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callmepk@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world – 608 points –
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None of which makes sense without the context of what a enormous jackass Buckley had famously been in online spaces for YEARS. It's not just that loss was a weirdly serious addition to a silly comic, it's that it perfectly encapsulated the kind of sanctimonious self-important attitude Buckley espoused and instantly turned his shitty online persona into a joke.

I don't know if it is genuinely possible to still appreciate loss the way it was without all of the enormity of that context.

I think Cyanide and Happiness did a good job encapsulating your point and why everyone clowned on it at the time.

https://explosm.net/comics/dave-tim-actually-said-this

And as the image title implies, Tim actually said this.

This is just one example of the kind of shitbag Buckley was notorious for being

I used to feel this way but ultimately, what happened was tragic, even if it happened years prior. He expressed it publicly and some folks probably felt “seen” at the time. That’s a good thing. Talking about/hearing stories of trauma and loss and grief can be very empowering for folks who have experienced their own.

Like don’t get me wrong: yes he was (is?) all those things you described. No he was not a model messenger for this story. But that was a serious loss and I think at some point folks need to recognize that we’re all human and maybe we shouldn’t attack someone working through the loss of their child. Even if we feel they don’t deserve to express themselves that way.

Maybe I’m missing elements of the story but I guess I’ve just never been able to square why it needed to be this ruthlessly mocked. It’s been like 15 years.

Man, at this point some sociology student could probably write a dissertation just on the cultural context of this comic alone. Both the stuff you're talking about regarding de-stigmatizing talking about trauma (and miscarriage in particular), and the way the comic itself has been meme-ified and distilled down to representations as abstract as ".:|:;"

I see your point and don't entirely disagree, I'll just its hard to feel bad about somebody suffering the consequences of their own actions (not the miscarriage obviously, but the reaction to it).

You don't really get to complain about feeling alone when you're the one that burned all the bridges that lead to your house, imo.

Maybe so but I’d still help them.

_“10 percent of any population is cruel, no matter what, and 10 percent is merciful, no matter what, and the remaining 80 percent can be moved in either direction.”_ -Susan Sontag

Thank you for being part of the merciful 10%.

I’d say that is too generous of praise but thank you. I try to be part of the merciful 10% for sure. Never heard of this before but I really like it

It isn't overly generous, you yourself said it, "...I'd still help them."

I'm glad you like the quote, thank you again for living it :)