::: spoiler bonus question:
what does it mean to be too online anymore?
:::
They know what Lemmy is.
đź‘Źđź‘Źđź‘Ź
Sometimes I see people rant about people in a way that makes me believe they rarely interact with anyone face to face. Complete lack of anything positive to say about others, can only discuss topics that mean something to themselves, no ability to put themselves in someone else's shoes.
Lemmy, reddit, 4chan... You find them all around. If you ask me, it's likely caused by childhood isolation. Kids who grow up in a tense environment or with certain disorders tend to be outcasts when growing up and this creates a bitterness towards the world.
It feels unfair that there is a way most people behave towards one another that you can not be a part of. And it's always easier to blame the environment than to look inward, find out what is causing these feelings and how to combat them. This is easily said when you're past your 30s, but a 7 year old kid does not have the capacity to do this level of self reflection. So the effects of being an outcast compound. At some point it just becomes easier to direct your anger at faceless strangers and avoid any kind of real social situations. And this, of course, also compounds.
But that's just my armchair psychology take on it. I have been somewhat of an outcast up until college (although not nearly as bad as some other kids I've met). College was an eye-opener for me due to the acceptance and positivity that was around everyone. I noticed quickly that the happiest folks where the ones who spoke mostly of things they liked. It's a cliche for a reason, but a positive attitude breeds positivity.
I think Lemmy is better about this. Certainly better than Reddit or 4chan. I think because of the small community. There are people itching for a fight or to troll, but by and large I've had way more positive interactions here than negative. I think when a community gets sufficiently large, it gets exhausting dealing with so many bitter, damaged people that civility is forgotten or civil members remove themselves as self-care.
I definitely agree with your last point. Everyone is uplifted by positivity.
I agree Lemmy contains more positivity. I would like to nominate the folks over at Stop Drinking for a positivity award. Also the communities that share wholesome moments.
But for most of what I see, it's bots posting news.
I think the median age is higher here and the mods more mature and experienced.
They spend so much time on Lemmy that they start replying to their own comments.
I can relate to this one.
When they seem to think it's socially acceptable to scroll while hanging out with other people. I usually give the benefit of the doubt--"oh they're responding to a text....... right? oh damn, they are scrolling? and I'm sitting right here with them?"
yea, that's not great
It isn't?
If they frequently reference memes IRL, says "lol" with their voice, complain that you don't answer messages immediately, sit idle in a voice chatroom, notices the the typo, anime profile pic, uses x.com.
I see what you did there
Well, tbf, I say “lol” IRL, but only when I’m mocking people…
lol
I didn't notice a typo... :(
You didn't see the the typo?
I don't know what that link is, but I won't be clicking it since I'm at work. Talk about sus
Constantly referencing TikToks/Insta reels
Unironically talking about YouTuber beefs
The only jokes they’re capable of making are meme references
Their phone’s photo album is practically empty or only screenshots
Their phone’s photo album is practically empty or only screenshots
That's a weird one. My phone's camera is really only for emergencies or odd random situations.
I HAVE TEN THOUSAND PICTURES OF MY CATS
I had to offload 20k photos because my phone was full. I’m excited to upgrade to a 1TB phone.
Well I have a simple formula just for this:
If they believe things I believe, like things I like and go to the web pages I do: they're a productive, well-socialized chad ubermensch patrician. No online issues there, even if they spend 24/7 online they must need it.
If they don't believe things I believe, don't like the things I like, and go to websites I avoid: they're too online, probably an incel too and likely a terrorist in the making and sorely need to touch grass and should have their internet connection stopped.
::: spoiler spoiler
/s
:::
A number of tells. Here's my shortlist.
Missing work, school, or other important obligations. Basically neglecting responsibilities.
Preferring online interactions over face-to-face ones. On the phone all the time, even when with people.
Anxious, irritable, or depressed when not online
Losing track of time while online.
Sleep deprived.
Not sure how to answer when asked how much they're online
I once ran out of questions I could answer on OKCupid.
Nice try mom! I'm still not cleaning my room. Stay off my forum.
I dont know anymore, been here too long.
They use Lemmy
Sending me news links that are social media posts containing a link to a news article. Especially if it's from Xitter: no way I'm logging into that place just to see replies.
It tells me that they didn't read the article and that they expect me to care what the shit posters reacting to the headline think.
"Lol"
That’s a pretty wide net. Lol has been part of chat and text for ages. Even rarely online individuals instinctively use it in those environments. Or do you mean using it unironically in face to face conversations? Then I’d agree.
Yeah, spoken "lol" in place of saying "that's funny" or, y'know, actually laughing.
Woof, yeah come across that a few times. Some gentle ribbing was usually enough to snap them out of it haha.
I've heard someone actually say "poggers" in a real person to person conversation.
