Gambit? Masterful. Car door? Slammed. Dick? Fully inside car door. 12-D chess? Played. Same time tomorrow.
Look at Mr. "Multple dicks to slam into car doors" over here š
I was gonna say doors probably won't chop a dick completely off, but if it's a cyber truck all bets are off.
I had almost forgotten about that "finger chop" feature on them...those videos are nightmare fuel
X-Men names
Ah yes I remember the Xmen known as dick, he had such a big....personality that sometimes he can be kind of a wankerš¤£š¤£
So he's the head of the conspiracy and should be the one charged?
Did he just sue himself?
Ah yes, suing your customers is a brilliant way to get more people to buy your stuff.
So let me get this straightā¦
buy a platform
ruin it and push away advertisers
tell them you donāt need them and they should go fuck themselves
sue them for leaving
ā¦?
'5. Colonize Mars
By this next next year... Definitely within the next 1000 months
Advertisers have given me no moneys either.
Send cheque plz.
I'd really love to see fElon get what he wants here.
One paid ad from all the companies.
"Elon fucks kids"
Can I chip in on thisā¦?
Send cheque plz
I read that in the voice of Mona-Lisa Saperstein from Parks and Rec
Money pweeez!
yeah damnit, I waste my personal time having to watch the damn things. Advertisers should be paying us for the privilege of our attention.
Suing former advertisers may possibly not be the best way to get other advertisers to come to your platform.
Man who told advertisers to go fuck themselves sues advertisers for not spending money on his platform.
I'm sure this will be sure to bring in tons of advertising dollars to Der Xitter.
I ain't no genius, but maybe the advertisers are busy fucking themselves as per Elon's suggestion. š¤·āāļø
Wow, I didn't think he could top his past idiocy, but this is pretty impressive. "You were unfair to me because I'm a terrible piece of shit and you didn't want the association of your brand and my nazi site so you owe me money!" It's just incredible.
Hat tip, Lonnie. You've outdone yourself again.
Musk is suing under antitrust laws. Iām not sure they work that way. Antitrust laws prevent producers from consolidating and exploiting consumers. However, when it comes to advertising placements, the companies are consumers, not producers, and I donāt think a consumer advocacy group (which the World Federation of Advertisers functions as in this regard) is illegal.
I donāt know, I am not a lawyer, but it seems like Twitter is grasping at straws here.
Let's also note that at any other time, Musk would be railing against antitrust laws.
The interesting thing is that it means he is desperate enough to try something that makes him look this stupid
Anybody with Elon Musk centric stocks needs to sell them quickly
I know right? I mean if they colluded to lower advertising prices through collective agreement that would be something. Especially if they had an internal forcing mechanism to ensure compliance.
But um, they set out voluntary guidelines they suggested everyone follow to protect each member's own best interests, and decided to spend zero dollars to buy nothing, which is a far far cry from trying to spend zero dollars to buy something.
What an ultra-maroon.
Mandatory product purchasing. The ultimate capitalistās wet dreamā¦
Just like vehicle insurance.
Your honor, I demand they like me. Why doesn't anyone like me...
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I present to you Exhibit A.
That is all, I rest my case. Thank you.
Imagine the prosecuting attorney in the opening scene of Better Call Saul, coming into the court room with a tape of this in his hand.
Without saying a word, the tv cart is pushed into the court room and he slowly pushed the tape in.
The entire court room stays silent as the video is played, with the lone exception of Musk who is tweeting about how unfair the judge is.
Did you hear about the jurisprudence fetishist who got off in court?
(... I'll see myself out.)
"Why did people stop paying me for services I no longer provide!?"
- Some guy who burnt down his house and then yelled at Air BnB users for cancelling their bookings
Didn't he sue another company that did tests on the site to see if ads would show up beside hateful content, which showed they would, and that case ended up being dismissed?
Being a lawyer and working for someone like Musk must be both rewarding and embarrassing at the same time.
rewarding
lucrative, yes... rewarding? maybe not so much.
You never "what if'ed" at your job? I don't think the lawyers complain too much...
