from places a snake might hide so that you don't accidentally scare one, and the Mambas should be fine.

Yeah my son has gotten really into snakes. They reallly just want you to leave them alone. Good thing too since they can move at 12 mph

12mph is coincidentally the speed my bowels would empty if I saw a black mamba coming at me at that speed.

Amateur, I can make my bowels empty faster than 12 mph in recreational settings.

There are hidden hallways behind the shops, if you can get back there the gorilla won't ever find you. Hell go to the elevator or a bathroom and just chill for a day.

Gorillas are some sneaky motherfuckers. That's the first place they'll hide waiting for you.

They may be, but it's still terrifying to find out one was sleeping in your bed springs after you found one on your windowsill the night before.