Masturbation abstinence is popular online. Doctors and therapists are worried

TokenBoomer@lemmy.world to News@lemmy.world – 73 points –
npr.org

NPR.org

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That's the most beta thing you can do.

I've never heard anybody I would consider "manly" identify behaviors as "beta" or "alpha". Only a bunch of scared little boys who are still overly obsessed with their penises.

I don't even understand why people care about what is or is not "manly." I have a penis and it functions. I'm not sure what else is necessary.

I think this line hints at it the underlying motivation.

A national poll conducted in late 2022 found that 4 out of 10 Americans believe society has become too "soft and feminine."

Basic mysogyny to have a negative and / or "less than" mentality around women. I think a lot of males don't consciously realize how much they marginalize and dehumanize women but are desperate to avoid being treated or thought of in the same manner. But that's just an opinion based on zero research on the topic.

Maybe that's why it doesn't make sense to me. There has never been anything in my experience that has made me think of women as lesser than men.

I mean I realize misogyny exists, it just is something I have difficulty understanding.

If you have difficulty understanding it, try to find any piece of media in a regular person's day that shows hairy women acting like neanderthals.

The idealization of the female body beyond the standard of reality is a form of misogyny. It says "you're not womanly enough".

The same can be said about the male body and misandry, but that bit isn't as visibly prevalent because sex sells and the ideal woman is imagined for sex.

You're talking about identifying if and he's taking about understanding it. Most of us can support misogyny all over the place, but if men and women are fully equals in your mind it just seems weird.

Identifying something is the first step in getting to know it. I helped identify, the rest is up to each person to decide.

The weirdness lies in the differences, such as the ability to bear children, which is pretty much not equal. Breasts can be equalized and so can the inward/outward genitals, size vs agility/dexterity, direction of thought... Yeah, I'm not seeing other unequal differences right now other than the baby thing.

I understand it in an abstract way, it's just hard for me to wrap my mind around more concretely because it's just not a mode of thinking I can put myself in.

That's fine. People usually don't. To recognize something in some way requires knowledge or experience. And we can neither know everything nor experience it.

Maybe they should, Data.

Maybe if we felt any loss as keenly as we felt the death of one close to us, human history would be a lot less bloody.

I think your answer also explains why they're so angry about white people no longer being the majority. They're scared they'll be treated how they've been treating everyone else.

Being obsessed with othersโ€™ sexuality is honestly the most beta male thing possible

Do you want Hannibal Lecters? Because that's how you get Hannibal Lecters!

Not masturbating leads to eating faces? Now I'm really glad I jerk off.

Glad I'm a tough woman who has no need to prove my femininity by denying myself the pleasure of masturbation.

Maybe this is why us women live longer than men do. Lol

One of my best friends started doing this. It was around that time he started to become a little narcissistic.

"That's the most beta thing you can do. That's the weakest thing any man can do," he says.

I'm cool with that.

Controlling masterbation with shame and guilt fucks you up, there.s a reason religions and authoritarian leaders love to do it (and this is literally an example of that happening)

Thatโ€™s why I just whack it at least 10 times a day every day. My doctor is worried about other things though, like telling him how often I jerk it.

๐Ÿ˜‚ dudeeeee Give your mangalho some rest please

This scammers emails me about once a every three months demanding bitcoins or he will publish a video he claims he took of me as well as my porn viewing habits. It isn't the laughable attempt at blackmail that bothers me so much as it is the last two paragraphs where he tells me how God wants me to No-Fap and how glorious it is to no longer do it. I can hate a scammer but I feel bad hating someone clearly mentally touched.

You should tell him thatโ€™s your kink and see how they respond.

And post the response here. :)

I'm always up for a good scammer beatdown.

My doctor doesn't need to worry about me.

Or me. Tell him I jack off every day. It's very important to my life to be able to do so.

Aight real talk if you want to have real pleasure stop masturbating and start fucking yourself. Get a good couple dildos (make sure they're platinum cure or medical grade or otherwise body safe, it's perfectly legal to sell you dildos that will give you ass cancer), get some good (read: not glycerin based) water based lube, figure out what positions you like, and go to town on yourself 3 or 4 days a week. The longer you go without cumming, the more desperately horny you get, the better it will be. Don't stress the not cumming part too much, but it does make it better. If you're looking for recommendations, the dual density neo elite dildos are a good place to start. xLube or kLube is what I use for lube, and I also can't recoomend a big, squishy plug, like a square peg egg plug or topped toys gape keeper enough. Don't stop pleasuring yourself, do it better =D

Why use stick if good old hand do the trick?

I mean, yeah fingering your ass is good too but your wrist will get tired fast

Jokes aside, stimulating your prostate like that feels really really good. You don't have to be gay to enjoy it, just comfortable enough with who you are to not mind putting something phallic up your ass. Personally, I used to jack off a ton (and still do quite a bit) but masturbation for me isn't really satisfying, it's a quick small hit of the good brain chemicals to help offset the adhd and depression. Fucking myself is a whole nother world and I didn't know I could feel that good tbh. I consider myself bi but am generally a lot more attracted to femininity than masculinity. Honestly took me quite a while to get comfortable with giving it a try but I'm so fucking glad I did. So, I'm recommending it and maybe someone reading this will discover they love it as much as I do.

Probably not, looking at the vote ratio but hey, worth talking about

Some folks are realizing they are fully addicted to a shitty lifestyle.

Caffeine all day, weed all evening, alcohol regularly, porn daily(or throughout every day). All instant gratification. All the time. No discipline, no exercise, no patience.

This nofap stuff is a fucked up off shoot of some folks realizing they aren't living right. They then latch onto this particular thing, and take it way too far.

I'm sorry, wtf is with that link? 2026/01/01? Links use ISO format so that's January 1st, 2026.

i'm guessing NPR got hacked or something?

Edit: Here's a link from something on their front page today:

https://www.npr.org/2024/02/04/1227928003/rising-car-thefts-st-paul-minnesota-fallen-hyundai-kia

Today's date, February 4th, 2024.

Something is wrong here.

Edit 2: couldn't find anything weird beyond that, guess it was a glitch like someone said.

The date on the actual article is correct. And modifying the URL to use the right date just redirects to the same URL. It's probably just a minor system glitch, not hacking.

Still suspicious, but so far everything seems good, beyond the link cant find anything else out of the ordinary.

You're likely right im guessing, though i'll still stay cautious of links.

The article says February 3, 2024. I don't think it matters what the URL says.

Maybe because the date in the url is linked to how long the url will remain active, as it's also a podcast.