I can't be convinced otherwise

The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.worldmod to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world – 479 points –
39

When I was a kid my parents took me to a pool where the bottom was a huge mosaic of a killer whale. Fuck no. I think that pool gave birth to my hate of water.

What the actual heck, I have the exact same childhood NOPE memory of a pool with an orca mosaic. You're the first one to validate that, none of my family remembers! I think I might have almost drowned in there too.

The shark looks like it needs it's snoot booped :3

I mean I can’t prove that there ISN’T a shark just out of my sight at all times.

I haven't set foot in a public pool since I learned that chlorine doesn't have a smell, and that public pool "chlorine" smell is actually chloramines - made from the chlorine in the pool reacting with ammonia in urine.

Avoiding the shark is just an added bonus

Who told you chlorine doesn't smell? I hit my pool with a few gallons every few weeks and it definitely smells strongly.

😂 I love all the lore around pool pee. Which one of your buddies told you this? This is right up there with the don't pee in this pool - there is a chemical tracer that will turn it pink myth.

Get out there and sniff some chlorine brother! It indeed has a smell! With or without the pee.

if you sniff a jug of chlorine, sure you'll smell it but diluted in a pool to 3-5ppm you shouldn't be able to smell it unless it's reacting with contaminants, not necessarily urine, but not not necessarily urine. If it has a strong odor from far away either the pool has way more than say 10 ppm chlorine or is reacting with stuff or both. The good news is the chlorine is doing its job and you're probably fine. probably.

This is not at all a reliable indicator of pool urine content. Do public pools contain urine? Yep. Does a smellier pool mean more urine? Nope.

Thanks for reiterating what I said I guess...

Blåhaj only attacks transphobes, so it shouldn't be a problem

This phantasmal creature can be slain just like the rest.

Get into a well spaced octagon with some VERY trustworthy individuals. If everyone turns their back at the same time at equal distance, the sharks will amalgamate at the center. They will all split apart when they try to eat you, killing the creature(s) once and for all.

This is the only way and DO NOT TRY WITH OTHER SHAPES DO NOT ADD DIMENSIONS TO THE RITUAL

no glass or greased watermelons in the water

Couldn't be any public pool I've gone to

... Greased watermelons? Do I want to know?

You never played greased watermelon as a kid in the public pool? You grease up a water Melon and throw it in the water and all the kids go crazy trying to grab it but it just keeps slipping away. Some of my fondest childhood moments were spent playing greased watermelon

I tried, but they wouldn't let us into the nice pool, despite how hot a day it was, because they thought we were trash. We tried to make our own pool from an abandoned one, but instead we got trapped inside it

I'm always more worried there is a frothy floating child turd right behind me. Maybe my imagination is crippled.

frothy floating child turd

what a colorful way to describe a child, they sure don't understand personal space though.

I had nightmares like this, unable to get out of the water with the shark around the corner

I had the same thing as a kid but with a jellyfish instead of shark

Me too. The thought of a shark never really crossed my mind, ever. But the jellyfish absolutely did.

Sometimes, it still does.