I'm buying frozen pizza from now on rule

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Or someone slapped their cock on it.

Look for the guy with a burnt cock.

after doing this multiple times you build up a resilience

no no no, mandatory taste tests to see if the cheese can be detected

I don't think so, the way the displaced cheese is thicker by the presumptive tip means that at best someone slid their cock on it!

This is the root cause analysis we live for.

I'm trying to imagine putting my dick in cheese that is hot enough to be moved around to that degree, and I don't think it would be very comfortable.