[Answered] Do "chest pillows" hurt for women to do?

Disc@lemmy.world to No Stupid Questions@lemmy.world – 77 points –

I see fan-art or scenes of a woman using her chest as basically a pillow for someone. It's cute and all, but I can't help think if that hurts for the woman, especially if her breasts are large?

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You really want the ribs to do most of the supporting of your head.

If she just flopped it on the table and you set your head on it, it would definitely not be comfortable for her.

The mental image of that really got me thanks.

The thunk and all the silverware and glasses rattling lol

The thunk on the table. The screech of shattering wood as the table legs splinter. The chiming-scream of windows blowing out

you rag-dolling through the air on the Shockwave and faintly, through the ringing of busted ear drums can be heard the refrain "everybody needs a bosom for a pillow... everybody needs a bosom..."

Mom and Dad staring incredulously as family dinner takes a very unexpected turn.

I need a photo of what you mean. Someone snuggling into your chest wouldn't hurt, but as Rhynoplaz says, if you plopped on a table then any weight on it would really hurt.

I rushed to Pinterest and I think this is a good example, which I think falls into your first example?

Oh yeah, that wouldn't hurt at all

Can confirm, that doesn't hurt. If anything I'd be more concerned about the weight on the abdomen and ribcage, if he falls asleep for example that dead weight is more likely to become a nuisance for breathing. But not for the breasts

There is a great deal of variety to breast sensitivity from one person to another. The same act might be pleasant, neutral or painful depending on the person. Even then, there are good and bad kinds of pain.

Also I’d imagine it varies day to day.

I’m a man but I have some days I can’t even pick up a glass of water without sharp pain everywhere I’m making contact. Other days my flesh is way less sensitive.

Odd phrasing, it isn't being a man that gives that sensation experience, it's some undisclosed condition. Whatever it is sounds very challenging.

Some of us even have difference in sensitivity from one side to the other.

It’s really more supporting your head on their ribs between their breasts.

Girls never understand how calming and relaxing that is for some reason.

Might be better to say mine didn’t.

A high physical affection person with a low one makes for an awkward and anxious relationship.

If you've never read up on "attachment styles," I found that concept to be extremely helpful. There's a book called Attached: The New Science of Adult Dating that I found great, despite feeling a bit silly over the title.

It seems like they're alluding to "love languages", but I believe attachment styles are something else

It's similar, but not quite the same. For example, an avoidant attachment style will tend to avoid getting close, an anxious attachment style will fear being abandoned. Put them together and you get a constant cycle of the anxious person drawing close to the avoidant person. The avoidant person pulls away. The anxious person eventually gets wounded. Now the avoidant person turns on the love mode to draw them back in. Rinse and repeat. It's awful.

That's a simplified version. But that's the basic gist. It's how you operate in relationships from a fundamental level, more than what makes you feel loved.

Cradling someone's head is fine, even comfortable.

I find it uncomfortable to lay on my stomach though. That pressure feels different

When they were growing in it would have. Even laying down felt like getting knives in the nipples. It's fine for me now, though.

Usually that doesn’t hurt, but that doesn’t mean that it never hurts. Really it depends on how sensitive they are, or if there are underlying issues (like cysts deep inside the tissue, maybe) that would make pressure on them very uncomfortable, or downright painful.

I think my xes appreciate not using them as a pillow... though they might not appreciate other things.