the future is now, old man

SSTF@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world – 564 points –
50

Where do I become a holy fool?

Right? Like does it come with good benefits and a 401k match too? I mean I'm already sold but the highwayman job is quite lacking in that space. Asking for a friend

I didn't realize train robber was still an option

An entire life of shennigans and mischief wasted, I COULDA ROBBED TRAINS?!

Also coulda been robbing banks with an avocado, but like me you've been mooching around like a goddamn chump....

Well the goods have become larger and heavier, you'll probably need to kidnap the train before you can rob it.

I suppose I could utilize a larger train to kidnap the train

It was never NOT an option.

We do still have trains, don't we?

"I wanna be TikTok when I grow up."

"You want to make content for TikTok?"

"No! I want to be the app!"

It sounds stupid, but kids are stupid. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a police car. Not a cop, the car. Sometimes dreams need to stay dreams.

Well, have you ever seen a police car break any laws? Your dream was great, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

I appreciate it, but I changed course and switched to IT. I grew up to be a server rack now and it has been great!

Never give up on your dream, it might just be possible with enough cybernetics and plastic surgery! The future is now!

I can't remember, but do the cars eat at any point? What do they eat?

"I want children to be addicted to touching my body with their grubby little hands"

A few Catholic priests, salivating, enters the chat.

Just the stuff thats visible here is already more than 100% lol

Which is why you don't see "mathematician" on the list.

Maybe some kids want multiple jobs

No one wants two jobs, but the kids these days know they'll need it

Many kids would like to be a teacher on Monday, an astronaut on Tuesday, a veterinarian on Wednesday, ....

But I guess here the demographic is a little older than my example so it might not apply

Woke moralist. The destroyer of Jordan Peterson.

Pretty sure that was the benzos

Woke Moralists and Benzos handshake meme: Destroying Jordan Bitchass Peterson

Hey fellow kids! Who wants to be a woke moralist, amirite?

(e: I had a son, so I do believe the 11.9% train robber stat, tho)

Had? I hope you’re ok.

Oh no, he’s fine. Poor choice of words; he’s all grown up now is all.

I'm a wojak artist.

Real human bean

I guess my toddlers aren't main stream then. One wants to be a policefiremantruck and the other a snail tamer.

Snail tamer sounds like an amazing job

Its very dangerous. A feral snail can be more deadly than the monthy python rabbit. The tend to be cool tho