Fact: becoming a programmer significantly increases your risk of being blinded and eaten by a Dilophosaurus

ZeroCool@slrpnk.net to Programmer Humor@programming.dev – 682 points –
21

“I am totally unappreciated in my time. You can run this whole park from this room with minimal staff for up to three days. You think that kind of automation is easy? Or cheap? You know anybody who can network eight connection machines and debug 2 million lines of code for what I bid for this job? Because if he can I’d like to see him try.”

Plausibility Level: 5/10 Gibsons. Classic overweight, underappreciated IT guy…who runs and is secretly stealing from an island full of deadly reanimated dinosaurs.

https://sdtimes.com/coders/how-realistic-are-these-21-coders-from-movies-and-tv-shows/

Linux is a slippery slope to Dilophosaurs consumption. Fun fact: the slippery slope has a cameo in the movie!

Excuse me, but clearly it's UNIX that leads to Dilophosaur consumption. We know this.

This is aunix system I know this

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He must've learnt C. Now if only he'd learnt Rust, he would've been safe and had a blazingly fast🚀 escape

And being eaten by a motherfucking velociraptor in a mfin electric substation, coders are weak to dino sadly.

It's true. The odds increase several times.

Its illegal to reboot a server without first saying quietly "Hold on to your butts!"

Look, just because you know how to code doesn't mean you have to steal dinosaur DNA for the CIA. That part is totally optional.

You could choose to instead hack an oil company to implant a worm that siphons off all the extra money rounded off by bank transactions and disguise it with a virus that makes oil tankers capsize.

Increases your risk of becoming a fat arse too