Rewarding because you can accurately gauge exactly how much smarter you are than the world's richest man?
Or rewarding because you get to burden the legal system with all those hypotheticals that the one troll in your law classes kept asking and your professors kept claiming "no judge would ever entertain that idea"?
I assumed rewarding as in another house and stable work
Free market gets sued for practising freedom
āFree speech absolutionistā my ass
His "Free Speech Absolutionism" is just.... Freedom from any consequences for what you say.... Which is also a really stupid thought process..
Welp, time to set up a lemonade stand and sue everybody who didnāt stop to buy my $5000 cups of watered-down kool-aid.
I didnāt know we could be entitled to advertisement money. Hang on while I sue Unilever for some free money in return for wearing a sandwich board with their logo on it
Something, something, free market something
What a pinheaded twit.
holy shit i honestly don't know whether i hate twatter/muks more or advertisers more--is it possible for them to both lose, please?
What a silly weirdo.
ELI5 by Claude 3.5 Sonnet:
Imagine you have a big playground where lots of kids come to play and talk. This playground is called X (it used to be called Twitter).
One day, some grown-ups who make toys and candy decided they didn't want to let kids play with their stuff on this playground. They told other grown-ups not to bring their toys there either.
The person in charge of the playground, Linda, thinks this isn't fair. She says the playground is better than ever, with more kids playing and having fun.
Linda is upset because the grown-ups are being mean and not sharing their toys, even though the playground is safe and fun. So now, she's telling a teacher (which is like a judge for grown-ups) that these people are being unfair and breaking the rules.
She wants the teacher to make them play fair and bring their toys back to the playground. Linda thinks this will make the playground even better for all the kids who like to play there.
::: spoiler Associated Press - News Source Context (Click to view Full Report)
Information for Associated Press:
Didn't he tell them to "go fuck themselves?" š¤
He did and how he's suprised I guess
Poor Mr. Perfume he must REALLY need the money...
Gambit? Masterful. Car door? Slammed. Dick? Fully inside car door. 12-D chess? Played. Same time tomorrow.
Look at Mr. "Multple dicks to slam into car doors" over here š
I was gonna say doors probably won't chop a dick completely off, but if it's a cyber truck all bets are off.
I had almost forgotten about that "finger chop" feature on them...those videos are nightmare fuel
X-Men names
Ah yes I remember the Xmen known as dick, he had such a big....personality that sometimes he can be kind of a wankerš¤£š¤£
So he's the head of the conspiracy and should be the one charged?
Did he just sue himself?
Ah yes, suing your customers is a brilliant way to get more people to buy your stuff.
So let me get this straightā¦
ā¦?
'5. Colonize Mars
By this next next year... Definitely within the next 1000 months
Advertisers have given me no moneys either.
Send cheque plz.
I'd really love to see fElon get what he wants here. One paid ad from all the companies.
"Elon fucks kids"
Can I chip in on thisā¦?
I read that in the voice of Mona-Lisa Saperstein from Parks and Rec
Money pweeez!
yeah damnit, I waste my personal time having to watch the damn things. Advertisers should be paying us for the privilege of our attention.
Suing former advertisers may possibly not be the best way to get other advertisers to come to your platform.
Man who told advertisers to go fuck themselves sues advertisers for not spending money on his platform.
I'm sure this will be sure to bring in tons of advertising dollars to Der Xitter.
I ain't no genius, but maybe the advertisers are busy fucking themselves as per Elon's suggestion. š¤·āāļø
Wow, I didn't think he could top his past idiocy, but this is pretty impressive. "You were unfair to me because I'm a terrible piece of shit and you didn't want the association of your brand and my nazi site so you owe me money!" It's just incredible.
Hat tip, Lonnie. You've outdone yourself again.
Musk is suing under antitrust laws. Iām not sure they work that way. Antitrust laws prevent producers from consolidating and exploiting consumers. However, when it comes to advertising placements, the companies are consumers, not producers, and I donāt think a consumer advocacy group (which the World Federation of Advertisers functions as in this regard) is illegal.
