Foster Care is TERRIBLE for kids. Only the most severe cases of abuse and neglect should cause removal. In these cases adoption should be looked at because the instability of foster homes causes measurable damages
Apparently everybody before 1800 was a bad parent.
“You don’t have have air conditioning, it’s not safe for your kids to be here!” - someone in 1800 probably
Goodness, I wonder what's different about the climate since 1800...
Are you suggesting children in 2024 should not be allowed to be reunited with their parents unless those parents can afford air conditioning?
Ah yes, I forgot we still live in 1800s. Also people back then were not fine and had all sorts of mental issues. Taking the kids away is of course the wrong move, but often might be the only way so parents improve. But a child deserves it's own bed and room. Also get reunited with their parents asap once condition improved.
1800s? Siblings share rooms all the time today. Many, many, many children growing up right now in the United States are sharing a room with their sibling. I have no idea why you think this would be abnormal.
Moving the goal post. Siblings sharing is not the same as sharing the room with their parents and even the bed. Also 1800 said the guy before me, that's not my take. I also didn't say that siblings sharing a room is abnormal. You said that.
I'm pretty sure you are the one moving the goalposts here since this is about keeping parents from having access to their children because of issues like that, as the linked article discusses.
You are unable to read and your incompetence is rude too, because you only learned to twist words but not to understand. Why did they lose their kids to begin with, huh? Because of no own room. Also do you read what people commented, under which I replied to, which then changes the topic slightly? The discussion is in context and not what you think it is. People who are smart, are able to talk about multiple things in one thread. I also already said on multiple places, that they should've got back their kids asap. Your brain skipped that part at least twice.
Quote
DFCS wouldn’t let them stay there unless she had at least one for her daughter and another for her sons, she said.
She has trouble with providing space for her kids, so later them getting older, in their late teens, requiring more space, will once again cause issues. Pretty logical why they didn't give custody back to her, as she'd create another case in a few months/years. No that's not good for the kids.
Insulting me doesn't change the fact that you claimed that siblings sharing a room causes mental illness:
Ah yes, I forgot we still live in 1800s. Also people back then were not fine and had all sorts of mental issues. Taking the kids away is of course the wrong move, but often might be the only way so parents improve. But a child deserves it’s own bed and room. Also get reunited with their parents asap once condition improved.
So sure, you said they should get their kids back, but at the same time claimed that more than one child to a room causes mental illness. So you're being pretty inconsistent unless you think parents should be allowed to make their children mentally ill.
Also, it's kind of weird that you're accusing me of being rude when you're the one doing the insulting...
In the room with their parents will likely cause issues, especially now with the growing control freek parents.
And later when they are almost adults, sharing a room with siblings, might to a lesser content, cause issues. Brother and sister, will cause a lot of stress. But hey, some call that positive.
The biggest issue is sharing it with parents, because some still believe beating their kids is fine and if the kid can't even hide inside their room and lock the door, they are full out lost. I thankfully had a door to hide from my manic abusive mom. Fuck whoever says their own room isn't required. Also siblings can be bullies and abuser too, just saying.
Many, many cultures the world over involve parents and children sharing the same room. Are they all mentally ill?
And your argument that kids should have their own room because of abusive parents is an argument against abusive parents not in favor of every child having their own individual room. It also has nothing to do with not having that room causing mental illness unless you think indigenous people from Indonesia to Alaska are making all of their children mentally ill and always have.
If parents are abusing their kids, take the kids away from them. That is what causes mental illness.
Also siblings can be bullies and abuser too, just saying.
They can also be very supportive and sheltering if their sibling is being abused by a parent and the siblings share a room. Or did you not consider that? Maybe it's not as cut-and-dried as you think and you're transferring your own, admittedly terrible, experiences on the world?
I had my own room when I grew up but I didn't have a lock on my door. I never felt I needed one and if I had one, I never would have locked it. My parents weren't abusive. If our circumstances went bad and I had to share a one-room apartment with them, they wouldn't have abused me then either. So why would I have needed a lock on my door?
My parents grew up in homes with 3 bedrooms and 5-6 kids. They made it work and it wasn’t considered a problem back then.
My mother and her family grew up in New York City apartments, which were usually one bedroom. She and her brother slept in the living room.
Bunk beds have existed for a long time, not that big a deal.
Nice and what about the kids that did develop issues because of that? Do you not count them because you personally were totally fine with it?
Edit: I'll take the downvotes, because you guys know nothing about mental illness, a healthy child life and psychology. This includes a child has to have privacy, with a lockable door and it's own bed. It involves being able to escape from parents and at best from siblings and also develop their own sexuality.
To not have this doesn't mean guaranteed issues, but it's more likely to develop such. Ask a child psychologist.