Sometimes I hear a remark during a conversation that just seems out of place, but is said with the air of a proverb, and that's how I know it's a reference to something popular on social media and that for me is too online.
I noticed that a lot of my friends who are really online think that everyone will always agree with them.
My theory is that this happens because they are used to their algorithm only showing them content/comments of things they agree with and since that makes the bulk of interactions with other people, they think everyone is like that.
Also dehumanizing people who they aren't politically aligned with. I think that people who "touch grass" more often, deal with people all over the political spectrum so they can separate the human side from the politics side.
These are just my theories btw I don't have evidence aside from my anecdotes. A sample pool of like 10 people lol so clearly not enough
They keep rambling on about jeans and beans even though you stopped contributing to the conversation several minutes ago...
Take a jet in jeans to get your beans!
When they know who pedobear is
Could that also be a sign that the person is simply older?
FGSFDS
oh come on
When they are actively livestreaming themselves.
I'm always online myself and I don't do any of the things typically memed about with people who are "terminally online." Shit might have made sense back when the only way to be online was with a computer that you couldn't just pop out of your pocket while standing in line or taking a shit. With smartphones, though, you can literally be online all day while also living a life.
The good ol’ days where the only people always online with us were other nerds sitting at computers all day. What a different internet.
The question lacks depth of perspective. Human social needs are a fundamental part of life. The question lacks an understanding of the range of circumstances some human experience. Also, this perspective can be degrading and demeaning to someone such as myself that experiences nearly complete social isolation due to physical disability.
Sorry. This is why I included the bonus question:
what does it mean to be too online anymore?
This wasn't included in jest but in recognition that for many now there isn't any too online, it's simply the means of socializing, among other things.
What condescending claptrap. Degrading and demeaning? If you’re always online because you’re disabled and that’s the only way you can interact with people, then you’re not too online, are you?
Verbosity and hair-trigger outrage, however… yup, that smacks a bit of being too online.
Get off OPs back, dingus.
Verbosity and hair-trigger outrage
What condescending claptrap. Get off OPs back, dingus.
Y'all dinguses quit acting like dang doofuses
Edit lol laintrain commented "cringe" on a joke comment that is clearly stupid wordplay
When by hearing their opinion on, say, gun-control I can then succesfully predict their stance on 15 other completely unrelated subjects.
That's ridiculous. Acting like partisan issues that have been that way for 50 years are from spending time on the internet is pedantic. My grandparents spent no time on the internet and they still toed the line on partisan issues.
The issue is propaganda, not the injection medium although socials are more effective it seems
They know what Lemmy is.
đź‘Źđź‘Źđź‘Ź
Sometimes I see people rant about people in a way that makes me believe they rarely interact with anyone face to face. Complete lack of anything positive to say about others, can only discuss topics that mean something to themselves, no ability to put themselves in someone else's shoes.
.........you're describing Lemmy users, aren't you?
Lemmy, reddit, 4chan... You find them all around. If you ask me, it's likely caused by childhood isolation. Kids who grow up in a tense environment or with certain disorders tend to be outcasts when growing up and this creates a bitterness towards the world.
It feels unfair that there is a way most people behave towards one another that you can not be a part of. And it's always easier to blame the environment than to look inward, find out what is causing these feelings and how to combat them. This is easily said when you're past your 30s, but a 7 year old kid does not have the capacity to do this level of self reflection. So the effects of being an outcast compound. At some point it just becomes easier to direct your anger at faceless strangers and avoid any kind of real social situations. And this, of course, also compounds.
But that's just my armchair psychology take on it. I have been somewhat of an outcast up until college (although not nearly as bad as some other kids I've met). College was an eye-opener for me due to the acceptance and positivity that was around everyone. I noticed quickly that the happiest folks where the ones who spoke mostly of things they liked. It's a cliche for a reason, but a positive attitude breeds positivity.
I think Lemmy is better about this. Certainly better than Reddit or 4chan. I think because of the small community. There are people itching for a fight or to troll, but by and large I've had way more positive interactions here than negative. I think when a community gets sufficiently large, it gets exhausting dealing with so many bitter, damaged people that civility is forgotten or civil members remove themselves as self-care.
I definitely agree with your last point. Everyone is uplifted by positivity.
I agree Lemmy contains more positivity. I would like to nominate the folks over at Stop Drinking for a positivity award. Also the communities that share wholesome moments. But for most of what I see, it's bots posting news.
I think the median age is higher here and the mods more mature and experienced.
They spend so much time on Lemmy that they start replying to their own comments.
I can relate to this one.
When they seem to think it's socially acceptable to scroll while hanging out with other people. I usually give the benefit of the doubt--"oh they're responding to a text....... right? oh damn, they are scrolling? and I'm sitting right here with them?"
yea, that's not great
It isn't?
