And why would you be ridiculed and scorned for opening up emotionally?
because people are mean and repeat the mean things that have been done to them, and difficult emotions make people uncomfortable and one way to avoid them is punishing people who do open up
I do not have the experience of being punished for opening up. Who has punished you for it?
You're starting to sound hostile towards people who suffered
No, I just don't understand it.
The vibe you're giving is "I didn't experience that, so you must be confused.'
Okay? But I literally said the opposite of that?
No, you didn't
And as far as I can tell, the only one here being hostile would be you.
Your evidence is... the comment i responded to? Not very compelling. It doesn't feature you giving any sympathy, just saying you don't get it. And the implication thus far is that you simply can't conceive of it happening. Not the most empathetic stance, is it?
It reminds me of the guys that claim sexism no longer exists, asking "but where is there any sexism?" And then shooting down all examples as not counting, continuing to ask "where is this sexism?"
Well then I guess it's good that I'm not asking for sympathy. Just an explanation. Thankfully, people other than you were kind enough to give explanations.
I have no idea why you thought I claimed you were looking for sympathy. You must not have actually read it properly. I said you are not giving sympathy. And yeah - I didn't give you an explanation, exactly because other people have. That's kinda the point I was making - others have already explained it to you, and your bewildered "oh golly gee, people aren't that mean!" attitude struck me as resisting to believe people can actually be so cruel. Not just aghast at it, but refusing to actually believe they are telling the truth and not just mistaken.
not literally punished, but socially responded to negatively. I've been lucky that I haven't experienced it much (and even then, I still struggle to open up), but it's a very real thing. For men, one umbrella term that includes this concept is "toxic masculinity"
Yeah, I guess all I can say is I've been lucky too. I've just never noticed any serious repercussions for showing my emotions. All I can think is that, since I was a pretty unpopular kid growing up, I gave so little of a shit about what the sort of people who would think negatively of me opening up emotionally would think about me that I just didn't notice it even though it was happening. It would have just been one more dickhead move to ignore.
My parents and school teachers and peers made it very clear to me that if you show emotion such as sadness, jealousy, frustration, fear, or anxiety, you were not living up to being a male and thus are weak and deserving of punishment, physical violence, and social isolation and ridicule.
Where did you grow up? That was absolutely not my experience as a kid in Indiana.
Upstate New York
Maybe it's different there, I don't know. Or maybe it was a different era? I grew up in the 80s and I just never have gotten that sort of impression from the people around me and I am not one to hide my emotions.
It was the early 2000s. Teachers would say things like “you’re acting like a girl, show everyone you are a man” and whatnot. Guess you got lucky and I’m glad to hear it.
Sigma > Alpha now apparently, Alpha is the new Beta
why would you be ridiculed and scorned for opening up emotionally?
Not to sound like a blue-haired liberal, but at least in my neck of the woods, toxic masculinity is to blame. Like, one of my favorite internet folk got bullied off the internet recently for saying he likes girls a little too enthusiastically. Some dudes will absolutely tear you apart if you are a man that exhibits anything other than stoic passivity.
Like, one of my favorite internet folk got bullied off the internet recently for saying he likes girls a little too enthusiastically.
I honestly can't even wrap my head around that. He was bullied off the internet for being heterosexual?
The blue haired libruls saw it as objectifying women
The chudly cuckservstive types saw it as an effeminate man being gasp not MANLY enough
And JoCats Fans sit back and wonder why everyone's so fucking butthurt at a goddamn little parody of "Boys"
I had to Google it and what came up seems to be it's basically a lone wolf but worded by people who also use terms like alpha male.
I may be wrong though.
The alpha male gets rebranded every time once the previous rebranding gets ridiculed to death. Can't wait to see what sigma male gets transformed to
Not really, it was supposed to be a person so above the "alpha beta" bullshit, not caring about how people perceive them, that they wrap around the "spectrum" in front of "alpha". It was meant to be a comedic / sarcastic way to rebuke toxic standards, but it was assimilated into the general "philosophy" of it.
What is a "sigma male?"
And why would you be ridiculed and scorned for opening up emotionally?
