So... I'm being judge because the instance I choose?

I have never once looked at a user's instance.

There probably are some people who do, just like how there are people who will judge you based on what brand of pants you wear, but most people are just glad that you're wearing pants.

If you're on lemmygrad or hexbear I will immediately dismiss pretty much anything you say and assume you aren't worth interacting with. Otherwise I don't put a lot of stock into what instance a user belongs to. Sometimes your instance can indicate that you have certain interests (technology based instances, startrek.website) or how you identify (blahaj.zone, pawb.social, etc).

I have a lot of issues with the admins of lemmy.ml, but I don't think the users are inherently problematic. The server itself is advertised as being for privacy and FOSS enthusiasts, so I think a lot of people join without realizing the admins enforce their explicitly communist viewpoints that sometimes border on being pretty tanky.

Yep. If I see someone from hexbear, anything they're saying I immediately ignore. Lemmy.ml is full of assholes, but they don't advertise it that way so a lot of decent people are on there too. You can't really judge an individual just because they're on lemmy.ml imo.

People, myself included, aren't fond of lemmy.ml because it pretends to be a privacy-centric instance but it's actually run by people who defend any and every criticism of Russia and China under the guise of critiquing capitalism.

They commonly say that any bad news about China or Russia is western propaganda while everything from their state-run "news" platforms is gospel.

They're unable to say that two things are true at once, like capitalism is a pure shit system AND China and Russia are fucked for a million reasons specific to them.

People get banned from their server for saying that China is anything but a utopian dream.

And then, yes, people unfairly assume that you must be cool with all that because you're using their instance. If you're not married to the idea of staying there, I'd suggest deleting your account and using a different instance.

I don't judge users for their instance. I'll judge mods and admins for what they promote and allow, but not users. Unless they're tankies from lemmygrad.

The only instance that I'll usually immediately give a side-eye to is Hexbear, and only them because a significant percentage of those folks have a certain.... style and culture that gets on my nerves. But an individual can still be a cool person and it's not like I'm about to come in the comments and dunk on you or preemptively block you based on your home instance. I block users because they're assholes, or annoying, or argue in bad faith, not based on where their account is hosted. And I would expect that's probably consistent across most lemmings. You won't get a bad rap only for being affiliated with ml. Now if you say something stupid somebody might use it as a bludgeon to talk bad about ml as a whole, or vice versa, but that's going to happen any time you have something approaching "team sports" like this.

In general, don't stress this too much. In specific, keep up with what's happening on your home instance and if they're doing something you don't like, pack up and move elsewhere. That's a core function of the way the fediverse is constructed. If it sucks, hit the bricks. You can just leave, and set up shop in another instance, or host your own, and you aren't beholden to anyone. But if you don't care then you don't have to.

Short answer: yes
Long answer: some of us even have entire instances blocked

I don't judge users like that unless they're from some actually nasty instance. Lemmy.ml is somewhat politically aligned like you said, but it's still generally a "normal" option, with lots of "normal" users.

You can create more accounts elsewhere to see if your experience changes, but I think ml should be okay.

Edit: And I don't think carefully choosing an instance is that important. You can always go elsewhere. Just read the rules and if they seem ok, go for it.

In your settings you can export a file containing all the communities you have subscribed to. Import that file in the settings of your new account on a new instance and then carry on :)

I don't judge people based on their instance. Although, there are a few instances I have just straight up blocked because their users just cause way too many problems.

That said? If someone is being a jerk, I will look at their instance and quite often have a "yeah, that checks out". I don't really have any issues with lemmy.ml but I have definitely noticed a "type" of user. Not bad enough to block the instance but enough that it often counts as two strikes as far as I am concerned. Be a jerk and I see you are from lemmy.ml? Good odds I just block you then and there rather than checking your comment history to see if this is a recurring theme or not.

All else held equal, I'd guess that someone on a .ml instance -- which is chosen to refer to "Marxism-Leninism" --is more likely to be far left, just as someone on pawb.social is a furry, lemmy.blahaj.zone to be trans, or aussie.zone to be Australian. Does that mean that everyone on all of those instances are any of those? No, of course not.

And lemmy.ml was the second-largest instance during the outflow from Reddit, so a lot of people just grabbed it.

Personally, in choosing an instance, it probably wouldn't be the one I'd choose. I also wouldn't pick it because it's gonna be where the latest release gets put into production first and you're liable to crash into any issues -- lemmy.world admins, for example, are far more conservative, did minimal patching to fix critical bugs rather than jumping right on 0.19, and their userbase avoided crashing into the broken 0.19 releases. On the other hand, if you've established an identity on lemmy.ml and are otherwise happy with it...shrugs

Some instances, like hexbear.net or lemmygrad.ml, are far-out-there enough that some instances might defederate with the instance, which I think is probably a bigger concern. I don't think that that's nearly as much a risk with lemmy.ml.

On one side you're expected to register to an instance that suits you; like, anime fans in ani.social, people interested in LGBT+ topics in blahaj.zone, so goes on. And there's that common knowledge that, if you feel out-of-place in an instance, you can register to another.

