What are some of the best decisions of your life?

erik111189@lemmy.world to Ask Lemmy@lemmy.world – 119 points –

I'm talking about life decisions that worked out perfectly and left you with no regrets. Here are mine:

  1. Quitting Facebook - I quit using facebook about 2 years ago. It's a toxic platform that destroys your privacy, worsens your mental health, and endangers democracies. Much happier since I quit, and no regrets at all. Talking to friends and family face to face or through text is way better.

  2. Quitting my old toxic, stressful job - I quit working at a top 500 software firm a while back and have been much happier ever since. There was little to no work/life balance, co-workers were extremely antagonistic, the work was amazingly both boring and stressful, and management didn't care about anything. Quit for another job that paid around the same with a much better culture. No regrets.

  3. Reading books - Books have completely re-shaped my world view, and I would be much worse off without them. Here is my list:

    • "The Better Angels of Our Nature," "Enlightenment Now," and "Factfulness" by Steven Pinker (first two) and Hans Rosling (last). The world is improving overall, not getting worse like the media makes it seem. Reading the facts convinced me it is logical to be an optimist.

    • "Ultralearning" by Scott Young and "A Mind for Numbers" by Barbara Oakley. Two books that teach the science of efficient learning. These books helped me understand the best strategies for long-term knowledge retention. Every public school in the world should be teaching the concepts in these books.

    • "The Bogleheads' Guide to Investing," "The Millionaire Next Door," and "Your Money or your Life," by Taylor Larimor, Cotter Smithand, and Vicki Robin (in that order). As well as various FIRE blogs. These books helped me learn the basics of personal finance, investing, and early retirement. Previously I thought that working until you die was an unavoidable fact of life. Reading about FIRE and smart money management made me question that assumption, and freed me from the shackles of corporate nonsense.

I'm interested in hearing what other people have to say. Give me what you've got.

55

Quitting Alcohol / Smoking. Not only for my long term health but for my wallet.

I used to have ~8 beers daily. Felt terrible majority of the time. Now I workout 4 days a week and only drink 2 beers every Friday. It's great.

Wish I had your self control! I do miss having a beer or two socially.

Getting in shape and having a regular exercise routine, for sure. All of the side effects from that are incredible... Stamina, confidence, clearer thinking. So great.

Stopping smoking and going vegan. Also taking care of myself in any way, be it fitness or finances.

I started a morning journaling habit and committed to doing it for two weeks - about five years ago.

Most mornings I just jot down 3 quick random things I am thankful for.

Now when I look back over those journals I see evidence of big decisions they helped me make, new habits, all kinds of other ways it's affected me for the better.

I've also built up a nice little stock of letters to my kids this way, for them to enjoy after I'm gone.

My morning journalling is also five years old this year. My only regret is that I wish I'd done it sooner. Going back and reading what you did last year or the year before, can really show how much you've grown or what still needs improving.

Creating a budget. I’m naturally frugal so I did okay without a budget. Stayed out of debt, saved for retirement, etc. Making a budget took it up to completely new level. It added clarity into all of my personal finances. I plan and save more. I know exactly when to expect upcoming expenses and have emergency funds earmarked for unexpected. I have a much better understanding of how much I can contribute towards retirement while keeping a sufficient cash flow for my budget. A budget made everything more clear and reduced stress

Yeah. I did well before I kept a budget, but I could not have afforded my pandemic home arcade project without my budget spreadsheet.

I just read a little bit my best decisions are getting married and having my kids

Not for everyone, and it’s not ALL upside but having a kid. It is so much fucking fun, and it inspires me to be my best self at the same time.

Moving closer to family has been really nice

We're considering moving to Europe soon for a job opportunity, but moving away from family is the major downside.

Best of luck, Europe is worth it. Maybe you can go for a couple of years and hopefully fam can visit a bunch.

Unmarried and childless.

I get to enjoy all of my money AND time. Glorious.

Indulging my bdsm fetishes with consenting and enthusiastic participants:)

Changing career paths in my 30s (less stress, more money), getting a divorce (not staying in an unhealthy relationship), having kids (gives me a lot of purpose), paying down my mortgage (financial freedom)

Both of my kids. Most stressful job you could image - but the „payout“ is worth every bit of it. Every fuckin day

Quitting college and trying to make my hobby of computers my living in the late 1980s. I rode the technology wave to my current job as an IT manager.

getting into D&D because it helped me gain some very good friends

  • Keeping my reading habit throughout the past decade.
  • Choosing the "wise" path of Computer Science instead of Physics as my degree: I absolutely love math and physics but sadly in my country research and teaching are poorly financed and paid. I don't love CS but I enjoy it enough and also the pay is very good even for a fresh graduate.
  • Learning about finances and investing. I don't expect to FIRE but at least I think I'm on the good path

Stopping drinking alcohol, and getting in a regular exercise routine. I was never a huge drinker nor was I really overweight, but both changes made a massive difference.

Getting out of the US Army.

Not having any kids, and getting dogs instead.

Getting a bidet.

Balance-transfering my way out of credit card debt.

We went out on a limb and just closed down our business and moved to a new city. Since we got there, it's like I've had a horseshoe up my rear end.

Joining the military. It was not for me, but it gave me a career path and got me out of the house at 18.

Quitting drinking.

Not having kids.

What are some of the things you got out of those investment/finance books? I'm curious as to whether they would be helpful for me.

I always thought those books were the basic stuff you would already know.

Thanks!

Not OP, but I'm a big fan of the Boglehead's Guide.

John Bogle was the founder of Vanguard and was one of the key figures in promoting index funds and low cost investing. This book covers his investing philosophy in an easy to understand manner.

To tl;dr the book, buy 1 total market , 1 total bond, and 1 total international index fund. That gets you a weighted piece of everything. There is no picking winners, you are picking EVERYTHING.

This will give you an AVERAGE return every year with no need for you to do any trading. Why do you want average instead of the best? Because no one can predict what will be best, but 75% of all funds perform LESS THAN AVERAGE.

It greatly simplifies investing with results you can verify yourself, and it takes almost so the stress out of investing so you actually do it and stick with it, and the quantity of time your money spends invested without touching it is what gets you the positive return on investment.

The book is about 300 pages, so this is obviously simplified. If you'd like a longer but still quick explanation check out the Bogleheads forum wiki.

Thank you for the book recommendations. I'll have to check those out.

Uni, having kids, my last car, and hopefully buying a house (the latter remains to be seen but I’m optimistic).

Not having kids, ending a toxic relationship, changing career path (programming) , exercising min 4 days/week.

No particular order: Losing weight, learning guitar and 3D modeling and having a kid.

Getting fit(ter), quitting smoking (12 years now), budgeting, doing things for me

Moving to a city that doesn't force you to own a car, learning Chinese, and quitting drinking

Reading books, quitting alcohol and stop being sedentary.