Tweety. I like stretching

Stamets@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world – 202 points –
73

...can I take more than one?

I read it as "you have two" so you can have at least 2. However many past the first you want to shove up there is up to you

I've been talking about Choco Tacos all week. What the fuck do I have to do to get one? This implies they are still around for me to be able to shove one up my ass. Is that what I have to do? I'll fucking do it at this point

Now I'm gonna need someone to rap a homemade recipe to me

I make damn good ice cream, too... it shouldn't be too hard to replicate but it's been so long since I've had one I forget the exact construction.

Soggy waffle cone shell is a must. Vanilla, covered in a chocolate shell. Nuts maybe? I suppose I could look it up

but like, do I line the waffle cone with chocolate like they do with a drumstick? like, between the cone and the ice cream. I can overcomplicate this

You should overcomplicate this. That solid chunk of chocolate at the bottom is the best part. If I'm being honest, I think a choco taco is just a drumstick in taco form

Firecracker and it's not even close. I've put ice cubes up there before and it wasn't nearly as bad as you'd imagine. The shape of it will make it easy. Plus, the ridges on it mean you'll have less ice in contact with your skin. At some point it melts and it's just a Popsicle stick.

Edit: Additional thoughts on this because I can't stop thinking about how goofy this is lol. I've cream sandwich and to a lesser degree the chipwich are tempting. The difficulty would be that they just crumble and don't really go in, but you have to shove it in. I'm counting melted ice cream/ice that comes out after it's in as not needing to be reinserted. I've cream sandwich "crust" is actually very soft so it wouldn't be bad to have in there. It's just the process of getting it in would be very weirdly difficult.

Many of the other choices (like the snow cone thing and push pop) have a lot of plastic parts that make it basically impossible.

The drumstick may seem tempting but it's just gonna crack and hurt.

Once the popsicle stick of the firecracker is in, you just softly pull it out. The biggest risk is splinters, but I don't think popsicle sticks in popsicles ever really have splinters like the loose ones you can buy for projects.

I'm gonna need some clarifications here. Does the stick/cone/tube go for the ride? How far up the ass does it need to go? Is this a proper insertion or a wedding-cake photo-op mushing situation? If it's insertion, can the ice cream be modified to fit the butthole, or must the butthole adapt to the ice cream? There's a lot of moving parts and complex interplay going on.

In Germany we have an ice cram called Flutsch Finger for exactly that purpose.

Wow I forgot all about screwballs! Those used to be my favorite as a kid I wonder if I can still get them

Firecracker is the nearest thing to a red rocket, so

Why did they write "to" as 2, but then the actual number 1 as "one"?

Not including a Golden Gaytime in these options is a real missed opportunity...

That's so weird - I heard about, for the first time, and looked up this ice-cream only this morning. There was a failed petition to change the name, which generated a number of counter petitions.

Anyone that says anything other than Choco Taco is a coward.

I've seen enough EMT Tiktok to know that I need a flared base.

So I'ma have to go with screwball but upside down

The firecracker looks like it could get a good leverage and the chilling sensation would be new.

Same goes for the pushpop and i could get a good rhythm going like a jackhammer.

Longevity is probably going to be the biggest hurdle here though

You can’t stop me from shoving them all up there.

Asked my girlfriend for a second opinion, she said Screwball backwards and she's right, damn it.

Anyone who doesn't choose a Creamsicle is not getting the full experience of something up your ass

I might get flagged for spamming this same response everywhere, but snow cone backwards all day, Alex.

Chipwich and I'll smash it into my ass like I'm an upside down cookie monster.

Your mom's fist isn't on the list... So, none of the above.

Push pop.... And Firecracker... May as well go for it...

I only like room temperature objects in my ass. I will have to pass.

This is one of those "To show loyalty to Israel" challenges right? Can't I just blow the donkey?

Choco taco.... in the name of racism, please americans explain me how have you come to this?!