Zuckerberg/Musk Cage Match Incoming?

prlang@beehaw.org to Technology@beehaw.org – 55 points –
Mark Zuckerberg is ready to fight Elon Musk in a cage match
theverge.com

My moneys on Zuck

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My money would also be on Zuck, he is in great shape and also does judo competitions.

Elon is pale and round, he sleeps at the office and is a workaholic.

I think Zuck does BJJ, not judo. Which would be even better for the cage fight.

Also, having hydraulic joints and titanium frame helps to absorb any damage Musk could inflict.

Not even fair. The Zuck is a robot he doesn't even feel any pain.

The society of spectacle in all its absurd glory. Sigh

Isn’t it depressing? This is literally where humanity has come to? Two billionaire tech-bros acting like spoiled children and we, the plebs, cheering like we did for the kings who sent us to slaughter so they could satisfy their ambitions of empire in medieval times.

Their interests are not aligned with ours.

I hope they take eachother out.

But all in all, the lizzuck is the most likely to win given his MMA background.

I feel weird supporting Zuck, but the thought of someone knocking that shit-eating grin off Elon’s face…

Seriously, this is the first time I’ve been on his side I think ever….I don’t like it, but I stand by it.

Yes, it's impressive that he's made evil overlord Zuckerberg seem like the people's champion.

I'm a long-time proponent of the participants of such matches being handed a single brick before they go into whatever closed room or arena has been agreed upon. Also leave a third brick in the middle of the area. It creates a certain degree of strategy. It also livens up the "just hugging" part of the fight that many UFC or boxing matches kinda devolve into.

Do you throw the brick? Use it to block a thrown brick? Use it add a blunt weapon? Plus you need to get that third brick, but doing so exposes you to getting hit with a brick as you bend down to get it. There's so many choices it's like rock, paper, scissors except it's just brick, brick, brick.

I'd pay to watch that.

Gotta be Thunderdome rules though.

Edit, on a second though, I wouldn't bother even then. Who cares about these a-holes.

Well, if both of them suffer that would be a win in my book.

That also depends on who the final boss is.

"Congratulations (insert name of winner), now it's time to face off against..."

dramatic reveal

We could always just throw the cage into the water off the coast of nova scotia, i hear it's a hot destination for billionaires this time of year.

I’ll read the result on here afterwards and laugh if anyone has some serious injuries but otherwise won’t give them the attention they crave.

If 2 CEOs want to fight each other, I'll give them all the attention they want for that.

2 more...

Good luck to both of them. May it end up in a tie. If you know what I mean.

We slightly modified the rules of thunderdome. Fewer people leave in this version.

I'm sorry for the level of discourse I'm about to engage in, but Zuckerberg knows Jiujitsu, I think if Musk had any actual training in any skillful way of fighting we would've seen it - the dude probably knows Zuckerberg knows jiujitsu, maybe he was just hoping that he would ignore the challenge? lmao

[Musk] has talked about being in “real hard-core street fights"

dude's gonna break his back if he doesnt back out last minute

Musk has his hair implants and synthol muscles.
But Zuck has the dead eyes and robotic mercilessness of a terminator. And he's been MMA training for years.

Much as I hate Zuck this will serve to humiliate Musk no matter if he commits or backs down. And I'm all about that.

I really enjoy that you apologized before engaging with knowledge on the subject. I agree on all fronts, including the vague sense of shame.

Much prefer a cage match between Musk and one of the many Twitter employees he stiffed. I am sure there would be no shortage of Twitter volunteers.

Better yet, lock Musk in a room with all the employees he fired for no good reason.

They've made a Trump-Biden AI debate, what are you creatives waiting to make a Musk-Zuck Mortal Kombat stream?

Perfect opportunity for MTV to bring back Celebrity Deathmatch.

Can we just put them both in a cage, lose the key, and move on as a species?

This has Celebrity Death Match vibes...

As if these two needed their egos stroked even more. I'll never understand why billionaires need so much attention, and why on earth we give it to them.

It's one of the few things you can't buy outright. And I don't believe you can amass and keep a billion dollars without having some kind of fundamental need that can't be filled, and once they realize that the money isn't doing it, they go for whatever else they can.

wait like, not as a metaphor but an actual cage match? Why-- actually nah, i'm all for it, sure. I'll be rooting for cage to win.

I hate them both, but I hope Zucc beats the shit out of Musk. Assuming Musk doesn't just back out like a coward, anyway

Oh shit! Celebrity Deathmatch is finally getting a new season!?

This is a good start. Let's have a mandatory tournament for all billionaires. They could have the option of not participating for...let's say 5 billion, which would be distributed to various charities (otherwise poor Buffett would probably die in the ring). Anyone that loses a match has to pay some taxes.