Edit2: I'll not comment to the guy below since I'd need to explain so many things, I'd spend an hour typing. Go and read something about child psychology and how children without their own room are forced to endure their narcissistic parents. Get back to the caves if you think a modern society should not provide at minimum a room to their kids. I didn't say siblings can't share theirs when young, but as they get older you definitely want to give them more space and that means their own room. I said "at best", as often families sadly don't have that option. I'll not let someone put things in my mouth, that I didn't say. But it's the second comment here, where people prefer creating a delusional goalpost than reading what I wrote. Pathetic.
Edit3: oh it's the same delusional person who also commented on my other comment. And twice used manipulative tricks to change the narrative. Guess I got to block that guy.
Lockable doors and beds didn't even exist for the vast majority of humanity's existence and still don't in many places. Beds aren't even popular sometimes today. Many Japanese children and their parents sleep on mats on the floor. They also may have interior walls, including the ones of their room, made of rice paper. Are all of those children mentally ill?
To suggest that lacking such things would cause mental illness would be to suggest that only a small segment of humanity has ever been not been mentally ill.
As far as escaping your parents or developing your sexuality, neither a lockable door nor a bed are necessary for those things. You may have to go outside your own home once in a while though.
would be to suggest that only a small segment of humanity has ever been not been mentally ill
Look I think the OP needs some perspective, but stepping back for a minute to look around at the world... are you sure that's an unreasonable suggestion?
Yes I do think that's an unreasonable suggestion considering the vast amount of time our species has been on this planet, we were small groups of hunter-gatherers and there's not, as far as I know, widespread mental illness amongst modern hunter-gatherers.
And those hunter gatherers often all live together as one single tribe. Not only do the children not have their own rooms, no one does. Let alone locks.
Homie, it was a joke about the state of the world. I recognise your username, we are often arguing the same points in threads so I think we agree on a lot. There's no need to come at me all serious, I was just trying to give you a wry smile.
Sorry, this other guy who doesn't understand the concept of mental illness got my goat.
I think a child has a better chance of turning out just fine with loving parents and sharing a room with bunk beds with their sibling than going to a foster family and split from their siblings, but at least they have their own room!
Not having your own room as a kid isn't abuse.
My brother in Christ, please, for your own sake, touch grass.
Hello, Cult of Ignorance.
Hello, Cult of Ignorance
“Your boos mean nothing, I’ve seen what makes you cheer.”
Someone has had a really sheltered existence.
Sad stuff. Another case of the perfect being the enemy of the good.
It's bloated, parent homes who meet basic requirements for a child have to get them back asap. There's no excuse for a system to be this slow.
That’s absolutely disgusting. The state should not kidnap children when their housing conditions cannot be met by a minimum wage.
As if taking the kids away from a stable, albeit less-than-ideal, home to send them to an even worse situation is the solution.
Sometimes the state can be way too bureaucratic and heartless.
https://nccpr.org/the-evidence-is-in-foster-care-vs-keeping-families-together-the-definitive-studies/
Foster Care is TERRIBLE for kids. Only the most severe cases of abuse and neglect should cause removal. In these cases adoption should be looked at because the instability of foster homes causes measurable damages
Apparently everybody before 1800 was a bad parent.
“You don’t have have air conditioning, it’s not safe for your kids to be here!” - someone in 1800 probably
Goodness, I wonder what's different about the climate since 1800...
Are you suggesting children in 2024 should not be allowed to be reunited with their parents unless those parents can afford air conditioning?
Ah yes, I forgot we still live in 1800s. Also people back then were not fine and had all sorts of mental issues. Taking the kids away is of course the wrong move, but often might be the only way so parents improve. But a child deserves it's own bed and room. Also get reunited with their parents asap once condition improved.
1800s? Siblings share rooms all the time today. Many, many, many children growing up right now in the United States are sharing a room with their sibling. I have no idea why you think this would be abnormal.
Moving the goal post. Siblings sharing is not the same as sharing the room with their parents and even the bed. Also 1800 said the guy before me, that's not my take. I also didn't say that siblings sharing a room is abnormal. You said that.
I'm pretty sure you are the one moving the goalposts here since this is about keeping parents from having access to their children because of issues like that, as the linked article discusses.
You are unable to read and your incompetence is rude too, because you only learned to twist words but not to understand. Why did they lose their kids to begin with, huh? Because of no own room. Also do you read what people commented, under which I replied to, which then changes the topic slightly? The discussion is in context and not what you think it is. People who are smart, are able to talk about multiple things in one thread. I also already said on multiple places, that they should've got back their kids asap. Your brain skipped that part at least twice.
Quote
She has trouble with providing space for her kids, so later them getting older, in their late teens, requiring more space, will once again cause issues. Pretty logical why they didn't give custody back to her, as she'd create another case in a few months/years. No that's not good for the kids.
Insulting me doesn't change the fact that you claimed that siblings sharing a room causes mental illness:
So sure, you said they should get their kids back, but at the same time claimed that more than one child to a room causes mental illness. So you're being pretty inconsistent unless you think parents should be allowed to make their children mentally ill.