None of this meme makes sense to me.
There's plenty of people that are relunctant to open up to others because they are scared of their reaction. I am one of them.
because people are mean and repeat the mean things that have been done to them, and difficult emotions make people uncomfortable and one way to avoid them is punishing people who do open up
I do not have the experience of being punished for opening up. Who has punished you for it?
You're starting to sound hostile towards people who suffered
No, I just don't understand it.
The vibe you're giving is "I didn't experience that, so you must be confused.'
Okay? But I literally said the opposite of that?
No, you didn't
And as far as I can tell, the only one here being hostile would be you.
Your evidence is... the comment i responded to? Not very compelling. It doesn't feature you giving any sympathy, just saying you don't get it. And the implication thus far is that you simply can't conceive of it happening. Not the most empathetic stance, is it?
It reminds me of the guys that claim sexism no longer exists, asking "but where is there any sexism?" And then shooting down all examples as not counting, continuing to ask "where is this sexism?"
Well then I guess it's good that I'm not asking for sympathy. Just an explanation. Thankfully, people other than you were kind enough to give explanations.
I have no idea why you thought I claimed you were looking for sympathy. You must not have actually read it properly. I said you are not giving sympathy. And yeah - I didn't give you an explanation, exactly because other people have. That's kinda the point I was making - others have already explained it to you, and your bewildered "oh golly gee, people aren't that mean!" attitude struck me as resisting to believe people can actually be so cruel. Not just aghast at it, but refusing to actually believe they are telling the truth and not just mistaken.
not literally punished, but socially responded to negatively. I've been lucky that I haven't experienced it much (and even then, I still struggle to open up), but it's a very real thing. For men, one umbrella term that includes this concept is "toxic masculinity"
Yeah, I guess all I can say is I've been lucky too. I've just never noticed any serious repercussions for showing my emotions. All I can think is that, since I was a pretty unpopular kid growing up, I gave so little of a shit about what the sort of people who would think negatively of me opening up emotionally would think about me that I just didn't notice it even though it was happening. It would have just been one more dickhead move to ignore.
My parents and school teachers and peers made it very clear to me that if you show emotion such as sadness, jealousy, frustration, fear, or anxiety, you were not living up to being a male and thus are weak and deserving of punishment, physical violence, and social isolation and ridicule.
Where did you grow up? That was absolutely not my experience as a kid in Indiana.
Upstate New York
Maybe it's different there, I don't know. Or maybe it was a different era? I grew up in the 80s and I just never have gotten that sort of impression from the people around me and I am not one to hide my emotions.
It was the early 2000s. Teachers would say things like “you’re acting like a girl, show everyone you are a man” and whatnot. Guess you got lucky and I’m glad to hear it.
Good times, noodle salad.
Sigma > Alpha now apparently, Alpha is the new Beta
Not to sound like a blue-haired liberal, but at least in my neck of the woods, toxic masculinity is to blame. Like, one of my favorite internet folk got bullied off the internet recently for saying he likes girls a little too enthusiastically. Some dudes will absolutely tear you apart if you are a man that exhibits anything other than stoic passivity.
I honestly can't even wrap my head around that. He was bullied off the internet for being heterosexual?
The blue haired libruls saw it as objectifying women
The chudly cuckservstive types saw it as an effeminate man being gasp not MANLY enough
And JoCats Fans sit back and wonder why everyone's so fucking butthurt at a goddamn little parody of "Boys"
JoCat likes girls, and people hate him for it. There are plenty of videos going around talking about the situation in further detail
I had to Google it and what came up seems to be it's basically a lone wolf but worded by people who also use terms like alpha male.
I may be wrong though.
The alpha male gets rebranded every time once the previous rebranding gets ridiculed to death. Can't wait to see what sigma male gets transformed to
Not really, it was supposed to be a person so above the "alpha beta" bullshit, not caring about how people perceive them, that they wrap around the "spectrum" in front of "alpha". It was meant to be a comedic / sarcastic way to rebuke toxic standards, but it was assimilated into the general "philosophy" of it.
So basically it's all bullshit anyway
It's like Alpha+ then
Alpha Pro Max Plus