Seedless Catholics Against Watermelons?

Sjmarf@sh.itjust.works to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world – 874 points –
57

Every seed is sacred

Every seed is great

If a seed is wasted

God gets quite irate!

soo... cum in seedless watermelons?

Yes. American Pie - Summer Edition. Just as warm, but a little bit wetter.

What's wrong with seedless watermelons? Are GMOs forbidden by Christian law?

probably same reason why some are anti birth control. kinda playing against gods role by manipulating the natural result.

Should someone tell them why watermelons are so big and delicious in the first place?

Because god put them there as a tasty treat for his most faithful hippopotamuses :)

They need to learn about bananas.

Also like, 100% of all agriculture and livestock. Fuck. Look at what we did to wolves. If god didn't want us to fuck around with genetics they wouldn't have made them malleable.

Obviously agriculture is a lie. Cows and sheep and donkeys and chickens and dogs always existed exactly as they do now since that's how God made them and they never changed.

Or something.

Well, the universe was create 6000 years ago so obviously domesticated animals have always been as they are. /s

You know the saying, "it didn't happen if it isn't in writing"?

That must apply to all of prehistory then, right?

Funny thing is they aren't even GMOs, they're hybrids between tetraploid and diploid watermelon cultivars. You could do it yourself in your backyard if you can find tetraploid seed for sale, or make it yourself with colchicine

Are GMOs forbidden by Christian law?

No, AFAIK they aren't

I think it's just a joke and not a real movement or something

I dunno, while I support everyone's right to their own beliefs, some of their past actions and even current doctrine do not sit well with me.

The Catholics aren't much better.

Exactly. How long will watermelons keep silent about the genocide?

The genoseed hasn't been talked about enough.

Tensions between the watermelons and the cavaillons have always been high, but now we're just at a pitting point.

All the more suspicious that watermelons don't talk about it

I too will be joining the seedless watermelons against Catholics.

Who do they think they are?

To be fair seedless watermelons suck

Now why seedless watermelons suck is an interesting story.

The first intentional creation of a seedless watermelon was done in 1939 in Japan. University breeding programs in the southern U.S. after WWII began using the technology to create the first hybrids. In the early '50's and '60's multiple tetraploids were created by the university programs and released to private companies to produce seed with.

These tetraploid lines were "greys". "Greys" were selected to have a thick hard rind for long distance shipping. They were barely red on the inside and tasted slightly bitter. They all sucked for flavor.

A seedless watermelon hybrid is made by crossing a tetraploid female by a diploid male. The resulting hybrid (triploid) has 3 copies of every chromosome and is sterile.

Fertile stable tetraploids take a long time to create - around 15 generations of you are lucky. Seedless watermelons also took a long time to gain popularity in the market. So nobody put significant money or time into creating more tetraploid inbreds for over 40 years.

From the 1980's when seedless watermelons were introduced until around 2010, everyone used those shitty old tetraploids as 2/3rds of the hybrid. Since 2010 companies have created new tetraploid to use, but a significant portion still use 70 year old shitty ones.

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Is it bad that I scrolled to make sure it wasn't a shittymorph before I decided to read the rest?

That's extremely interesting, thank you for sharing it!

Also a bit of trivia I had to double check.

The seedless watermelon against Catholics image.

The original picture is one I took.

I didn't even know seedless watermelons were a thing, so it saddens me to discover that they are, and that they're bad, since the main reason I don't like watermelons is having to deal with the seeds.

They are not all bad. In the early 2000's a breeder created a logistical method create tetraploids in 6 years (5 generations every 2 years). He used 3 countries to do it in if I recall correctly.

He integrated some of the small seeded deep red fleshed Chinese germplasm combined with the old flavorful allsweet types to make dramatically improved tetraploids.

Other companies have followed suit and the average quality of the fruit has improved. Some of the newer ones have really excellent flavor.

They do. I had this conversation the other day, and it led to Bill Gates trying to to basically monopolize farming. It was right before a five-hour meeting and so I forgot to research it at all after, but you have just reminded me.

Back on topic though, I can't find seedless watermelons anywhere. I live in Jersey (New), and my local supermarket is and has been seedless for at least a decade. I can't recall the last time I enjoyed watermelon with a seed. My presumption was that they're stopping us from growing them at home. I'm sure it's much more (or less) nuanced than that. I'm an idiot.

Watermelons are not true to seed- a watermelon grown from a collected seed will not necessarily resemble it's parent. But surprise melons are fun! Usually not as sweet as those with carefully controlled genetics though.

It's all about profits. Seedless watermelons usually sell better with American consumers.

In order to produce fruit on triploid watermelons there has to be regular seeded (diploid) varieties in the field. Traditionally they would use a large oblong traditional seeded (allsweet types). Mainly because there was a market for them and they looked different than the seedless varieties.

The growers had to dedicate 1/5th of their acres to growing a seeded melons which they could sell at 50% or less than seedless varieties.

That's when seed companies introduced dedicated pollinators (non-harvested). These untilized several different dwarf genes and could be interplanted with seedless varities with no loss of space.

With the exception of the big party markets like the 4th of July, most fields utilize the dedicated pollinators in the U.S. now. For production in Latin America, they export the seedless ones to the U.S. and sell the seeded ones l ones domestically.

Bottom line, today you only occasionally seeded watermelons in grocery stores in the U.S. and Canada.

That's a thorough explanation, very much appreciated. I'd like to do more than just say thanks but I have nothing to add to the conversation.

Nah, they don't really care about gardeners. They need farmers to buy new seeds every year.

If God doesn't want us fucking with their creations, they're more than welcome to hold a press conference.

Until then, I'll keep assuming they're emotionally crippled howard Hughes style in the Heaven Penthouse drinking their own divine urine and shouting random conspiracies about which Angel is gonna pull a Lucifer next.

"If that is okay, please give me absolutely no sign."

...

"Thy will be done."

I'm pretty sure there aren't any eunuchs around anymore. Otherwise there would still be castrati.

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