On another, people know that plenty other people don't know (or don't care) about instances. And sometimes you get really clueless posters, specially recent redditfugees.

So yes, you'll be judged by some people. Not by everyone. (Personally I use the user's instance as a heuristic factor on the type of user that I'm dealing with. But on its own it's simply too little info to conclude anything.)

Now, regarding specifically lemmy.ml: I was part of that instance for a few years, so be aware that you might run into problems later on because the admin team there is prone to enforce hidden rules. Still, I don't expect you to be judged based on any "strong" stereotype regarding that instance, as it used to be the flagship instance, so you got plenty "random" users there.

If you’re concerned you should set up accounts on other instances. It’s easy.

Yes and no. I don't judge immediately, but if someone says something sus, and their instance matches the sus vibe, then I judge.

In fact, I think all extremism is stupid.

🤔

I signed up for the first one I saw, and subscribed across instances without ever considering that people might care where you came from.

People are going to judge. I try to not to be like people.

When I joined Lemmy it felt so nice. It felt like the early Internet; all the bullshit I got used to on Reddit, it wasn't here. It was like feeling at home.

Nowadays, whenever I see toxic bullshit and sedition disguised as leftism, it's someone from lemmy.ml; my Lemmy-experience got a lot better after blocking the lemmy.ml-instance. But I will start blocking more aggressively and I hope things get better after the US-elections.

if you're in one of the "far-left" instances or unmoderated instances that are sources of spam, you're probably gonna get judged, otherwise no. i didn't know lemmy.ml had this reputation and made my account here as well but i don't really mind since i don't have that many issues with moderation here.

"a normal guy without any politic side" is a very political position and i suggest you find an instance that agrees with that position since a very important filter on what you can or can not see is the admins of the instance you are using. i doubt you are missing much on lemmy.ml but you can always try other instances and see which communities they have there that isn't present on lemmy.ml.

as a side note lemmy is, disappointingly, just another digital social media platform but federated. you're still gonna see people fight, throw their opinions at each other and in general talk about politics. a large segment of people on lemmy are either reddit refugees or people that were rejected from other social media. yes on average people here tend to be older and more educated compared to general population that use the internet, but most people here are outside the "norm".

Personally I do not assume anything about a user’s instance (or look at it at all usually). But I do pay attention to the instance a community belongs to, because some instances have significant numbers of hostile people that belong to them (Lemmy.ml is a prominent example). Personally I would not want to belong to that instance because it would put me into more contact with those people.

I think there are some instances that are more averse to defederation, and based on what you’ve said, those might be a better home for you.

I've had people guess that I'm probably Canadian since I use lemmy.ca, but for me, generally, I don't judge people by their instance since I don't default to looking for it and my default apps don't display it, but when I've gotten into frustrating circular arguments with people I have often noticed that they're from lemmy.ml.

Personally I think this is why Bluesky's ATProtocol design of not tying identity to instance is a good thing, but since that's not opened up yet that's a little neither here nor there.

Lemmy.ml is basically Lemmygrad trying to look more neutral, but actually is the same thing. That's why I block all lemmy.ml communities that I come across. As for users I might not inherently judge them, but I do keep a close eye on them in regards to potential political statements being made, because of how many of them I've seen making bad faith arguments, or straight up spread disinformation and other bullshit.

Generally no, it doesn't make a difference to me. However if you say something which I think is extremely stupid I might dismiss you based on the instance assuming it's one of the usual suspects; lemmy.ml, hexbear, lemmygrad etc.

I spend an hour or so on Lemmy a day and other than the bad bad ones (the ones named to attract predators etc) I have no clue what all the instances are. I see lemmy.ml and assume it's just a lesser used main instance.

So, no judgement from me.

Welcome to the fediverse, where you are morally complicit in the crimes of your admins!

But yeah, personally I think the way instances and defederation are handled in Mastodon/Lemmy is one of the big problems with it at the moment. Depending on what instance you are on, you'll get "locked out" of certain communities and from certain people, and there's generally very little accountability and transparency about it.

For example, lemmy.ml blocks one of the two furry instances, so you'll have less comments from furries. It's also apparently becoming more hardcore tankie, so other instances may start blocking it themselves.

I like to think that I'm above all that and don't discriminate based on instance, but there's one instance out there that has done heinous things and I'm not sure I could remain impartial towards people who stay on it...

For me, it's out of sight out of mind.

For the most part I judge communities based on their instance, not the people. I might be more inclined to block you if you can something sketchy but probably not. But if a server get super toxic/tankie, I may block the whole server. lemmy.ml isn't there yet.

Yeah I made this account first before hopping to one more suited for me. Didnt turn out well there but generall if you're pretty new i imagine most people arent too attached to their instance

Fuk em.

Edit: if people are judging you based off what server you are in, unless it is an openly hostile instance, their opinions are most likely not very valid.

why is everyone judging me for the people I choose to associate with?

lemmy.ml is not just far left, it´s full of fucking tankies. Because of that you might be considered a tankie when using an .ml account. I recommend making an account on a more neutral instance.