Some good ones have already been covered, so I'll add that, if I were to break down crying, other women would come over to ask if I'm okay etc. (I've held a complete stranger while she sobbed in the middle of a store, after she lost everything in a fire) unfortunately men still face a very weird gender bias that society in general still believes - you never show your emotions.
This seems to depend on age and social circle. I'm very proud of my son's group of friends. They're considerably more emotionally supportive of each other than me and my friends ever were.
I agree, kids especially are far more empathetic and I'm glad to see it. The kids are alright! 🎶
The kids are alright
In some ways. Not so much in other ways.
Not only do I feel like it's a terrible idea to show that weakness, but if I actually do it everyone around me will reinforce why I shouldn't.
Views really need to change. We're all human and crying is a normal human response! Sucks you're surrounded by people who feel that way 😕 it's not a weakness at all 🤍
Views do gotta change, but it's not like crying isn't showing a weakness. It is showing weakness. The problem is life is a competitive environment where you're not allowed to compete in any way other than financially where you're at the same disadvantage as a gambler in a casino.
It really isn't. Having emotions is not weak. Pretending like you don't is weak. Expressing the emotions you have, processing them, letting them move through you, and moving on productively is not weak, it is strong. Shoving them down and the having them come out in other nonconstructive ways is not strong, it is avoidant. Allowing yourself to have emotions despite the judgement of others does not make you vulnerable, it means you are healthy and self-assured enough to support yourself emotionally.
Anything I do because I have to rather than because I want to is a weakness. A need is a weakness. It's a vector of attack that I've gotta defend. Crying isn't something I want to do, but is compulsive.
Sure. Though you could argue that needing food, water, and sleep is a sign of weakness, too.
Simply existing automatically comes with these "weaknesses", so I don't see the point in assigning them with a negative value, as your perspective seems to. I doubt many people would claim that not drinking water is a sign of strength. Why should crying be any different?
Now, having a mental breakdown because you haven't allowed yourself to feel your emotions, though? Or lashing out at others because you haven't learned how to regulate yourself? Now, that's about as emotionally and mentally weak as you can get.
Not needing to eat would definitely be a huge strength.
Having a pawn attack a square near your king is a weakness. Being an air hockey player should mean that doesn't matter.
Crying IS the mental breakdown. It's what you do when you need someone else's help because you can't do it yourself(weakness).
The problem here is that people prey on you when they see that weakness, and a civilized society should not do this. The problem here is that we're developing all of the tools for a civilized society and putting them into the hands of predators. A weakness is only a problem when it's being exploited. This is why I oppose usage of things that give our predatory "leaders" leverage against us that we can't escape. Surveillance bad. Censorship bad. Detention bad.
It's not a weakness at all, but you seem determined to believe it is. Having healthy coping mechanisms isn't weak, bring able to process your emotions rather than pushing them aside is healthy and indicates maturity, not vulnerability.
I don't know hope you're coming to any of your conclusions. What do you think the word weakness means? Also coping.
Crying in front of a woman has got me dumped a few times, like next-day dumped.
I'm sorry. That's so shitty. I really don't get women who are like that. The ability to express emotion (in a healthy way) is one of the most attractive traits one can have, imo.
My AMAB (and non-binary, though they didnt realize that until like 9 years into our relationship) partner has cried in front of me COUNTLESS times. Because they're a fucking human being who has feelings. It's really not hard to understand if you take even just one moment to empathize.
Your... What?
Likely assigned male at birth
Wow that's really shitty, I'm sorry that happened to you. I agree with @lady_maria@lemmy.world's comment, it's a very attractive trait for a man to express emotions in a healthy way.
Fuck those people who expect you to have no emotions. Red relationship flag if I ever saw one - they didn't think of you as a person, just an idea.
One of the most impactful things my wife said to me was "it's okay to not be okay".
Some good ones have already been covered, so I'll add that, if I were to break down crying, other women would come over to ask if I'm okay etc. (I've held a complete stranger while she sobbed in the middle of a store, after she lost everything in a fire) unfortunately men still face a very weird gender bias that society in general still believes - you never show your emotions.
This seems to depend on age and social circle. I'm very proud of my son's group of friends. They're considerably more emotionally supportive of each other than me and my friends ever were.
I agree, kids especially are far more empathetic and I'm glad to see it. The kids are alright! 🎶
In some ways. Not so much in other ways.
Not only do I feel like it's a terrible idea to show that weakness, but if I actually do it everyone around me will reinforce why I shouldn't.
Views really need to change. We're all human and crying is a normal human response! Sucks you're surrounded by people who feel that way 😕 it's not a weakness at all 🤍
Views do gotta change, but it's not like crying isn't showing a weakness. It is showing weakness. The problem is life is a competitive environment where you're not allowed to compete in any way other than financially where you're at the same disadvantage as a gambler in a casino.
It really isn't. Having emotions is not weak. Pretending like you don't is weak. Expressing the emotions you have, processing them, letting them move through you, and moving on productively is not weak, it is strong. Shoving them down and the having them come out in other nonconstructive ways is not strong, it is avoidant. Allowing yourself to have emotions despite the judgement of others does not make you vulnerable, it means you are healthy and self-assured enough to support yourself emotionally.
Anything I do because I have to rather than because I want to is a weakness. A need is a weakness. It's a vector of attack that I've gotta defend. Crying isn't something I want to do, but is compulsive.
Sure. Though you could argue that needing food, water, and sleep is a sign of weakness, too.
Simply existing automatically comes with these "weaknesses", so I don't see the point in assigning them with a negative value, as your perspective seems to. I doubt many people would claim that not drinking water is a sign of strength. Why should crying be any different?
Now, having a mental breakdown because you haven't allowed yourself to feel your emotions, though? Or lashing out at others because you haven't learned how to regulate yourself? Now, that's about as emotionally and mentally weak as you can get.
Not needing to eat would definitely be a huge strength.
Having a pawn attack a square near your king is a weakness. Being an air hockey player should mean that doesn't matter.
Crying IS the mental breakdown. It's what you do when you need someone else's help because you can't do it yourself(weakness).
The problem here is that people prey on you when they see that weakness, and a civilized society should not do this. The problem here is that we're developing all of the tools for a civilized society and putting them into the hands of predators. A weakness is only a problem when it's being exploited. This is why I oppose usage of things that give our predatory "leaders" leverage against us that we can't escape. Surveillance bad. Censorship bad. Detention bad.
It's not a weakness at all, but you seem determined to believe it is. Having healthy coping mechanisms isn't weak, bring able to process your emotions rather than pushing them aside is healthy and indicates maturity, not vulnerability.
I don't know hope you're coming to any of your conclusions. What do you think the word weakness means? Also coping.
Crying in front of a woman has got me dumped a few times, like next-day dumped.
I'm sorry. That's so shitty. I really don't get women who are like that. The ability to express emotion (in a healthy way) is one of the most attractive traits one can have, imo.
My AMAB (and non-binary, though they didnt realize that until like 9 years into our relationship) partner has cried in front of me COUNTLESS times. Because they're a fucking human being who has feelings. It's really not hard to understand if you take even just one moment to empathize.
Your... What?
Likely assigned male at birth
Wow that's really shitty, I'm sorry that happened to you. I agree with @lady_maria@lemmy.world's comment, it's a very attractive trait for a man to express emotions in a healthy way.
Fuck those people who expect you to have no emotions. Red relationship flag if I ever saw one - they didn't think of you as a person, just an idea.
One of the most impactful things my wife said to me was "it's okay to not be okay".