If they frequently reference memes IRL, says "lol" with their voice, complain that you don't answer messages immediately, sit idle in a voice chatroom, notices the the typo, anime profile pic, uses x.com.
I see what you did there
Well, tbf, I say “lol” IRL, but only when I’m mocking people…
lol
I didn't notice a typo... :(
You didn't see the the typo?
I don't know what that link is, but I won't be clicking it since I'm at work. Talk about sus
Constantly referencing TikToks/Insta reels
Unironically talking about YouTuber beefs
The only jokes they’re capable of making are meme references
Their phone’s photo album is practically empty or only screenshots
That's a weird one. My phone's camera is really only for emergencies or odd random situations.
I HAVE TEN THOUSAND PICTURES OF MY CATS
I had to offload 20k photos because my phone was full. I’m excited to upgrade to a 1TB phone.
Well I have a simple formula just for this:
If they believe things I believe, like things I like and go to the web pages I do: they're a productive, well-socialized chad ubermensch patrician. No online issues there, even if they spend 24/7 online they must need it.
If they don't believe things I believe, don't like the things I like, and go to websites I avoid: they're too online, probably an incel too and likely a terrorist in the making and sorely need to touch grass and should have their internet connection stopped.
::: spoiler spoiler /s :::
A number of tells. Here's my shortlist.
Don't ask how I know...
You're here.
I once ran out of questions I could answer on OKCupid.
Nice try mom! I'm still not cleaning my room. Stay off my forum.
I dont know anymore, been here too long.
They use Lemmy
Sending me news links that are social media posts containing a link to a news article. Especially if it's from Xitter: no way I'm logging into that place just to see replies.
It tells me that they didn't read the article and that they expect me to care what the shit posters reacting to the headline think.
"Lol"
That’s a pretty wide net. Lol has been part of chat and text for ages. Even rarely online individuals instinctively use it in those environments. Or do you mean using it unironically in face to face conversations? Then I’d agree.
Yeah, spoken "lol" in place of saying "that's funny" or, y'know, actually laughing.
Woof, yeah come across that a few times. Some gentle ribbing was usually enough to snap them out of it haha.
I've heard someone actually say "poggers" in a real person to person conversation.
Sometimes I hear a remark during a conversation that just seems out of place, but is said with the air of a proverb, and that's how I know it's a reference to something popular on social media and that for me is too online.
I noticed that a lot of my friends who are really online think that everyone will always agree with them.
My theory is that this happens because they are used to their algorithm only showing them content/comments of things they agree with and since that makes the bulk of interactions with other people, they think everyone is like that.
Also dehumanizing people who they aren't politically aligned with. I think that people who "touch grass" more often, deal with people all over the political spectrum so they can separate the human side from the politics side.
These are just my theories btw I don't have evidence aside from my anecdotes. A sample pool of like 10 people lol so clearly not enough
They keep rambling on about jeans and beans even though you stopped contributing to the conversation several minutes ago...
Take a jet in jeans to get your beans!
When they know who pedobear is
Could that also be a sign that the person is simply older?
FGSFDS
oh come on
When they are actively livestreaming themselves.
I'm always online myself and I don't do any of the things typically memed about with people who are "terminally online." Shit might have made sense back when the only way to be online was with a computer that you couldn't just pop out of your pocket while standing in line or taking a shit. With smartphones, though, you can literally be online all day while also living a life.
The good ol’ days where the only people always online with us were other nerds sitting at computers all day. What a different internet.
Whatsapp Web: Synchronising Messages. %0... %1... %2...
The question lacks depth of perspective. Human social needs are a fundamental part of life. The question lacks an understanding of the range of circumstances some human experience. Also, this perspective can be degrading and demeaning to someone such as myself that experiences nearly complete social isolation due to physical disability.
Sorry. This is why I included the bonus question:
This wasn't included in jest but in recognition that for many now there isn't any too online, it's simply the means of socializing, among other things.
What condescending claptrap. Degrading and demeaning? If you’re always online because you’re disabled and that’s the only way you can interact with people, then you’re not too online, are you?
Verbosity and hair-trigger outrage, however… yup, that smacks a bit of being too online.
Get off OPs back, dingus.
Y'all dinguses quit acting like dang doofuses
Edit lol laintrain commented "cringe" on a joke comment that is clearly stupid wordplay
I do enjoy irony. I'm not always sure whether someone is in on the joke or not, but I enjoy it either way.
Quoting online talking points word-for-word
Always - Very Online Guy lyric video "He's a very online guy. He types his cool replies. He's incredibly animal."
When by hearing their opinion on, say, gun-control I can then succesfully predict their stance on 15 other completely unrelated subjects.
That's ridiculous. Acting like partisan issues that have been that way for 50 years are from spending time on the internet is pedantic. My grandparents spent no time on the internet and they still toed the line on partisan issues.
The issue is propaganda, not the injection medium although socials are more effective it seems