fuck the tests

Andromxda πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡¦πŸ‡΅πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡ΉπŸ‡Ό@lemmy.dbzer0.com to Programmer Humor@programming.dev – 807 points –
42

Run it in your head, find the edge cases yourself, fix the bug... weakling.

Or do what I do in real life which is patch in new bugs and even a security flaw or two.

the energy of a chaotic neutral?
"maybe it'll work, maybe it won't, but it'll be FUN"

or chaotic evil?
"naw. fuck y'all's weekend.

Merging failing tests so everybody else has failing tests and wastes time figuring out why.

Nothing neutral here

Tests are just booby traps for the other engineers so they don't break your code by mistake.

Its funny cause its true. I often design tests to be "if a case/enum value is added this test will explode and tell them to add code here"

Real programmers test in production.

You mean like this?

You mean like this?

Or like this?

What does that mean, 'To play us out'?

Fuck yeah

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While I know that these days, bugs in code can cause real-world harm (personal info leaks, superannuation records lost, lol google), I find it humorous to think of the equivalent, even worse outcomes in my discipline (chemical/process engineering).

"Didn't do any checks, fuck it, I know this calculation is fire πŸ”₯"

Later: πŸ”₯πŸ”₯πŸ’₯

It’s more: I have routed a few pipes in our test system and it’s now spitting out water known to be contaminated but now should have some extra sprinkles in so it’s fine.

What I’m saying is it’s even worse than didn’t do any checks. It’s willfully ignoring existing checks intentionally.

Oh I trust my code, but I don't trust my coworkers not to break something on the very next commit.

I get a small amount of joy from clicking the "request changes" button and blocking some doofus from merging lazy untested code.

I love going into a PR with 3 approvals already and shitting all over it

I physically reacted to this post with a combination of disgust, anger, and fear. Do tests. All of the tests. Randomize the order in which your tests run. Cover all branches.

Tests? Pfffft. I am the test.

And while I'm here: https://blog.jim-nielsen.com/2024/sanding-ui/

It baffles me when people use flex layout when it's clearly visually a grid layout. Nothing here is flexing with varying element sizes and auto-fill-wrap-break of items.

A colleague of mine prefers flex too. But to me, grid is so much more intuitive and simple.

https://css-tricks.com/quick-whats-the-difference-between-flexbox-and-grid/

Tbh I'm not a web person (more of a backend person) and don't know the recommended practices. display: grid; is a good friend of mine xD

I think using display: grid; as your default is the better default, so you're all set. :)

Why do you need either? Just throw the both in the html

People can pull from my cold, dead hands.

(though I'm usually only using it to display some status just for me and not for external consumption; the UI side can have a JSON if it ever comes to that).

I used to be a full-stack dev, but I've been pure backend for so long now, everything I knew is outdated or deprecated.<table></table>

everything I knew is outdated or deprecated

Given the way the frontend world seems to work, this means you’ve been backend-only for at least a week lol

Weak code lacks tests

Alt: if strength relies on unity I need to switch to game dev

You can't trust others to not break your wonderful code. Write tests for the regression.