I donāt know, I am not a lawyer, but it seems like Twitter is grasping at straws here.
Let's also note that at any other time, Musk would be railing against antitrust laws.
The interesting thing is that it means he is desperate enough to try something that makes him look this stupid
Anybody with Elon Musk centric stocks needs to sell them quickly
I know right? I mean if they colluded to lower advertising prices through collective agreement that would be something. Especially if they had an internal forcing mechanism to ensure compliance.
But um, they set out voluntary guidelines they suggested everyone follow to protect each member's own best interests, and decided to spend zero dollars to buy nothing, which is a far far cry from trying to spend zero dollars to buy something.
What an ultra-maroon.
Mandatory product purchasing. The ultimate capitalistās wet dreamā¦
Just like vehicle insurance.
Your honor, I demand they like me. Why doesn't anyone like me...
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I present to you Exhibit A.
That is all, I rest my case. Thank you.
Imagine the prosecuting attorney in the opening scene of Better Call Saul, coming into the court room with a tape of this in his hand.
Without saying a word, the tv cart is pushed into the court room and he slowly pushed the tape in.
The entire court room stays silent as the video is played, with the lone exception of Musk who is tweeting about how unfair the judge is.
Ah so the full Alex Jones courtroom experience
Goddamn he looks so punchable
https://youtu.be/SN0rWCCtHD0
Tell that to Earth!
The duden must have a fetish for doomed lawsuits.
Courtroom BDSM fetish
Did you hear about the jurisprudence fetishist who got off in court?
(... I'll see myself out.)
"Why did people stop paying me for services I no longer provide!?"
- Some guy who burnt down his house and then yelled at Air BnB users for cancelling their bookings
Didn't he sue another company that did tests on the site to see if ads would show up beside hateful content, which showed they would, and that case ended up being dismissed?
Being a lawyer and working for someone like Musk must be both rewarding and embarrassing at the same time.
lucrative, yes... rewarding? maybe not so much.
You never "what if'ed" at your job? I don't think the lawyers complain too much...
Rewarding because you can accurately gauge exactly how much smarter you are than the world's richest man?
Or rewarding because you get to burden the legal system with all those hypotheticals that the one troll in your law classes kept asking and your professors kept claiming "no judge would ever entertain that idea"?
I assumed rewarding as in another house and stable work
Free market gets sued for practising freedom
āFree speech absolutionistā my ass
His "Free Speech Absolutionism" is just.... Freedom from any consequences for what you say.... Which is also a really stupid thought process..
Welp, time to set up a lemonade stand and sue everybody who didnāt stop to buy my $5000 cups of watered-down kool-aid.
I didnāt know we could be entitled to advertisement money. Hang on while I sue Unilever for some free money in return for wearing a sandwich board with their logo on it
Something, something, free market something
What a pinheaded twit.
holy shit i honestly don't know whether i hate twatter/muks more or advertisers more--is it possible for them to both lose, please?
What a silly weirdo.
ELI5 by Claude 3.5 Sonnet:
Imagine you have a big playground where lots of kids come to play and talk. This playground is called X (it used to be called Twitter). One day, some grown-ups who make toys and candy decided they didn't want to let kids play with their stuff on this playground. They told other grown-ups not to bring their toys there either.
The person in charge of the playground, Linda, thinks this isn't fair. She says the playground is better than ever, with more kids playing and having fun.
Linda is upset because the grown-ups are being mean and not sharing their toys, even though the playground is safe and fun. So now, she's telling a teacher (which is like a judge for grown-ups) that these people are being unfair and breaking the rules.
She wants the teacher to make them play fair and bring their toys back to the playground. Linda thinks this will make the playground even better for all the kids who like to play there.
::: spoiler Associated Press - News Source Context (Click to view Full Report) Information for Associated Press:
::: spoiler Search topics on Ground.News https://apnews.com/article/x-sues-advertisers-unilever-cvs-mars-orsted-673d1ae88e9fb0ca5b170d238739453e ::: Media Bias Fact Check | bot support