Sausage Rules

Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to 196@lemmy.blahaj.zone – 410 points –
23

The fuck even went wrong with them?! This has to be intentional. Meat doesn’t stretch when it gets cooked

Speak for yourself 😏

You’re right, I guess I can only say that when I put my penis in the oven at 350 for 20 min, it doesn’t grow. In fact, it gets smaller and very red and tender

They were squeezed out

I thought so as well. Maybe the other side of the protruding sausages were progressively squeezed out by the dough starting from the tip, and it's probably due to the proximity to other rolls in the back, or maybe the center of the oven was much hotter and ended up cooking (and growing) the dough unevenly. That explains why the tip of the sausages looks popped.

Stop setting unrealistic expectations for sausage rolls! These are also beautiful, and their feelings are valid! Not all sausage rolls are taut and perky and you should acknowledge that!

/s obviously, but this is the interwebs

I'd assume the logical way to eat that is with your hand. I feel like your choices are to manhandle the dangler and eat the bread first, or, you can hold it by the bread and fight the wiggler into your mouth. Both feel equally silly, but I'm down.

Kane Lynch's character in Role Models would have a field day with these