Also, it's kind of weird that you're accusing me of being rude when you're the one doing the insulting...
In the room with their parents will likely cause issues, especially now with the growing control freek parents. And later when they are almost adults, sharing a room with siblings, might to a lesser content, cause issues. Brother and sister, will cause a lot of stress. But hey, some call that positive.
The biggest issue is sharing it with parents, because some still believe beating their kids is fine and if the kid can't even hide inside their room and lock the door, they are full out lost. I thankfully had a door to hide from my manic abusive mom. Fuck whoever says their own room isn't required. Also siblings can be bullies and abuser too, just saying.
Many, many cultures the world over involve parents and children sharing the same room. Are they all mentally ill?
And your argument that kids should have their own room because of abusive parents is an argument against abusive parents not in favor of every child having their own individual room. It also has nothing to do with not having that room causing mental illness unless you think indigenous people from Indonesia to Alaska are making all of their children mentally ill and always have.
If parents are abusing their kids, take the kids away from them. That is what causes mental illness.
They can also be very supportive and sheltering if their sibling is being abused by a parent and the siblings share a room. Or did you not consider that? Maybe it's not as cut-and-dried as you think and you're transferring your own, admittedly terrible, experiences on the world?
I had my own room when I grew up but I didn't have a lock on my door. I never felt I needed one and if I had one, I never would have locked it. My parents weren't abusive. If our circumstances went bad and I had to share a one-room apartment with them, they wouldn't have abused me then either. So why would I have needed a lock on my door?
My parents grew up in homes with 3 bedrooms and 5-6 kids. They made it work and it wasn’t considered a problem back then.
My mother and her family grew up in New York City apartments, which were usually one bedroom. She and her brother slept in the living room.
Bunk beds have existed for a long time, not that big a deal.
Nice and what about the kids that did develop issues because of that? Do you not count them because you personally were totally fine with it?
Edit: I'll take the downvotes, because you guys know nothing about mental illness, a healthy child life and psychology. This includes a child has to have privacy, with a lockable door and it's own bed. It involves being able to escape from parents and at best from siblings and also develop their own sexuality.
To not have this doesn't mean guaranteed issues, but it's more likely to develop such. Ask a child psychologist.
Edit2: I'll not comment to the guy below since I'd need to explain so many things, I'd spend an hour typing. Go and read something about child psychology and how children without their own room are forced to endure their narcissistic parents. Get back to the caves if you think a modern society should not provide at minimum a room to their kids. I didn't say siblings can't share theirs when young, but as they get older you definitely want to give them more space and that means their own room. I said "at best", as often families sadly don't have that option. I'll not let someone put things in my mouth, that I didn't say. But it's the second comment here, where people prefer creating a delusional goalpost than reading what I wrote. Pathetic.
Edit3: oh it's the same delusional person who also commented on my other comment. And twice used manipulative tricks to change the narrative. Guess I got to block that guy.
Lockable doors and beds didn't even exist for the vast majority of humanity's existence and still don't in many places. Beds aren't even popular sometimes today. Many Japanese children and their parents sleep on mats on the floor. They also may have interior walls, including the ones of their room, made of rice paper. Are all of those children mentally ill?
To suggest that lacking such things would cause mental illness would be to suggest that only a small segment of humanity has ever been not been mentally ill.
As far as escaping your parents or developing your sexuality, neither a lockable door nor a bed are necessary for those things. You may have to go outside your own home once in a while though.
Look I think the OP needs some perspective, but stepping back for a minute to look around at the world... are you sure that's an unreasonable suggestion?
Yes I do think that's an unreasonable suggestion considering the vast amount of time our species has been on this planet, we were small groups of hunter-gatherers and there's not, as far as I know, widespread mental illness amongst modern hunter-gatherers.
And those hunter gatherers often all live together as one single tribe. Not only do the children not have their own rooms, no one does. Let alone locks.
Homie, it was a joke about the state of the world. I recognise your username, we are often arguing the same points in threads so I think we agree on a lot. There's no need to come at me all serious, I was just trying to give you a wry smile.
Sorry, this other guy who doesn't understand the concept of mental illness got my goat.
I think a child has a better chance of turning out just fine with loving parents and sharing a room with bunk beds with their sibling than going to a foster family and split from their siblings, but at least they have their own room!
Not having your own room as a kid isn't abuse.
My brother in Christ, please, for your own sake, touch grass.
Hello, Cult of Ignorance.
“Your boos mean nothing, I’ve seen what makes you cheer.”
Someone has had a really sheltered existence.
Sad stuff. Another case of the perfect being the enemy of the good.
It's bloated, parent homes who meet basic requirements for a child have to get them back asap. There's no excuse for a system to be this slow.
That's a big problem in the foster system too.